


Beneath Your Beautiful

by puskababy



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Angst, Attempted Murder, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Gay Sex, Language, M/M, Stalking, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-05-04
Packaged: 2017-12-09 05:10:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 51,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/770340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puskababy/pseuds/puskababy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>International rock-star Adam Lambert has a stalker, a stalker that's ruining his life. After it all becomes too much, he is sent to small town Conway to get some much needed R and R, but who he meets there will have an even bigger impact on his life than he ever imagined.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm currently posting this over at lj and am beginning to post it here tonight. If you want to read ahead you can find it on my journal, under the same user name. :)

**Prologue  
2013  
Los Angeles**

Adam Lambert had never given much thought as to how he would die. But dying in the place of someone he loved seemed like a pretty good way to go, and he knew if he didn’t get up there to accept his Grammy, then the poor excuse for a man hiding in the wings would come after his family and friends. From this distance he simply looked like a member of the stage crew, but Adam had seen the glint of steel at his hip – and he’d seen too many movies to not know what it was. 

It was a rifle, a high-powered high calibre firearm that could probably kill a small deer. It was an amazing thing that he hadn’t been spotted yet – after all you couldn’t really conceal a weapon like that could you? But apparently the man could – Adam didn’t even know his name, he only knew him as the Stalker, and it was by sheer force of his paranoia that he’d even noticed him standing there. 

Adam wasn’t always so paranoid – and in fact in recent months he’d made solid steps toward squashing it completely, but being back here had brought all his insecurities back to the surface. He felt like a boy again – that fat, ginger haired boy that nobody liked in school, despite the fact that he was in the Staples Centre in Los Angeles about to accept his first ever Grammy. 

“Are you going to go up?” 

Adam blinked and turned, gazing almost unseeingly into the kind, smiling face of Kris Allen – the man who’d taken up a firm position in his heart, even as he tried to help him with his own. When he looked at Kris all he could see was love, and he knew he didn’t have to be scared anymore. They’d been through so much together and it had only served to strengthen their bond. 

“Yeah” he said softly, squeezing Kris’s hand before rising to his feet. He straightened his Dolce suit as he made his way down the aisle, bending to accept the hugs and kisses people gave him in congratulations. Adam didn’t know this, but according to the music industry, this award had been a long time coming. 

The Stalker watched closely as his target came closer, his fingers fondling the weapon in his grasp. He’d been amazed he’d gotten the weapon past the security teams, but then again he’d impersonated one of the stage crew just so he could have access to the rich and famous. Of them, only one was his intended target – Adam Lambert, and he hadn’t meant for it to go this far. After all he only wanted to love the star – but Adam hadn’t been willing to comply. So now he had to take drastic measures, if he couldn’t have Adam, than no-one else could either. 

Carefully he adjusted the sawn-off rifle as he watched Adam step up onto the stage. God he looked good tonight, dressed to the nines in his Dolce suit with his ebony hair spiked up in his usual coif. It made his dick hard and he felt desire coil in his loins. 

On stage under the hot lights Adam shook Beyonce’s hand as she gave him the award before he stepped in front of the microphone, clearing his throat nervously. He glanced down at the gold statue clutched in his hands for a moment before looking back out to the audience. He’d never felt stage fright so badly in his whole life, but out there right now, knowing his Stalker was watching him with a dangerous weapon, Adam felt his pulse race. 

He cleared his throat again. “Um, wow, this is truly amazing. I know I have a lot of people to thank for getting me to this place…”

The Stalker moved forward, making sure no one was around before he slipped the rifle from his trouser pocket. As predicted, he went unnoticed – all eyes were on the glittering singer before them. Adam Lambert could have fed his adoring public shit on a spoon and they still would have eaten it. That was the magic of his appeal. 

“First I want to thank my parents and my brother, they’ve um had to put up with a lot from me over the years trust me”

At that there was a light smattering of polite laughter from the crowd and the Stalker moved forward, using the shadow from the curtain to raise his weapon. 

Adam smiled humbly and continued. “I want to thank everyone who took a chance on me, all those at the Zodiac Show and the Upright Caberet, you have no idea how great it was for me to get my first taste of the spotlight. Carmit, Lee and Scarlett, Alisan and Danielle for sticking by me, Brad, Tommy-Joe, Brian, Ashley and Isaac, Kevin and Longinue. My Glam Nation dancers Taylor, Terrance and Sasha, all the crew and the people from American Idol for giving me my start…”

Adam’s eyes drifted up then and he caught sight of the raised gun. Ice cold fear slithered down his spine and he knew it was about to happen. He was going to be killed right here in front of everyone and there wasn’t anything anyone could do about it. It seemed a cruel way to go after all his personal progress overcoming his demons. Demons that were brought on by the very person about to murder him. Tears gathered in his eyes and his throat felt hot and tight. 

“Lastly I want to thank my Glamberts, without you I would be nothing. I also really want to thank my partner Kris...you’re amazing and I love you…Thanks” Adam’s voice trailed off and he shot one final glance out to the crowd before Beyonce took his arm. 

He didn’t remember much as he was escorted to the side of the stage, just the horrified screams as his Stalker stepped out from the side of the stage, his rifle raised and ready to shoot. 

It didn’t hurt at first, but Adam was knocked off his feet from the impact of the bullet, a bullet which lodged perilously close to his heart. Beyonce screamed and dropped to her feet beside the fallen idol, doing her best to calm him as chaos reined around them. Distantly Adam was aware of her cool hand on his forehead, but he didn’t want Beyonce. He wanted Kris. Where was Kris? He could make everything better. 

The last thing he saw before the world faded to black was Kris’s worried face, and he knew he could rest now. It would all be over soon.


	2. 2

**New York – Seven months earlier**

 

When he was younger going out late was never a problem for Adam Lambert. It was as if his body were perpetually young, and he had boundless energy because it could be 5am before he even thought about going home. He always partied hard, even when the seductive fingers of fame whispered and called to him. The lure of bright lights and hard dancing always reeled him back. Nothing could stop him. 

Unfortunately that wasn’t the case now. It was barely past 11pm and he was already exhausted: his bones were aching and he felt vaguely sick. The crowd noise was dim behind the curtain and he took a moment to get himself back together before he went out there, for despite his condition, the unforgiving crowd wanted their star. Just the night before Rhianna had been boo’ed off stage after just an hour. Madison Square Garden was one of the biggest arena’s in the country, and also one of the most prestigious, and Adam wasn’t about to let exhaustion stop him performing. 

“Are you good?” David his manager looked concerned, and rested a hand on Adam’s back as he watched the singer guzzle a bottle of water. 

Adam nodded and swallowed, wiping the perspiration from his brow with a shaking hand. He felt like shit. 

“I’m good”

David nodded and handed over another bottle, worried. Adam had been working tirelessly over the last months, and while his dedication to his career was impressive, he needed to look after himself. Of course this whole business with the stalker wasn’t helping things, and David didn’t know what else they could do for him. Because no-one had been caught, they couldn’t issue a restraining order, whoever was sending the photo’s of him was good, very good. It didn’t sit well with him. 

Just then Tommy-Joe stuck his head through the curtain, his Fender still slung over his shoulder. 

“Adam? They’re getting impatient, we gotta wrap this up”

Adam nodded and tried to suppress the weakness that was spreading through him. He just had to get through this last show, then he could rest. 

Mustering his resolve, Adam slipped on his spiked jacket and grabbed the microphone. The mask came back on, obscuring the real Adam from the crowd as he sashayed back onto the stage, salaciously wiping his mouth like he’d just sucked cock. It was deliciously naughty and just what the crowd wanted. 

An hour later the final chords of Kravitz’s ‘Are you Gonna Go My Way?” sounded and the crowd jumped to it’s collective feet. Breathless and more than a little dizzy, Adam gave his final bow and retreated backstage, wobbling on his heeled boots. Everything was swimming, and he knew he’d pushed himself too far tonight. But that’s what the crowd wanted, they wanted him, and so he gave everything he could. 

He didn’t know how he made it back to his dressing room, everything was fuzzy and distant and he could hear people calling his name and yelling and screaming, all clamouring for his attention, but he simply couldn’t give anything else. Every last ounce of energy and strength was gone and he only just made it back to the safety of his dressing room before he stumbled onto the narrow directors chair. 

Breathing heavily he yanked off his jacket and threw it unceremoniously to the floor, fanning his sweaty skin with a hand while he waited for the rush to abate. His ears were ringing from the volume of the amps, and his vision was spotty as he reached for another bottle of water, accidently knocking a piece of paper off the desk. It fluttered to the floor and he paid it no more attention as David burst into the room, followed closely by Tommy-Joe, Ashley, Brian and Isaac. 

“What a fucking rush! That crowd was wild man” Tommy-Joe was saying as he ran a hand through his wet hair. The strands were sticking to his forehead and his heavy make-up was starting to run. 

“Awesome” Ashley agreed, an almost manic grin on her pretty face. 

David let them get it out before he spoke. “Nice show guys, you all did well, despite not feeling great. Adam? You ok now?”

All eyes swung to Adam, who’d hung his head between his knees. His stomach was roiling uncomfortably. 

“I’m good, give me a minute” he muttered. 

Tommy bit his lip, his eyes catching on a piece of paper that had fallen to the floor. He wondered if it was the set-list. 

“What’s this?” he asked as he picked it up, his brows drawing together when he saw the block letters. Holy shit, not again. 

“What is it?” Adam asked, his skin blotchy. He really didn’t look well. 

“Nothing” Tommy answered, too-quickly. Adam frowned and snatched it from him, if possible going even paler as he read it. 

YOU WERE GREAT TONIGHT ADAM. I WATCHED FROM BACKSTAGE. YOU MAKE MY DICK HARD. I’M ALWAYS WATCHING YOU. WE’RE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER. 

“Oh shit” Adam’s hand was at his mouth in an attempt to stop the bile rising in his throat. This was fucked up. It was too much. 

“What the fuck is that?” Ashley asked, pointing to a small white puddle under the make-up table, still scattered with Adam’s beauty products. 

The room was silent as everyone turned to look at it. Adam’s chest was horribly tight now and he felt claustrophobic. 

“That’s not...?” Isaac’s voice trailed off as he realised what it was. 

“Oh hell no”

It was semen. Whoever Adam’s stalker was had broken into his dressing room during the show and masturbated underneath his make-up counter. His things had been disturbed too, moved around. In his current state he hadn’t even noticed, but now it all came at him, battering him like a puppet. 

“I’ve got to get out of here” he managed, rising to his feet and sending the sick letter fluttering to the floor. Vomit burned up his throat and he threw up violently, stumbling away from the mess on shaky legs. It was all too much, the touring, the stress, the fucking stalker. 

“Oh Jesus” David cried as he rushed forward to catch Adam as his legs buckled, heedless of the fact that Adam’s stomach chose that moment to rebel again. This time though there was nothing left, and he whimpered pathetically in David’s arms, shivering. 

“Someone call an ambulance” David said, gently holding his client as Adam trembled. He had no idea it had gotten this bad, Adam had put up a better front that any of them had realised, and it was time he did something about it. 

“It’s ok Ad, you’re ok. Just breathe, that’s it” he said softly, willing the ambulance to hurry. Adam was pale and clammy, his forehead beaded with sweat. He didn’t look good, and David was worried. Once they got him to the hospital things were going to change, and for the better. 

He didn’t want to think about what would happen if they didn’t.

***

Adam woke sometime later to the sound of hushed voices and a painful pinching in his arm. Carefully he kept his eyes closed and didn’t alter his breathing in an attempt to hear what was going on.

“He fucking collapsed Simon, we can’t expect him to bounce back straight away. He needs time to recover” David sounded pissed off and Adam realised he was talking to Simon Fuller, the head of 19 Entertainment. 

“I know. I know we should have, but you know Adam as well as I do. He’s been putting so much pressure on himself lately, This whole business with the stalker isn’t helping either, we need to do something”

Slowly Adam opened his eyes, blinking to clear them as the room came into focus. He was in the hospital, a nice private room from the looks of it. A monitor beeped obnoxiously from beside him and there was an intravenous drip in his arm. He still felt weak and shaky and almost overwhelmingly tired. Exhausted in fact. 

Upon seeing his client’s eyes flutter open, David ended his call and slipped the phone into his breast pocket. Technically he wasn’t supposed to even have it in here, but no one had seen it yet. 

“How you feeling?” he asked, dragging a chair closer to the side of the bed. 

Adam sighed softly. “Ok I guess. How long was I out for?”

“You’d passed out back in the dressing room, they’ve got you lightly sedated now because you came to and got a bit difficult when they put the drip in. Jesus Christ Adam don’t ever scare me like that again. I thought you were going to die”

Adam looked sheepish, his cheeks colouring. “Sorry. I guess it just got a bit much”

“A bit much? Adam you had a massive anxiety attack.”

Adam didn’t know what to say to that, so he remained silent – fiddling absently with the corner of the blanket. David sighed. 

“Well we don’t want this happening again, so I’ve had a word to the label and they’ve agreed to halt everything so you can recover. As of right now you’re not to work, or sing or stress out”

Adam sat up. “What?”

“I mean it. We’ve cancelled your upcoming commitments. You have to rest now, and recover from this. The doctors said you’re exhausted Adam, and severely dehydrated. You’ve got to stay here for the rest of the night, and probably today before you’ll be released”

Adam frowned, hating the tightness that coiled in his throat. They couldn’t stop him from working – it was the only thing keeping him sane, the only thing that kept his mind off the stalker. He’d go bat-shit crazy if he didn’t have his work. 

“What about the stalker? I’m just supposed to sit here doing nothing while he’s out there watching me? If he can get into my god-damned dressing room he can get into my hospital room!” 

“He won’t. Right now there are two Police guards outside this room instructed to let no-one inside unless they’re on a specific list, or approved by you or me. You’re safe here Adam” David said, hating the fear he could see in the other man’s gaze. 

“What am I supposed to do after I’m discharged? Sit at home driving myself crazy thinking about all this? I need to do something to keep my mind occupied”

“I know, which is why I’ve arranged for you to spend some time at one of my houses out of state. We can get you out without any media coverage, which will be perfect. We want as small amount of exposure as possible”

“Fine” Adam sighed, having no real choice. He reached for the plastic cup of water on the rolling table and sucked it down, wincing as his stomach protested. 

“Your parents know what we’ve got planned for you, in fact Leila agreed to it, and while she was disappointed you wouldn’t be staying with her, she liked the idea of you going somewhere off the grid to recover. I know the perfect place too”

Adam nodded, too tired and sick to even bother arguing. He lay back on the soft pillows and listened to David talk some more before the sedative pulled him back under. Once he realised Adam had fallen asleep he took out his phone and settled himself in the chair in the hall, making sure everything would be organised before his client got there.


	3. 3

Adam was kept in hospital for most of the next day and given very strict orders not to exert himself in any way. Of course he wasn’t feeling well, so that wasn’t really a problem. The doctors said he was suffering from exhaustion and dehydration and Adam believed them – because right now he felt like he’d been hit by a truck, a large truck. 

Unfortunately though as he lay in bed he couldn’t help his mind from wandering back to how all this began. It had been an unremarkable day off for him, he’d been sitting at home with a cup of tea going through some fan mail his mother had sent over. Leila still handled a lot of his snail mail, and every so often she’d sent boxes of it over for him to peruse when he had the time. Sometimes she’d sit with him and they’d catch up, but on that particular day he was alone. 

As he sifted through the large cardboard box a letter toward the bottom of the pile caught his eye. It was written on plain white paper, and it took a moment for the words to register. 

We WeRe MEaNt TO be ToGETheR. I Love YoU ADAm. 

It was nothing vastly different from the masses of fan mail he received, but there was something about this letter that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Maybe it was the haphazard letters – they looked like the note a serial killer would leave behind when asking for a ransom. 

Adam had set the letter aside, believing it was nothing more than a particularly vehement fan. His fans were a passionate lot, and sometimes people struggled with boundaries. He still remembered his For Your Entertainment promotional tour when an older woman had shoved her number into his palm after declaring that ‘she wanted to make out with him real bad’. It was baffling really, the level of love people could have, and most of the time he found it flattering that people were so interested, but sometimes people needed to back off. 

He thought nothing more of that strange letter until the next week, when another letter arrived. This time it was enclosed with his personal mail, which had been held for a week while he’d done a gig in a neighbouring city. This time he was sitting at the breakfast bar in his home in LA when he noticed the letter. 

I Know YOU read MY Letter AdAM. I LOvE yOu. 

This time there was a small gift enclosed – a single lock of blonde hair. This time Adam didn’t ignore the prickles of fear that ran down his spine. Something was up. These sort of letters weren’t the norm. 

His concerns were proven when just two days after the second letter, he received another one. This time the letter came in a yellow A4 envelope and contained several photos of himself. They were black and white and very grainy – shot at close range and he was horrified to see pictures of the grounds of his house, and even one of him standing in the driveway next to his car. What the hell?

He’d shown David then, and security had been beefed up around him as the letters started coming thick and fast. There were gifts too, cologne and clothes and more disturbingly, a seemingly used condom. He’d nearly lost his lunch when he opened that particular letter. Fear became his near constant companion, and he went from his usual sociable self to a veritable hermit – locking himself away in his palatial home while he waited for the police to figure out who was stalking him. 

So far the Police had no leads on who was sending the sick letters and Adam stopped opening his fan mail all together. His mother started forwarding the boxes on to the cops so her son wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore. Unfortunately he stopped reading the positive letters too – which he’d always gotten a kick out of in the past. 

Sighing softly Adam rolled over in the bed, trying not to let his loneliness overtake him completely. So far David had only been to see him once, and that was just to tell him that his new ‘home’ was in order. Once he was discharged, (which would hopefully be this afternoon): he’d be on his way to whatever mystery town David had planned for him. Other than that, he’d had no visitors. 

All that was about to change though, as the whirlwind known as Leila Lambert had just pulled into the car park. She parked her white Lexus and adjusted her sunglasses as she marched into the foyer of the hospital. Adam’s manager had called her and told her of his plan, but she couldn’t let Adam disappear without seeing him first. After all, first-born children often held a special and coveted place in the hearts of their mothers. 

Leila loved both her children, but Adam had always held a special place in her heart. He’d struggled more than his younger brother Neil – had taken longer to find himself, and she’d hated those years. Being gay was never easy, especially in the music industry, but he really seemed to have found a place now, a special niche he could call his own. Of course Leila wanted to see him happy with a partner, but she wasn’t about to push things. Adam would find someone when he was ready. After all with a heart as big as his was, how could he not?

Once she got to her son’s room she was stopped by the rather large security officer who manned a clipboard and a pen officiously. 

“Name?” he asked, not bothering to cast her more than a cursory glance. 

Leila slipped her shades on top of her head. “I’m Leila Lambert. Adam’s mother”

Now the guard looked sheepish. “I’m sorry Ma’am, but we’ve been given strict instructions. We have to check everyone who comes into his room, just to make sure they’re on the list”

Leila smiled. “I know. You’re doing a great job. Can I go in?”

“Of course”

The room was dim as she entered but Adam was awake, staring listlessly at the television screen. He looked pale and washed out, and somewhat fragile lying there and she couldn’t help the rush of affection as she stepped closer. 

Adam turned and even in his exhaustion his face lit up. 

“Hi Mom” 

“Hey sweetie, how are you feeling?” Leila asked as she scooped him into her arms. 

“Like crap” Adam’s voice was muffled and he clung to her tightly. Leila was unsurprised to feel the warmth of tears on her shirt- front. 

“It’s ok honey, you’ll be ok” she said, rubbing his back. 

He nodded and brushed at his eyes as he pulled back, taking a shuddering breath. Leila brushed the hair off his forehead gently, hating to see him so upset. Adam was normally a very bright and bubbly young man. 

“You’ve just got to take some time to recover and you’ll be back in no time” she said after a while, perching on the side of his bed and handing him a tissue. 

“I know. Do you know where I’m going?”

“No honey, David hasn’t told me, probably because he knows I’ll fly to wherever it is to be with you”

Adam smirked and his eyes flashed. Just for a second Leila saw a glimpse of the old Adam – Glambert. 

“You’d totally do that Mama”

She chuckled. “I would. Do you know where you’re going?”

“No. David doesn’t tell me much right now, which is fine I don’t think I could deal with much more at the moment. All he says is that it’s one of his holiday homes”

“Must be rather wealthy then”

“Well I do pay him handsomely”

“Of course you do. Do you know when you’ll be discharged?”

Adam shrugged. “I’m not sure, hopefully this afternoon. I’m bored out of my fucking skull”

“Well you need to take it easy. I have a few boxes in the car of stuff that will keep you amused for however long you’re away”

“Mother I’m not going to read 50 shades of grey. Ever”

Leila’s cheeks coloured. “That’s not in there, but every other book that I’ve recommended to you over the years is, and I want you to read them”

“Ok. I’ll keep them in mind on those long and cold nights I’m sitting in front of the fire”

“Please look after yourself sweetie” Leila said gently after a moment. The seriousness of her words wasn’t lost on her son, who nodded solemnly. 

“I will. Promise”

Tears brimmed in Leila’s eyes as she moved forward to hug him again, gently holding the back of his head. She wished she could have gone with him, even just to keep him company but David had been adamant that Adam be sent somewhere unknown – just to keep the stalker away. 

Leila wasn’t ashamed to admit it, but Adam’s stalker frightened her. Not long after Adam had received those sick letters, she’d found one in her letterbox as well. She’d handed it straight to the Police and had hired a security team for added protection, but Adam had received the brunt of it. Letters, gifts, photo’s and strange unsettling phone calls had soon become the norm, and he’d suffered as a result. 

She only hoped they could sort this out quickly: because she hated to see her family hurting.


	4. 4

David’s ‘perfect’ place turned out to be the town of Conway in Arkansas. Adam thought it was a strange place to be sent to recover, but he did have to agree that it was somewhat out of the way. It definitely wasn’t somewhere he’d ever have thought himself spending a lot of time, simply because it was so far out of the way. 

The house he was set up in was spacious and airy, with hardwood floors and decorated in cool neutral colours with icy blue accents. While it wasn’t his own home, Adam was surprised to realise he could be comfortable here. Of course he didn’t know what to do with himself the minute the door closed behind him, but he’d deal with that later. 

Firstly he dragged his massive suitcase up the staircase to the master bedroom, ignoring his lingering weakness. He’d been kept in the hospital for two days receiving nutrients from the drip and hydrating himself before he was allowed to leave, and even now he still wasn’t 100 per cent. He was tired mostly, and still prone to weakness, but he was determined to get past it. This wouldn’t get to him. 

Even as he thought that though Adam realised it already had. That was the whole reason he was here wasn’t it? Because he’d worked himself into the ground, before freaking out in his manager’s arms. If he didn’t feel so worn down, he might have been embarrassed. As it was he was still worried about everything, even though David had told him to relax. He just didn’t see how it was possible. 

He still couldn’t really believe how easily David had managed to get him out of his commitments. On Friday of the same week he was to appear on GMA, as well as tape interviews for Ellen Degeneres and David Letterman. He also had a charity benefit to attend, as well as a pre-Grammy’s show, even though the nominations hadn’t come out yet. He wasn’t getting his hopes up. It would be amazing of course, but he didn’t want to be disappointed. 

Sighing softly Adam heaved the bag up onto the king bed and packed away the clothes and other belongings he’d brought with him. There was none of his usual leather or spikes, just denim and clothing of a more casual nature. After all he wasn’t here to perform, he was here to get some R and R. 

As he unpacked he checked out the room, appreciating the navy coverlet on the bed and the elegant wallpaper patterned with delicate silver fleur-de-lis. Lacy curtains framed a huge picture window that provided an amazing view of the surrounding countryside. That was another good thing about the house – it was out of the way. 

Once he’d filled the cupboards, he moved on to the bathroom, stocking the shelves with his usual array of products. The bathroom was all elegant dark marble counters with fancy silver faucets. The shower, he noted, was big enough for two, but he doubted he’d find any male company here to his liking, even though the accent was damn cute. 

All in all the house was elegant and comfortable all at once, but the minute he’d unpacked, Adam was bored. Restless he explored the kitchen and even found a juicer he could use, which was great. He’d missed his juice. He also missed being at home by himself, and now felt like he was rattling around in the empty space. Hotels were noisy, even in the penthouse suite on the top floor he was surrounded by noise –managers, handlers, band mates, all were constantly chatting and drinking and generally having a good time. 

Not now though, now he was utterly alone and already feeling it. Normally he didn’t mind being alone, but now it was taking some getting used to. 

Heading back downstairs, Adam set his iphone into the dock mounted on the bookcase and started some GoldFrapp – they always managed to soothe his nerves. Soon enough the cool mystic electronica sounds of ‘Hairy Trees’ filled the room and he drew in an appreciative breath as he rummaged in the cupboards for something to make for dinner. After a moment of searching he decided on a simple chicken salad with ice cold Pellegrino. 

It felt weird eating alone, he’d gotten so used to sharing his meal times with Tommy-Joe and Brian and the others, that it was odd hearing only one clink of cutlery. He didn’t have anyone to talk to, and for just a moment the crushing loneliness swept over him and he longed for companionship. The others were all on holidays though, David had organised some time off for them as well, and he couldn’t ruin their vacation time by butting in with his concerns. 

He amused himself for an hour or so in front of the television before his eyes grew heavy and he stumbled upstairs to the bathroom, luxuriating in the shower before he fell into bed, exhausted after a day of doing nothing. _Tomorrow will be better,_ he thought as he drifted off to sleep, tomorrow he’d find something to do.

***

Adam slept late the next day, and it was almost eleven when he finally rolled out of bed. Getting up so late was a luxury he didn’t often allow himself, but now that all his appointments had been cancelled, it didn’t really matter what time he got up.

It didn’t really matter that he spent almost 30 minutes in the shower either, he mused as he luxuriated under the warm spray. David had told him not to worry about the utilities, just to relax, and it had been ages since he’d used the shower for so long. Taking the time to glance around while he was in there, he realised just how thin he’d gotten. He’d struggled with his weight for his whole life, and to be at the point where he thought he was too thin was mind-boggling. He’d always carried a bit of extra fat around his waist, but now it was gone and he was whipcord thin. 

Green tea was next on the agenda and Adam found the pantry stocked with all his favourite (but seldom eaten) foods. There was plenty of fresh fruit, thick crusty sour dough bread, his favourite coffee and herbal teas and plenty of other things to tempt him. David had well and truly outdone himself. 

It wasn’t enough to keep him amused for long though, and after a breakfast of toast, eggs and piping hot Russian Caravan Tea, he decided to call his mother. She answered on the second ring. 

“Hi baby, how are you doing?” she asked, and despite himself Adam couldn’t help the way his throat tightened at the simple love and affection in his mothers voice. They’d always been close. 

“I’m ok, kinda bored but ok” he said, slumping back into the chocolate brown suede lounge and staring out the window at the surrounding greenery. 

“That’s good honey, I’m glad you’re taking it easy”

Leila’s short comment drew pause, and he sat up. 

“What’s up Mom? You sound odd”

She sighed and Adam’s heart fell. “It’s nothing sweetie, I don’t want you to worry”

“You got another one didn’t you?” Adam’s tone was dull and the hair on the back of his neck prickled. Why the fuck was this happening? Was it ever going to end?

“Adam don’t worry about it, you need to…”

“What did it say? Tell me Mom”

Leila sighed again and Adam’s heart constricted. This wasn’t going to be pleasant. 

“I don’t want to tell you sweetie, you’re under enough pressure already”

“Just spit it out” he demanded, stress making him snap. 

If she noticed her son’s tone Leila never commented on it. She knew he was too stressed about this, and she didn’t want to add more to the weight, but he needed to know, even if David had told her not to say anything to him. 

“It said, ‘you can’t keep him from me. I’ll find him eventually’”

Adam’s throat constricted and he felt molten fear slide down his spine, settling like a serpent coiled and ready to strike. He felt sick. How did this psycho know where he was? How did he even know where he’d gone? 

“Adam? You there?” his mother’s voice snapped him out of his terror. 

“Yeah, I’m here. What did the others say about it?” he asked, focussing his attention on a robin he could see perched on a tree branch outside the window. If he focussed on that for the moment he wouldn’t have to deal with everything else. 

“David said the police are working on it. Other than that I don’t know anything. I’m sorry honey. Please try not to let it get to you. Whoever is sending these out doesn’t know where you are, and we’d like to keep it that way. It’s going to be ok”

“How do you know that! This sicko has been watching me every damned day, I wouldn’t be surprised if I got a photo of myself getting on the fucking plane!” 

“Please don’t say that sweetie”

“You haven’t got one have you? Please tell me you haven’t” Adam said hollowly. 

“No! Oh God no”

“Good” he said faintly. 

Leila turned the conversation around to more mundane things then, determined to keep her son from worrying himself into the ground. David had given her strict instructions not to fly down to Conway to see him, he assumed the stalker knew Adam’s family members and having his mother suddenly turn up in a small town might raise too much suspicion. It was an awful truth, but while Adam didn’t sound too bad right now, Leila promised herself that she’d break all of David’s rules if she feared for Adam’s life. 

Adam felt horribly alone after they’d hung up, and he didn’t know what to do with himself. He wouldn’t have minded smoking a joint, just to escape from it all, but pot always made him horny and he just didn’t feel like jerking off right now. He hated to admit it but the stress had had an effect on his usually quite healthy sex-drive. Now he struggled to get it up. 

Maybe he should go out? Surely there was a decent mall in this town, and he felt sure that some retail therapy would set him right. So before he could talk himself out of it, (and before he could remind himself that being recognised was a bad thing for once), he got changed and jumped in the car.


	5. 5

Adam made it to the sliding doors of the local Whole Foods before he realised what he’d done. Shocked, he stood stock still for a moment while the glass doors slid open and closed repeatedly. He’d left the house, worse yet he’d left without telling anyone. Now Adam wasn’t one of those celebrities that let someone manage every aspect of their lives, but he did rely on David for a lot. Especially now with the stalker. 

_Maybe he shouldn’t have left the house after all,_ he thought as he stood just outside the door, warring with himself before someone bumped his shoulder. 

“Watch it” the older man said harshly, having no care at all for the struggling musician. 

Snapping himself out of his maddening thoughts, Adam took a breath and stepped inside, grabbing a small metal basket as he wandered off down one of the aisles. _This was a fucking supermarket for God’s Sakes, not a war zone._ Nobody knew he was in Arkansas: he needed to get over himself. 

Gradually he relaxed as he wandered the aisles, picking up certain items that took his fancy. Whole Food’s were all over America, and they had a similar layout in every store, so he didn’t struggle with finding his way around. Since the cupboards were so well stocked, he found himself looking more than buying, apart from the occasional box of Green Tea and a packet of chocolate cookies that had caught his eye. That should shut his mother up about his weight. 

He was so engrossed in his concerns that he wasn’t paying attention as he rounded the corner and was knocked off his feet, landing hard on his ass.

***

“Yes Mom I’ve got them. No I’m not far away, I’ll be back before you have to put the cake in the oven, promise”

Kristopher Allen loved his mother – he really did, but sometimes Kim was a bit much. She’d sent him on a last minute trip to the Whole Foods in order to get the eggs she’d forgotten for a cake she was in the middle of making. He’d only popped in to say hello to his new nephew after all, and now he was here, running around the supermarket like a headless chicken. 

It wasn’t his fault he’d gotten caught up with his new nephew. His brother and his wife Jess had welcomed their first child Zachary just the week before and this was the first chance Kris had really gotten to spend some quality time with the child. Of course Kris (as the baby of the family) was now subjected to the ‘grandchild’ talk from his parents, which had only intensified since the new arrival. Despite Kim and Neal’s obvious enthusiasm for children, he was in no rush. He really didn’t have time for a relationship right now anyway. 

Oh who was he kidding? He’d love to have someone in his life, but it had to be the right someone. Kris had had few boyfriends in his life, and his friends often said he was too picky for his own good. Kris liked to think he had standards though – and Conway had little to offer in the decent guy department. He wanted love, not a one night stand. He wanted that instant connection that stole your breath and made it hard to look away. 

Of course the last thing he expected, was to find that connection in a guy he bowled over in the produce aisle. 

“Oh jeez I’m sorry!” he cried as he sat up, gulping a bit when he caught sight of who he’d knocked over. 

“It’s fine, are you ok?” the other man asked as he reached for his fallen groceries. 

“Yeah, are you?” Kris asked, handing him a package of green tea. 

The other guy nodded. “Yeah, it’s fine. No worries”

Kris gulped again as their eyes locked for a second – the longest second of his life. This guy was attractive, classically masculine with a strong jaw and cornflower eyes and full sensuous lips. Despite his height he was thin and pale, and there was an almost nervous energy around him. 

“I’m Kris” he said after a moment, running a hand through his hair. 

“Adam”

“Can I buy you a cup of coffee? Least I could do seeing as how I knocked you over” Kris asked, a little shocked he was being so bold. He didn’t know what it was about this guy – Adam – those blue eyes of his held secrets that he wanted to know. 

Adam paused, torn at what to do. While it was true he’d all but recovered from his minor anxiety attack, he still wasn’t sure it was a good idea to hang around in public. He didn’t want to sound arrogant, but people tended to recognise him. David had told him to keep a low profile – but Kris’s warm gaze and his slightly lopsided grin were awfully tempting. 

Kris chewed his lip then smiled apologetically. “Hey, don’t worry about it. You don’t even know me. It’s cool, forget I said anything”

Adam managed a smile, but it felt fake. God he’d never been this indecisive in his whole life! _Go and have a fucking cup of coffee with this cutie-pie. Do it now Lambert, before he walks away._

He was just about to speak up with Kris’s cell rang, and the moment was lost as he turned away to answer it. Adam roughly grabbed his basket and went off down the aisle again, cursing his inability to get over himself.


	6. 6

“Did you get those eggs honey?” Kimberly Allen called as she heard the front door open. 

“Yep, here you go” Kris said, handing them over. Kim pecked his cheek before she got back to making her cake. Kris had taken a little longer than she’d thought, but the mixture still looked good. 

Kris wandered off into the living room after that, wondering if Daniel was still here. 

“They went home about 20 minutes ago” his father Neal answered from behind his newspaper. 

“Oh right” he mumbled, feeling strangely out of sorts. That guy – Adam had sure been something, but he still couldn’t help but feel kind of embarrassed that his rather bold attempt at a pick up had fallen flat. He didn’t often take the lead with other men, but there was something in Adam’s gaze that compelled him to give it a shot. 

It had gotten him nowhere in the end, but at least he’d tried. Maybe he’d see Adam around town. He doubted it though, Adam looked nothing like the usual guys in town, and the Gucci label on the back of his trendy jeans only solidified his notion that he was from out of town. Typical. 

“You staying for dinner honey?” Kim called. 

“Nah, think I might head off. Um, I’ll see you round” Kris answered, grabbing his sunglasses off the table and heading back outside. He had his own small apartment in the next suburb over. 

Once he got home though he didn’t really know what to do with himself. His mind kept wandering to thoughts of Adam, which was just plain silly. He’d barely said two words to him, and then his pick up attempt had failed. Best to just put it out of his mind and get on with things. 

He couldn’t though – and all afternoon his mind was filled with Adam’s haunted eyes, and the secrets they withheld.

***

_You’re a fucking moron Adam, all he wanted was a drink! Get your head out of your ass and stop being a diva._

Meanwhile across town Adam was driving himself crazy thinking of the cutie with the brown eyes. Kris had seemed like a genuinely nice guy, who’d obviously been interested in him. So why couldn’t he have just accepted his offer? 

_Because you’re an idiot. You’re so concerned with being recognised that you’re missing out on actual human contact,_ he thought viciously. 

Sadly it was true in a way. The Stalker had all but reduced him to a hermit ever since those photo’s had started arriving. So far the Stalker had managed to catch him in his own yard, standing by his car and the most frightening of all – standing naked in his bathroom. His groin had been obscured by the tall trees outside his window: but you could tell he was nude. It made him sick, and very hesitant to appear in public. Especially now that he’d all but broken down in David’s arms. 

Adam sighed and lay back on the lounge, staring at the ceiling. He really needed to get over himself, and he was loath to admit just how scared he was. He was down here in Conway by himself after all, what if something happened? Maybe he needed to have a friendly face, just so he wouldn’t feel so alone. 

Sighing again Adam grabbed a baseball cap and his sunglasses off the hall table and headed out, needing to get out of the house despite his concerns. If he didn’t get out now he was going to go stir-crazy. Some fresh air would do him good. 

He’d just rounded the corner into a nice park when he was knocked over for the second time that day. 

“Really!” he exclaimed angrily as he sat up, his expression softening as he realised a large German Sheppard had been the one to hit him. 

“Hey boy, whatcha doing?” he asked the animal, scratching it’s ears. 

“Nemo! Seriously!” an all too familiar voice called, and Kris jogged into view, holding an empty leash. 

Adam chuckled to himself and continued patting the dog, his grin broadening at the look of shock written across Kris’s face. 

“Oh lord, Adam I’m so sorry” he said, snapping the leash on Nemo and helping Adam to his feet. 

“It’s ok, but we’ve got to stop meeting like this” 

Kris chuckled. “Yeah, Nemo come here will you?”

“That’s um, an interesting name for such a big dog” Adam commented, brushing off his jeans. 

“I named him after Captain Nemo, because he’s always exploring and getting into trouble, aren’t you?” Kris said, scratching Nemo’s ears. 

“Good name”

Kris bashfully touched a hand to the back of his neck. “So you think you could come have that coffee with me now?”

This time Adam didn’t hesitate. “Sure”

***

Kris led the way back down the main street to a small café where they grabbed a table out the front. Nemo (who seemed to have taken a liking to Adam), sprawled at his feet as the two men ordered coffees.

“So what do you do Kris?” Adam asked once their drinks arrived, sipping his latte appreciatively. The bright sun cast blue highlights in his ebony hair and made his skin luminous. He really was a very attractive man. 

“Well I just finished my degree in music last month. I really want to be a composer, like do movie scores and stuff like that. Right now I’m teaching music to a few kids around town until I find a steady job. What about you?”

“I’m a singer”

Kris’s eyes widened. “Really? Wow that’s great. Where do you sing?”

Adam didn’t really know what to say to that, so he took another sip of coffee before he answered. “Well I play all different kinds of places, a couple months ago I was Shanghai, and before that I was in Kiev with Queen”

Kris’s mouth was open now. “Are you serious?”

Adam nodded. “Deadly”

Kris blew out a breath and ran a hand though his hair. Adam hoped he hadn’t turned him off. 

“What’s your last name?”

“Lambert, I’m Adam Lambert”

Kris leaned closer. “I’ve heard of you. What are you doing all the way out here in Conway?”

Adam shifted uncomfortably, unwilling to voice the whole truth. Not yet anyway. “I’m here for a holiday. Needed some R and R”

Kris sat back, sipping his coffee. “Fair enough, I guess Conway is out of the way enough for someone as famous as you”

Adam nodded and took a breath, not really knowing what to say now. Telling someone you were a celebrity always tended to make things awkward, and he hated the wall that had risen between them. Kris seemed sweet and genuine – he probably didn’t want anything to do with him now. 

“What are your plans for tomorrow?” Kris asked after a while. The waitress walked past again and he ordered a slice of cheesecake with two forks. 

“Nothing” Adam said, surprised and touched when Kris moved his chair closer and handed him a fork. 

“Want to go see a movie?” Kris grinned around his mouthful, which forced a surprised little laugh from Adam’s lips. He took a forkful of cake. 

“Sure”


	7. 7

Kris was kind of nervous the next day – after all it wasn’t every day that one went out with a celebrity. But he told himself that it wasn’t a date, just a couple of guys hanging out together. It didn’t matter that Adam was hot, and sweet, and funny…

_Stop it,_ Kris told himself firmly as he drove through town. There was something about Adam that intrigued him, he seemed gentle and Kris didn’t want to frighten him off by coming on too strong. They’d hang out first, then see what happened. 

Of course simply ‘hanging out’ would be hard enough, especially when he caught sight of a casually dressed Adam leaning against the wall of the cinema complex. He looked effortlessly cool in tight black denim jeans and a grey tee with expensive looking sunglasses atop his hair. 

“Hi” he said brightly, giving him a warm smile as they headed inside. 

“Hey, so what should we see?” Kris asked as they went to the queue and stared up at the list of films. 

“I’m not sure, what are you in the mood for?” Adam’s eyes were trained on the list, but Kris could feel his warm solid presence. It was nice. 

“There’s that new Tom Cruise movie out? Might be a bit of mindless action”

“Ok, sounds good” 

They bought their tickets and a large popcorn to share before hunkering down in the dark theatre. Kris kind of wished they were a couple just so he could kiss Adam in the back row. Mhmm, that’d be nice. 

Adam sighed softly and slid down in his chair so he could rest his head on the back of it – squeezing his 6 foot frame into small chairs was something he was used to. He could hear Kris crunching away on the popcorn and suddenly it was very funny. 

“What?”

“Give me that” Adam laughed, plunking the box in his lap. He didn’t eat any, but at least he could hear properly. Plus it meant Kris had to wriggle closer just to get his hand in the box. Bonus. 

Unfortunately though the movie wasn’t very good – despite Tom’s performance, and Adam soon grew bored. Ignoring the glare from the woman sitting on his other side, he took his phone out and checked Twitter, a little shocked to see it abuzz with news and speculation regarding his whereabouts. It was baffling – some reports even had him in the Bahamas supposedly relaxing on a banana lounge. 

He decided against sending a tweet, preferring to maintain his anonymity for as long as possible. He had to admit it was really nice to be able to walk down the street or to loiter outside a cinema without having a camera thrust in his face. He’d only been here a little under a week and he already felt better, lighter. 

“Are you bored?” Kris whispered, his face illuminated by the glow of the iphone. 

“Yeah, but it’s ok” Adam said, stretching his legs and slipping the phone back into his pocket. Kris’s shoulder was at the perfect height, but he resisted the urge to rest his head on it at first – then his eyelids started drooping and he couldn’t resist anymore.

***

Kris was a little shocked when he felt Adam’s head on his shoulder, then he cracked a smile. Maybe he was starting to break though the singer’s carefully constructed barrier. He’d done a little Googling the night before and discovered quite a lot about Adam, and just how famous he really was. Kris couldn’t believe he was sitting next to someone who’d been nominated for a Grammy.

A Grammy-nominated artist who was currently asleep on his shoulder, he might add. Carefully so as not to disturb him, Kris draped his arm over the back of the chair, giving Adam a little more room. It felt nice to be this close, Adam’s hair was soft on his arm, his breath warm on his neck. Kris couldn’t help but feel arousal wash through him. 

It was hard to concentrate on the film after Adam fell asleep, and if Kris was honest, he didn’t really watch it at all – he spent most of his time watching Adam sleep. It was very intimate watching someone sleep – Adam looked vulnerable and very sweet, his lashes casting dark fans over his cheeks. 

“Hey, it’s over” he whispered once the credits started rolling. Gently he shook Adam’s leg. 

“Oh sorry” Adam mumbled, wiping his face as the lights came on. 

“It’s ok, you must have needed it” Kris said as they made their way back outside. He slipped his sunglasses on, always blinded by the sun after sitting in the dark for so long. 

“So did you enjoy it?” Adam asked sheepishly as they started walking off back down the street. The sun felt good on his face and it was nice to have someone to talk to. 

“Eh, it wasn’t that good. I got kind of distracted”

“Sorry” Adam said again, his cheeks colouring slightly. 

Kris bumped his shoulder. “It’s totally fine, if I had a dime for every time a hot guy fell asleep on my shoulder…I’d be pretty poor, cause it doesn’t happen much. Trust me, I don’t mind”

Adam laughed and Kris felt his heart lift – Adam’s mirth was infectious. 

“So you think I’m hot huh?”

Now Kris’s cheeks flushed. “I do”

Adam smiled gently. “Feeling’s mutual”


	8. 8

Adam spent the new few days trying not to think too hard about Kris Allen. Seeing as how he had little to do with himself – that task was proving rather difficult. Kris seemed sweet, so what was his problem? He wasn’t sure, and being sweet wasn’t enough to convince him right now. 

It had been nice when Kris hadn’t run screaming into the hills when he’d found out about his celebrity status, (but it should be noted that not many people ran screaming from him). It had been nice having someone to hang out with, but Adam had never expected to feel the first gentle stirrings of attraction. It had been a long time since Adam had felt attracted to anyone. 

He couldn’t ignore it though – their chemistry was great, hanging out with Kris was easy and just plain nice. It was funny, but since the stalker Adam had struggled to make new friends – something he’d never had any trouble doing in the past. He was always the one people tended to flock to at parties, but not so much anymore. 

That thought depressed him a bit: he liked parties and sharing a few drinks with friends. But now he was simply too wary. The last thing he wanted was for photos of his various friends to circulate the web: and the intensely intimate nature of the Stalkers pictures was a truly frightening thing. He didn’t want his friends to ever feel the way he did now. 

Sighing, Adam rolled over in bed and shut his eyes, determined to push Kris out of his mind. He didn’t need to start worrying about him, not when he had so many other things occupying his mind. But as usual his body wouldn’t listen, and surprisingly he felt his dick twitch. 

_Well hello there, haven’t heard from you in a while,_ Adam thought, keeping his eyes closed as he took himself in hand. He blew out an appreciative breath as he stroked himself, he hadn’t done this for a long time, hadn’t even felt the urge. Now he couldn’t seem to stop himself, his mouth opening in a silent scream as his hand quickened, imagining Kris’s lips stretched around his length, the warm rough feel of his tongue licking the head. It was heavenly. 

After a few more frenzied strokes he climaxed, shuddering out a breathless moan as come covered his hand and stomach. 

“Holy crap” he mumbled once he’d recovered, reaching over to grab a tissue. That hadn’t happened in a while. Man it felt good, and he tried not to think too hard about the fact that it was Kris who got him all hot and bothered, with those delicious looking lips and liquid chocolate eyes. Amazingly he felt himself harden again. 

“Seriously? You go for fucking months without anything, and you want to go again?” he chuckled, realising how stupid he looked talking to his dick.

Rolling his eyes he scrambled out of bed and padded naked into the living room, thankful the blinds were drawn. The neighbours didn’t need to see his naked ass strutting around the place. Grabbing his phone off the desk he scrolled through it until he found Kris’s number, (added just in case they wanted to hang out again). 

Hmm, he liked Kris, he really did. He didn’t seem to want anything from him other than the pleasure of his company and that made for a refreshing change. Adam was so used to people constantly demanding things from him – “Just one more moment Mr Lambert” or “Just one more autograph”. It was exhausting. 

But Kris? He was sweet, and Adam was starting to think that sweet wasn’t too bad after all.

***

Across town Kris was having a similar struggle, although struggle wasn’t the right word. If he was honest with himself, he’d started to feel something for Adam – which was silly because they’d hardly spent any time together. They hadn’t even kissed yet, but there was something about him that warmed Kris’s heart.

Smiling to himself he picked up his phone, staring at Adam’s number for a bit. It had been a couple of days since their trip to the movies, maybe he should call him again? 

_Hey Adam…are you free this afternoon? – K_

Well at least he’d sent it, and he could stop thinking about it. Maybe he was coming on too strong? No, he didn’t think so, after all they’d both admitted that they thought the other was attractive. Why not try for more?

He jumped when his phone buzzed, and he snatched it up. 

_Not busy. What did you have in mind? ☺ - A_

Kris smiled and glanced out the window at Nemo, who was staring at him morosely. He really needed a walk, but he didn’t want to be lame. Adam probably wouldn’t want to do something so mundane, would he? Only one way to find out. 

_Well Nemo really needs a walk. I’m sure he’d like to get a walk from a rockstar – K_

Oh God why did you say that? Kris rolled his eyes and threw the phone onto the bed, fully expecting Adam to ignore him. 

“Way to be cool Kris” he mumbled, glaring at the ceiling. Hopefully Adam would realise he was being a dork – something Danny always said he was good at. Needless to say, he was surprised when his phone chirped again.

_Love to. Come pick me up? I’m at 224 Parade Drive – A_

_Sure. See you in 20 – K_

“Come on Nemo, let’s go see your new friend” Kris called as he grabbed a light jacket and slipped his phone into his pocket along with his wallet and keys. Nemo bounded around happily but obediently followed his Master as they went out to the car, the two of them equally excited to see their new friend.


	9. 9

_Crap, why did you give him your address? You need to keep to yourself out here, you don’t know this guy, he could be anyone, he could be your stalker for all you know! Great, just call and cancel before he gets here…_

Adam ran his hands through his hair as he paced the hallway, berating himself for caving and giving Kris his home address. _No, Kris is a nice guy, you’re not an idiot – you didn’t get any creepy vibes off this guy, just chill Lambert, chill._

“God you’re an idiot, get a grip!” he told himself sternly as he marched into the bedroom to get dressed. His earlier arousal had worn off to reveal the thin layer of barely disguised fear that was always beneath the surface. He was so used to feeling this way now that he really didn’t know how to change it. 

After a quick shower he changed into faded denim jeans and a black tee, slipping on comfy sneakers as he peered out the window. The house had a long drive but no security gate, and was set back from the road amidst heavy greenery. Tall leafy trees lined the drive and also obscured the windows of the front rooms and bedroom, which made for a comforting atmosphere. The courtyard out the back of the house was well hidden too – in fact the whole house was the perfect hideaway. 

Adam stayed rooted to the window until he saw Kris’s blue pickup trundling down the drive, Nemo sitting in the tray. He loosed a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding when he saw Kris’s relaxed expression and the casual wave he shot his way as he parked and jumped out, letting Nemo sniff around in the grass for a bit. Typically, Nemo cocked his leg, marking his territory. 

“Hey Adam, sorry bout him, again” Kris said apologetically as Adam came down the drive. 

“It’s ok” Adam said, still a bit tense. God he really needed to relax. Fucking calm down, Kris is here now, get a grip!

“Are you ok? You look a bit pale” Kris asked, pulling Nemo away from the front flowerbeds. 

Adam let loose another breath and rolled his eyes at himself. “Yeah, I’m…good. Sorry, um…shall we go?”

Kris’s face relaxed, but he still looked faintly concerned. Strangely, Adam found it sweet that Kris was worried about him, he didn’t get any of the condescension that was usually evident in the faces of those around him. It was nice. 

“Sure. We could head back into town to the park, or we could take one of the walking trails that are around here. You’re not far from them actually, only about a five minute drive”

“Sounds good. Lead on” Adam said, making sure he had his keys before jumping into the passenger seat of the pickup. Kris had the radio tuned to a country station, which normally would have grated on his nerves, but he found it oddly soothing as they drove to a small parking lot about five miles down the road from the house. There weren’t any other cars there. 

“Ok, I’m guessing we should take the intermediate trail, just cause you’re probably fitter than me, and can keep up with knucklehead here” Kris said, ruffling Nemo’s fur. ‘

Adam chuckled. “Cool”

Kris led the way to the trail and they set off, wandering through the lush woods undisturbed, Nemo’s footsteps and panting their only accompaniment. As they walked Adam found himself relaxing, the cool air washing over his face and Kris’s unruffled company calming his unsteady nerves. He’d never met anyone like Kris before – he was such a calm guy, he didn’t think anything would ever ruffle him. 

“So how come you picked Conway for a holiday?” Kris asked after they’d been walking for about ten minutes. 

Adam shrugged. “It’s out of the way, nice and quiet I guess”

“It’s quiet all right, not a whole lot of stuff here. Good luck finding a gay bar here, you’ll probably have to go into Little Rock”

“I’m not here for the night life, really I just need some time to recover a bit” Adam said truthfully. 

“Recover? Are you sick?” Kris sounded concerned again. 

Adam chewed his lip, debating on whether to tell Kris the real problem. 

“I um…collapsed recently, after a show. Overdid it and had to go to hospital, my manager decided to send me out here for a break”

“Oh I’m sorry, I hope you’re doing better now” The concern in Kris’s voice surprisingly made Adam’s throat tighten and he felt the warmth of tears behind his eyes. _Stop it, stop your snivelling right now._

“Yeah, I think so” Adam blushed at the quaver in his voice. 

Kris stopped then, and placed a hand on Adam’s arm, which was just about enough to make Adam loose it completely. He bit his lip hard to keep from making a sound as Kris gently rubbed his arm, blinking through tears as he watched Kris step away to secure the dog before he came back. There was no judgment in those warm brown eyes as Kris stood with him. 

“Come here” Kris murmured after a second, and before he could protest, before he could say he was _fine,_ Kris embraced him, slipping his arms around him and holding him close. 

“I’m…” Adam stammered, his voice shaky again. 

“I know,” Kris whispered, “I know”

Adam couldn’t hold his tears back then, and he cried softly as Kris continued to hold him, running his hands soothingly down Adam’s shoulders and back, gentling him as if he were a skittish horse. 

After a little while they sank to the ground, heedless of the dirt on their jeans. Kris handed Adam a tissue from his back pocket and kept his arm around him as he dried his cheeks, his hand a warm soothing presence. He didn’t push, just waited for Adam to talk. 

“Sorry, I’ve been all over the place these days” Adam said, his voice thick. 

“It’s ok, I’m sure you’ve got lots to deal with. Sounds like you needed that break huh?” Kris said, lightly brushing Adam’s hair back from his forehead. 

Adam nodded. “Yeah. Thanks Kris, you’ve been great. I mean I don’t even know you and you’ve already put up with…this”

Kris smiled and held him close. “It’s totally fine, you’ve got nothing to worry about”

Nemo whined then, and slipped his collar before he came over to them, licking at Adam’s damp cheeks and crawling into his lap. Adam laughed softly and hugged the animal, soaking up the unconditional love. 

“Sneaky dog” Kris mumbled, huffing out a laugh. 

Adam continued to pet Nemo and relaxed back into Kris’s arms. Despite the height difference, they fit together perfectly, their limbs instinctively knowing how to arrange themselves. Although he was a good deal shorter than Adam, Kris’s arms were still able to hold him just perfectly. 

“Thank you” Adam whispered again, tilting his head so he could see Kris’s face. They were close enough to kiss: he could feel Kris’s warm sweet breath on his cheek. 

Gently Kris traced his cheekbone. “What for?”

Adam sighed softly and leant up to kiss him, their lips moulding together just as easily as the rest of their bodies. Kris tasted faintly of mint and he hummed softly as their tongues met, licking and moving together gently. 

“For this” Adam said once they’d broken apart. 

Kris smiled and bent to kiss him again, and Adam surrendered – resting against him and listening to the gentle breeze as it moved through the trees, feeling at peace for the first time in a long time.

***

The drive back to Adam’s house was spent in companionable silence, their hands joined over the console. Adam was still quiet, still a bit off, but he felt a whole lot lighter than he had before he’d left the house, and he knew he had Kris to thank for that: Nemo too, if he thought about it.

He didn’t want to think about it anymore though – he felt like he’d wasted enough of his time in worrying about whether or not to get closer to the other man. The last two hours they’d spent together had all but washed away any remaining doubt, now he just wanted to revel in it. He hadn’t expected to find anyone out here. 

“Thanks for this afternoon Kris” he said once they’d arrived. 

Kris shook his head and hugged him again, reaching up to kiss him softly. It was only a tentative kiss, like he wasn’t sure if it would be accepted, but Adam cupped his cheeks and deepened the kiss, telling him without words that yes, this was what he wanted. What they both wanted. 

“Will I see you tomorrow?” Kris asked once they’d broken apart to breathe. 

“Sure, do you want to do lunch somewhere? You’d have a better idea than me” Adam said, his hands making lazy circles on Kris’s back. It was comforting, this lazily intimate touch, and while there was passion there, it was slow burning and intense, kindling deep inside him. 

“Um, there’s a good barbeque place in town, great ribs. Want me to pick you up?” Kris almost sighed in contentment at Adam’s touch. 

“Ok, I’m sure David left me a car somewhere, I just haven’t found it yet” Adam chuckled, thinking how strange it felt to not have a car immediately available. In LA he drove almost everywhere. 

“No worries, I’ll come round at 12:30 then”

“Ok” Adam said, tilting Kris’s face up for another kiss. He loved the way Kris melted against him, the way his hands rested on his hips. 

“See you then” Kris said, as he reluctantly pulled away and headed back to his truck, absently patting Nemo’s head before he slammed the door shut. Was it Adam’s imagination, or did he see Kris give himself a little shake? 

Adam grinned as he went back inside, already thinking ahead to their lunch date tomorrow. Man he was glad Kris had knocked him over in the Whole Foods.


	10. 10

“So do you know how long you’ll be staying out here?” Kris asked the next day over lunch. The restaurant he’d picked was quiet that day, which gave them a decent chance to talk. He hadn’t pushed Adam for information on what was stressing him out so much – Adam would tell him when he was ready, but instead chose to be a part of the solution, in relaxing him even further. 

Adam shrugged and set down his tumbler of iced tea. He looked (as usual) awesome, and Kris felt very lucky to have him at the same table. Of course he also felt lucky knowing he’d probably be making out with him in just a few short hours. 

“I’m not sure. I wasn’t given any real time frame, just told to ‘get better’”

“Huh” Kris said, taking a bite of his meal. Right now he was internally debating the pro’s and con’s of taking things further with Adam, and the unknown time frame was a pretty decent sized con. 

“Hey, we’ll work it out” Adam said, reaching over to hold his hand. 

Kris smiled and squeezed his fingers. “Yeah. It’s cool, don’t worry bout me”

“I do – well not worry, but I think about you a lot” Adam admitted, setting his knife and fork on his now empty plate. Kris had been right, the ribs here were great, and he’d forgone the luxury of adding to his waistline in order to sample them. 

“I think about you too, probably more than is healthy” Kris chuckled, his cheeks colouring faintly. 

Adam laughed softly and sat back in his chair, glancing around the room. Not once today had he thought about his stalker, he and Kris had been chatting the whole time they’d been here, and his mind had been occupied. It shocked him a bit – that he could be so easily distracted, but he was starting to trust the other man. 

“Want to go for a drive?” Kris asked. 

“Sure” Adam said, following Kris back out to the truck. The streets were quiet this time of afternoon and they rode with the windows down, catching the last of the summer breeze as they headed out of town. Winter’s chilly fingers were already in the air, especially at night now, and Adam wasn’t quite used to the temperature yet. 

Kris drove through town and headed out onto the highway, finally pulling into a car park at a place called Lake Conway. At 6 700 feet it was one of Conway’s largest lakes, and boasted excellent fishing. When he was younger Kris had often come here with his brother and father, and they’d caught many fish. But today he wasn’t here to fish, he was here to relax. 

“Are we going swimming? Because I didn’t bring appropriate attire” Adam joked as he followed Kris down a gravel path to the trees. Kris reached back and took hold of his hand, pulling him close for a moment. 

“Only locals know about this way down to the lake. We’ve been coming here for years, and in my opinion it’s the best little spot” 

Adam smiled, touched. As they picked their way along the side of the water, he pictured Kris as a boy, sitting in silent concentration as he tried to catch a fish. It was a pretty cute image and he held tightly to his hand as they followed the water line, finally reaching a clearing a few meters back from the waters edge. 

Massive trees swayed gently in the breeze and Adam breathed in the clean fresh air. Perfect. 

Kris pulled him close once they’d sat down and Adam hummed softly as their lips met, slipping his arm around the smaller man. Their kisses still held that slow intimacy, but the burning edge of passion was creeping in, and Adam’s once dormant libido was waking up. Right now, after just moments of gentle kissing, his cock was hard in his jeans, but he was quite content to keep doing what he was doing. The time would come for that, he was sure. 

Kris settled down on the ground, pulling Adam with him so he could stare up into his face. His own desire was coiled low in his belly, his dick hard, but like Adam he was content to take things slow. Gently, almost reverently he traced Adam’s nose and eyebrow, as if memorising his features, before moving him down so he could rest on his chest. Lazily he ran his fingers through Adam’s hair. 

“We can come back out here and fish at some point, if you want”

Adam scrunched his nose. “I’ve never fished in my life, somehow the thought of sticking a poor worm on a hook grosses me out”

Kris laughed and Adam smiled as he felt the vibrations in his cheek. Kris treated him so gently he found it oddly pleasant to submit and be the more passive partner, normally he was the more dominant one. But Kris treated him like he was a treasure, and Adam so badly needed that. 

“Maybe we can head out to the other lakes and go for a swim before it gets too cold then?”

“You don’t swim on this lake?” Adam asked, watching a small boat bob on the water. 

“No, too many eels and critters. I know someplace else we can swim”

“Critters? Huh, I love that word”

Kris chuckled and stared up at the sky. Never had he imagined he’d feel so close to Adam, but right then it felt like they were the one person. Sure Adam had secrets that were obviously taking a toll on his body, but Kris felt sure he would reveal them eventually – and he was determined to treat Adam with the respect and love he deserved. 

“Gonna be dark soon” he noted after a while, his arms pulling Adam closer when he shivered. 

“Better be heading off soon then” Adam said, sounding equally reluctant to leave. 

“In a minute – I don’t want this moment to end yet” Kris said, pressing a kiss to Adam’s forehead. 

Adam grinned and cuddled closer, breathing in Kris’s comforting scent. He didn’t want to leave yet either – his big house seemed awfully empty now. 

“Me neither” he whispered, his eyes trained on the sky, watching as the stars twinkled to life.

***

Back in Los Angeles the music world was abuzz with news of singer Adam Lamberts sudden and mysterious disappearance. Where had the glamorous musician gone? Some reports had him hiding out in the Bahamas, while others had him back in his home town, or even worse, rehab.

His mother Leila had been seen around the streets going about her business like normal: and steadfastly refusing to answer any questions about her son. She didn’t look particularly stressed, which the paparazzi took as a good sign, and she hadn’t been seen around any of the popular rehab clinics. So where was Adam?

One person who felt particularly close to the star, was Jeremy Styles. He’d been following Adam for quite a while now, and truly believed he could be of help to the star. It didn’t matter to Jeremy that his many letters and gifts had gone unanswered, all that mattered was that Adam know how much he meant to him. 

But of course he had to be careful about these things – he didn’t want to get picked up by the police, especially when he used the high -powered lens on his camera to snap pictures of the star. He wanted to let Adam know just how close he felt to him, he wanted to show Adam just how easily he could fit into his life. 

It hadn’t been hard to acquire the camera: in fact he’d had it months ago, so there could be no paper trail that would lead back to him. He was too smart for that. His letters to Adam arrived with no post mark and in plain yellow Manilla envelopes. No-one could connect him to Adam in any way, - which was just fine with him. 

Right now he wasn’t sure where Adam was either, like the rest of the music industry he was concerned about the star, but he would bide his time, he’d wait until Adam exposed himself, then he’d be there. They had to be together, they had to. For him there was no one else on the world, save for Adam. 

No one else.


	11. 11

“So how’s everything going down there?” 

Adam sighed softly and lay back on the lounge, staring out the window, the phone pressed to his ear. His mother had called and they’d been chatting for the last hour while he lay in the living room staring at the front yard, or more accurately wondering if he should tell his mother about Kris. 

“What? What’s the matter?” Ever the perceptive mother, Leila immediately picked up on her son’s reluctance. She hoped he was doing ok down there. 

“Nothing, everything is fine” Adam said, watching the rain slick down the window. There was something oddly soothing about watching rain drops run down the glass. 

“Hmmm”

“Ok fine, I think I’ve met someone, that’s all”

“You think you’ve met someone?”

Adam rolled his eyes. “I have met someone. His name is Kris and he’s…awesome”

Leila took a moment before she replied. “That’s great honey”

Adam nodded, even though he knew she couldn’t see him. “It is, he’s such a nice guy I really like him. Why don’t you sound happy about this?”

Now Leila sighed. “I’m happy for you sweetie, really. It’s great you’ve made a friend down there. I’m just concerned is all”

“Why are you concerned? Being with Kris makes me happy, and I’m pretty sure that’s a good thing right now, with…everything else going on”

“I know, but how well do you know him Adam? You’ve only been wherever you are for a month now, it’s not a very long time to build a solid trust base with anyone really”

“Have you been watching Dr Phil again? Mom I feel good when I’m with Kris, we’ve gotten really close this last month but he doesn’t know everything that’s going on. I’d like to tell him, but I don’t think I’m ready yet. He makes me feel great, I don’t think of any of the shit that’s going on when I’m with him”

“That’s great. Just be careful is all I’m saying. Do you trust this man?”

Adam sighed. “Yeah, or at least I’m starting to. He’s been a saint: he hasn’t pushed or put any pressure on me to tell him what’s going on. I know it’s been a long time since I’ve been with anyone, but I’d actually forgotten how nice it is. I’m good Mom”

“I’m glad you’re feeling good honey, really you have no idea how nice it is to hear that. I just want you to be careful”

“I will, it’s fine, everything is fine Mom, try not to worry. I’m feeling better than I have in a while. Now I gotta run. I’ll talk to you later ok?”

“Alright honey, have a good day”

“Bye Mom” Adam said, then tossed the phone onto the end table. He sighed softly and stared out the window again, wondering what Kris was up to. Their plans for the day had been cancelled due to the rain, Kris had said something about taking him zip-lining in a place called Ponca, but the rain had put an end to that idea. 

Rolling over onto his stomach, Adam picked up his phone again and dialled Kris’s now familiar number. Over the past month they’d grown rather close, but hadn’t yet taken that last step toward true intimacy. 

Kris took a moment to pick up and sounded a little breathless when he did. 

“Hey Adam, what’s up?”

Adam smiled. “I could ask you the same question, what’s got you so breathless?”

“Oh just watching some Walking Dead, what are you doin?”

“Sitting around scratching my butt, wanna come over?”

Kris chuckled. “Sure. Want me to bring fixings for dinner?”

Adam smiled, loving the quaint words that sometimes slipped into Kris’s speech. His accent was damn cute too. 

“Sounds good. See you soon then?”

“You will, bye now”

***

The rain had intensified by the time Kris arrived, and he ran inside quickly handing a plastic bag of dinner supplies to Adam as he stamped his boots on the doormat.

“Wow it’s really raining out here” Adam noted, shivering slightly in the cool night air. As a California boy he hadn’t seen heavy driving rain like this, sure it rained, but not quite like this. 

“Yep, looks like it’s gonna set in too” Kris said, taking the bag back as he followed Adam into the house. He hadn’t seen the interior of the fancy house where Adam was living, but if it was anything like the outside, then he was in for a treat. 

“Wow, nice digs” he said, glancing around the spacious living room. Even though Adam had been confined to the house for most of the time, it wasn’t messy, there was a big crate of what looked to be books sitting against the wall that Adam was trying to get through as well as other things of his, an iphone, a pair of stylish boots and a glass of water. 

“Yeah” Adam said, only slightly nervous that Kris was in the house. He meant what he’d said to his mother – he really was starting to trust the other man, it was just a little weird was all. He hadn’t entertained for a while now. 

“Oh God you’re not reading this are you?” Kris asked, holding up a copy of Fifty Shades. 

Adam rolled his eyes and shoved the book back into the crate. Leila must have snuck that in there. 

“Absolutely not, my mother seems to think it’s essential reading though. I told her I don’t need to get any sex tips from a book like this”

Kris chuckled and set the plastic bag on the kitchen counter, taking out its contents. He’d brought meat and spaghetti and sauce in an unlabelled jar. There was even a bottle of red wine. 

“Hope you like spaghetti” he said, watching as Adam sniffed at the contents of the jar. He looked a little bit nervous – about what he wasn’t sure. 

“Mama’s special sauce. She said if I’m to be entertaining, then I’ll always need a bottle of this in the house. I moved out a little while ago, but she always makes sure there’s a jar of that in the cupboard”

Adam smiled and set the jar down, moving around to put the bottle of wine in the fridge. Almost automatically Kris reached out and slipped his arm around his waist in a casual embrace, pulling him closer for a soft peck. 

“You ok? You seem nervous about something” his voice was soft and measured. 

Adam nodded. “Yeah, I’m good – I just ah…haven’t done this in a while”

Kris reached out and cupped his face, pulling him in for a deeper kiss. Slowly Adam melted against him, winding his hands in the soft hair at the base of Kris’s neck. 

“We’re just hanging out babe, we don’t have to do anything…”

“I want to though, God Kris I want you so much” Adam whispered roughly. Kris felt so good in his arms, so right. Perfect. 

“I want you too, you have no idea. I don’t want to do anything you’re not ready for. I know…something’s got you worked up and I’m willing to wait, there’s no pressure. You’ll tell me when you’re ready”

Kris’s soft words made Adam’s eyes sting but he blinked the tears away rapidly, nuzzling into Kris’s neck. “How come you’re so good to me?”

Kris chuckled throatily and played with his hair, running the longer strands through his fingers. “Cause I think I’m falling for you”

“You do?”

Kris kissed his temple. “I do”

“I feel the same way, I’m totally falling for you Kris”

Kris hummed and they held each other close for a moment, just breathing in the scent of each other and listening to the soft patter of the rain on the window. Adam gently traced his hands over Kris’s back, sighing softly at the feel of Kris’s own hands on his body, Adam had always been a tactile person, had always craved physical closeness in a partner, and Kris was proving to him just how good a partner he could be, if given the chance. 

Adam wanted to give him that chance. 

“Ok, you’re going to have to show me how to use that fancy oven there. It looks like a space ship” Kris said after a while. 

Adam chuckled and straightened, reaching for the tray of mincemeat Kris had brought with him. 

“I have no idea, but lets start, my stomach is growling”

Kris nodded and started searching around in the cupboards for an appropriate sized saucepan. The kitchen was well stocked with shiny appliances and expensive looking cookware, the bench tops made of dark marble. It was a really nice kitchen, one he hoped to spend a lot of time in. 

“So is this your house?” he asked, handing Adam some onions to slice. 

Adam shook his head. “No, this is one of my manager’s places. He’s got some family down here I think, so it was perfect”

“Cool. You must be paying him well to afford digs like this”

“Ha, yeah”

They worked in companionable silence for a moment, moving around the space easily. Typically the cut onions made Adam’s eyes water and Kris made him laugh when he produced some ridiculous looking safety glasses. 

“I think you’re supposed to wear them before you start cutting” he laughed, leaning over to add the onions to the simmering sauce. 

“Go and wash your face, I got this” Kris chuckled, snapping a tea towel at Adam’ s retreating backside. 

When Adam returned Kris had poured him a glass of wine and the food was almost done, the kitchen filled with its delicious aroma. Adam set his phone into the dock and started some music, a classy funky singer he was friend’s with. She’d worked with him on his album and he really enjoyed her music. 

As Kris had promised, the spaghetti was amazing and they hunkered down in the living room and shared a quiet and peaceful meal filled with soft touches and secret glances. The conversation flowed easily the whole time, and Adam soon found himself totally relaxing, Kris’s warm presence easing his nerves. He still wasn’t sure if he was ready to spill the whole story to him, but he was getting there. Nights like these helped confirm the fact that Kris would make a great partner, someone who would treat him like an equal and love him for him, not for his fame. 

They ended up putting a movie on afterwards, and curling up together on the lounge, sharing a pint of ice cream. Adam wasn’t overly focussed on the film, he was more interested in the feel of Kris behind him, the easy way his hand rested on Adam’s hip, the brush of his arm as he reached over him to dip the spoon into the ice cream. 

Kris didn’t push him though, and for the moment he was content just to sit and relax, sharing the odd comment or gentle touch as they lay together long into the night, eventually drifting off to sleep in each other’s arms.


	12. 12

Dawn broke early the next day, her rays of golden light spearing the sky and shining through the curtains onto the faces of the two sleeping men. Heavy rain clouds still hung low in the sky but for the moment, the sky was shot with gold, the dewdrops glimmering on the leaves and grass, rainbows cast in their mirrored depths. 

Kris was the first to wake, but he kept his eyes closed, pressing his face into the broad expanse of Adam’s back, inhaling deeply. He hadn’t meant to stay the night, but it seemed sleep had stolen that choice from him. Oh well. 

Gently he slipped his arms around Adam’s middle, hugging him closer. Adam snuffled softly and pressed back into him, making a soft sound in his throat. For such a tall man he could squish himself into the smallest spaces and still appear totally comfortable. He really was an amazing guy.

Kris smiled softly and pressed a kiss to Adam’s tee, thinking. Adam clearly had some issues he hadn’t discussed yet, but Kris wasn’t at all worried about entering a relationship with him. He felt they were more than that, and the fledgling love he felt growing in his heart urged him on. Adam was sweet and generous, and had such a big heart. He was the total package. 

Just then Adam turned over to face him, eyes half open, his face beautifully vulnerable. 

“We fell asleep” he mumbled drowsily. 

Kris smiled and kissed his nose. “Yep”

“You stayed all night?”

“I did. Hope you don’t mind”

Adam closed his eyes again. “Do you see me complaining?”

Kris chuckled. “Want some breakfast?”

Adam hummed. “You don’t have to do that, you’re a guest”

Kris gently extricated himself and straightened his rumpled clothes, clambering over the back of the lounge as he went into the kitchen. 

“I don’t mind, go back to sleep, the smell of my amazing cooking will wake you up” 

He grinned when he heard Adam’s answering laugh.

***

An hour later they were eating chocolate-chip pancakes at the dining table, sharing a pot of green tea. Personally Kris didn’t know how Adam drank the stuff – to him it tasted like grass, and he said so more than once.

“It’s good for you” came Adam’s reply. 

Kris rolled his eyes and took another mouthful. “So we can still go zip lining today if you want. I know the guy who runs it, and I’m pretty sure we can book a few runs”

“What exactly is zip lining? It sounds dangerous” Adam said dubiously. 

Kris swallowed. “Well you’re hooked into a harness and you’re on a line through the canopy, just zooming along. It’s great fun”

“How high up are you?”

“High enough. It’s totally safe”

Adam sipped his tea slowly. “As long as you’re sure”

Kris nodded. “Totally. Why don’t you go have a shower and I’ll make a few calls?”

Adam finished up his breakfast and pecked Kris on the cheek. “Ok”

***

As it turns out it wasn’t any trouble at all for Kris’s friend Vince to slot them into the zip-line centre, and after a short drive out to Ponca, they pulled into the parking lot. Vince came out the front to meet them, a little star struck that Kris had managed to secure such a high profile client for his small business. Never before had small town Ponca seen the likes of the inherently glamorous Adam Lambert, but Adam soon put him at ease with his good-natured humour and down to earth manner.

“So who’s going first?” Vince asked, helping them each secure themselves into a nylon harness. Because they’d arrived so early, he’d assured them that they’d be the only ones out here, which was a nice surprise. 

“I’ll go” Kris ventured, after Adam shot him a dubious look. 

“Good man” Vince said, clapping him on the back. After he’d checked both their harnesses, they all trooped to the upper level, where Adam examined the safety information while Vince secured Kris onto the cable. 

“It’s fine Adam, just relax and enjoy the view” Kris called as he jumped off the side of the platform, hollering loudly as he shot off through the trees. 

Adam felt slightly worried as Vince hooked his harness onto the cable. “You sure this is safe?”

Vince patted him on the back. “It’s totally fine. My colleague Sam is going to be there at the other end to catch you as you come up. Just relax and enjoy the view, it should be beautiful this morning”

With those words, he pushed Adam off the side of the platform and stepped back, wondering what Kris’s connection was to the celebrity. 

Adam sucked in a breath as he shot off through the canopy, the morning air fresh on his face, his hands gripping the cable line tightly. Ignoring the cardinal rule of never looking down, he did just that, and let out a surprised shout at how high up he was. His feet dangled below him and he forced himself to keep his eyes up. After a while he did find himself enjoying the view, and his fingers loosened their death grip on the cable. 

It was magnificent up here, he could see for miles amidst the trees, and it was peaceful and calm, the whirring of the line the only sound. Startled by his sudden movement birds flew out of the trees and Adam laughed aloud as he flew alongside them, one particular bird almost close enough to touch. It was remarkably liberating up here, the cold crisp air whipping his cheeks, tentatively he let go of the cable and stretched his arms out, his grin wide as he flew. 

He glided over water then and he marvelled at swans as they looked up at him, craning their elegant heads as they followed his movements. The sun shone brightly down on him as he zipped through the trees again, the end platform in sight, a dark haired man standing with Kris, ready to catch him. 

Kris jumped in the air when he caught sight of him, pumping his fist as Adam’s pace slowed and Sam was able to grab hold of his ankle to bring him in. Adam was breathless when he landed and was filled with excited energy, bouncing around on his feet as Sam unhooked him, grinning from ear to ear as he was finally freed. 

“Oh my God that was incredible!” he cried, flinging his arms around Kris and lifting him off his feet. 

“I told you it was!” Kris laughed, pecking Adam’s cheek. 

“Oh man it really felt like I was flying, all those birds just came up and I could almost touch them! Did you see those swans Kris? Oh wow, can we go again?”

“I don’t know can we Sam? When does the next group start?” Kris asked. 

Unfortunately Sam shook his head. “Sorry guys, we’ve got a group of nine coming in the next half hour. There’s not enough time to get you off again and have the harness ready. Sorry”

“That’s fine” Adam brushed it off and fumbled with the clips of his harness, his fingers clumsy in his excitement. 

“Hey would you mind if we snapped a photo of you two? Just for the business?” Sam asked once he hung up Adam’s helmet. 

In all his excitement Adam wasn’t thinking about his stalker, or any exposure of any kind. He nodded, thinking only of doing something nice for a complete stranger. 

“Sure” he said, slipping his arm around Kris’s waist and smiling for the camera. It didn’t even cross his mind that the photo might be put online, where anyone could see it, and because Kris didn’t know what was going on, he didn’t think to stop him. 

“Thanks guys. Glad you had fun Adam, Kris I’ll see you round town” Sam said, shaking both their hands once they’d finished de-harnessing. 

“Thanks so much Sam, and give our thanks to Vince too” Adam said, his cheeks still flushed from the chilly air. He took Kris’s hand as they walked back to the car and quickly pushed him up against it, claiming his mouth in a lustful kiss. 

“I want you” he breathed, sliding his hands under Kris’s tee, playing lightly with his waist band. Kris hummed and kissed him back, his cock hard in his jeans as Adam sucked on his bottom lip. The rush from the zip line mixed with his lust and he didn’t know how they made it back home without ravaging one another, because as soon as Adam’s front door closed behind them, they fell upon one another. 

Adam pushed Kris back onto the lounge almost roughly, straddling his waist, his fingers working on the buttons of Kris’s shirt. Kris was almost as eager, just about ripping his shirt off and wrapping his legs around Adam’s hips as he ground against him, groaning loudly when their jean-clad erections met. 

“Oh God get this off” Adam mumbled, fumbling with his belt buckle while he attempted to kick off his shoes, almost falling on his ass in the process. 

Slowly, tempering his movements Kris reached out and brought him closer, quickly sliding off the tight denim and slowing Adam’s almost frenzied hands. He wanted to savour this moment: he didn’t want to rush it. 

“Easy now, come here” he whispered, shucking his own jeans till they were clad in nothing other than their skin. Adam’s cock was rock hard against his belly, and he moaned when Kris took him in hand, stroking him lightly. Gently Kris moved so they were lying side by side on the wide lounge, Adam’s long fingers playing idly with his hair while he kissed him languidly, Kris still stroking him. 

After a few more strokes Adam shivered and pulled him closer, cupping the globes of his ass. His lips were warm on his neck and he reached down to still Kris’s hands. 

“Want you” he breathed. 

“Do you have…stuff?” Kris asked, his toes curling in carnal pleasure when Adam nodded and produced a small bottle of lube and a condom from God knows where. 

“Turn around” Adam said, his lips pressed to Kris’s back again as he squirted a generous amount of lube onto his hand. Kris groaned wantonly when he felt Adam’s slick fingers slip inside him, gently stretching him out for what was to come. Biting his shoulder, Adam reached around and took hold of him, stroking him a few times as he lined up his erection, pushing slowly inside him. 

“Uhhh” Kris breathed, closing his eyes as he felt his ass stretch and burn a little. Adam was so big. 

“Breathe baby” Adam whispered, his voice catching when he was finally sheathed inside him. Kris reached around to rest his hands on Adam’s hips as he rocked forward, his eyes popping open as Adam continued to stroke his cock. 

“Uh…” he moaned again when he felt Adam brush his prostate, his rhythm picking up as he pushed his ass against the other man. God it felt amazing to be so close, to feel Adam within him, in more ways than one. 

Adam panted as he thrust faster, Kris’s tight little hole hugging his dick. He could feel his orgasm building inside him, and was a little disappointed he hadn’t lasted very long, but then it had been a while, and Kris was fucking moaning like that, all high-pitched and keening, and finally he couldn’t hold on anymore, coming into the condom with a shuddering breath, holding Kris close as the other man trembled with his own release. 

It was a moment before Kris could even talk, and when he did his voice was scratchy. Adam felt a moment of purely male satisfaction at the thought that he’d made him sound like that. 

“Well clearly I should take you zip lining more often!”

Adam laughed and rolled Kris over to face him, kissing him softly. “That was totally amazing”

“What the sex or the zip lining?” Kris joked. 

Adam rolled his eyes. “For both. Thanks Kris, I mean it”

Kris kissed him, sucking on his full bottom lip for a moment. “You’re welcome”

***

Meanwhile back at the Ponca zip line centre Sam checked off the day’s activities while he uploaded tourist photo’s to the centre web page. It had been nice to see Kris again, they’d gone to High school together and had kept in contact when he’d moved away. He still couldn’t believe Adam Lambert had been at the centre today, and with Kris of all people! Were they together? He hadn’t missed the little peck on the cheek Kris had given him, and he wondered where they’d met.

Bringing up the web page, he flicked through the pictures looking for the photo of Adam and Kris. He wanted to put it online – nothing would be better for business than if he had a photo of a well- known celebrity endorsing his business. It’d be great. 

Finally finding the photo, he uploaded it to the main page and put a large border around it, typing a caption underneath for the visitors. 

__

Couldn’t believe it when mega star Adam Lambert dropped into the centre today on his holiday. Thanks for dropping by Adam, great to meet you. 

_There that should do it_ , he mused, exiting the web page and turning to other paper work.

Little did he realise what he’d done.


	13. 13

Jeremy Styles was growing increasingly annoyed. It had been just over a month and he hadn’t heard any news regarding Adam Lambert, and he was getting desperate. Adam had to know how much he meant to him, how much he wanted him. His life depended on it. 

Sighing angrily, Jeremy dragged a hand through his dirty-blonde hair, once again planted in front of his computer searching online for any Adam news. He’d set up his Google account so he was alerted whenever Adam’s name popped up. 

Today he was pleasantly surprised when he saw several emails in his inbox, each mentioning Adam. The first email wasn’t anything special, just a poll announcing an online competition between Adam and another singer, (who in Jeremy’s opinion didn’t hold a candle to him). The second was a rumoured sighting which piqued his interest only momentarily, because once he saw the photo he realised it wasn’t Adam, (the facial shape was totally wrong, Adam’s cheekbones were higher than that). 

The third email however really grabbed him because this one was real. Apparently Adam had been spotted at a zip lining and tourist centre at a place called Ponca in Arkansas. Arkansas? Why the hell was he all the way down there? What had possessed him to move there? Jeremy minimised his email inbox and opened another window, typing the name of the centre into Google. 

Bingo. There it was, right on the homepage, a clear photo of Adam Lambert all kitted out in a harness and helmet. He was standing with another man in front of the zip line sign looking just perfect. Jeremy smiled and traced a finger over his computer screen, feeling his dick harden in his pants. Adam looked great, if a little thin (but then Jeremy had always thought Adam looked better with a little weight on). His cheeks were adorably flushed and he looked, well he looked happy. 

Licking his lips Jeremy reached for a pen and quickly scribbled down the address of the centre, noting the nearby cities and suburbs. Maybe Adam was staying somewhere in Arkansas for a holiday? Jeremy felt a wave of vindictive anger at the other man in the photo, a short chestnut haired man who had his arm around Adam’s waist. No, HE should be the one to be holding Adam so closely. It should be him and no one else. No one else deserved that honour. 

Once he got the address down he opened another window and set about booking a flight that would get him into Arkansas the next day. He didn’t bother booking accommodation – he’d pay for that with cash once he got there. His only problem now was how to pass the rest of the day while he waited for his flight. He added a few more photo’s of Adam to the folder on his computer before he shut it off, sprawling onto his bed. 

Sighing in satisfaction he slipped out of his trousers and took hold of himself, stroking his length while he fantasised about Adam being on his knees in front of him. Someday that would happen, he’d have that glorious creature bound and gagged the way he should be: his lips stretched thin around his length, his ass red and gaping, filled with his seed. 

It was a glorious image, and one that would keep him satisfied until the day it happened. Yes, there were plenty of ways to pass his time while he waited.

***

“Kris we’ve been sitting here for an hour now, it’s not going to happen”

“Just give it a bit longer, it’s going to happen”

Adam sighed and dropped his fishing line to the bottom of the boat, staring morosely at the calm waters of Lake Conway. They’d been sitting in this damn boat for almost three hours, and so far Kris’s grand idea to take him fishing: had failed. He hadn’t caught a single fish, or even felt a bite. 

“Can we go home now?” he asked, idly flicking the side of Kris’s shirt that was flapping in the gentle breeze. Kris batted his hand away. 

“Stop that, and no we can’t. Fishing is about patience Adam, you have to wait and just be quiet and sit. The fish are there, you’re just making too much noise”

Adam leaned forward. “You weren’t complaining about that this morning”

Kris’s cheeks coloured. “Hush, you’re so bad”

“Yeah and you love it” Adam joked, picking up his rod again and settling back. Sighing audibly he stared out at the water again, watching the shimmering ripples through his expensive designer sunglasses. Kris had been worried he’d loose them on the water, but Adam had assured him they’d stay firmly glued to his eyes. As a naturally fair-haired man, Adam was prone to sunburn, and didn’t want to add any more freckles to his already impressive collection. 

(Kris hadn’t told him that he thought the freckles were adorable, and his favourite pastime was kissing each and every one of them, and Adam had them everywhere…yes, everywhere). 

Adam sighed again and continued to stare out over the water, watching other families at play, children laughing madly as they were towed by a floaty doughnut. No wonder the fish weren’t biting, it was way too loud out here. This was boring. 

“Are you busy on Saturday night?” Kris asked after a while. He was still stubbornly focussed on catching a fish, his eyes trained on a distant point somewhere on the horizon. 

“Nope” Adam said, popping the p. 

Kris chewed his lip, suddenly nervous. He wasn’t sure exactly how to voice this, so after a second’s debate with himself, he decided to just spit it out. 

“My parents want to meet you”

“I beg your pardon?”

Kris blew out a breath. “My parents want to meet you.”

Adam swallowed, feeling a twist of anxiety. Had he been photographed around town? Had Kris’s parents recognised him from a picture?

“Why?” he asked eventually. 

Kris set his pole on the bottom of the boat and turned to face him, sighing softly. 

“They want to meet the guy who’s taken up so much of my time. I haven’t had a boyfriend in a long time, and they’re curious. That’s all”

Adam nodded, both relieved and irritated with himself. Get over yourself Lambert. Not everyone wants to screw you over or photograph you, or even be near you. Relax.

“Ok” he said, nervously scratching the back of his head. He hadn’t met a partner’s parents for a long time, in fact the last set of parents he’d met belonged to Drake, and their whole history was well…history. 

Kris smiled. “It’s just for dinner on Saturday night. Just a casual night in: them and us. My brother’s not going to be there, he’s too busy with his little baby and wife. It’d really mean a lot to them if you came along”

“Ok, sure, it sounds nice” Adam said, pleased that he could put such a pleasant expression on Kris’s face. It was amazing that such a small agreement could make the other man so happy. 

Kris leant forward to kiss him, squeezing his hands at the same time. Adam melted into the kiss, resting his forehead against Kris’s once they’d broken apart. His anxiety and nervousness must have been visible on his face, because Kris rubbed his legs soothingly. 

“It’s gonna be fine. I’ll be right with you the whole time”

Adam nodded, glad for the support. It felt stupid to need him this badly, especially since they’d only been dating a couple of months, but he did. Kris was strength for him, a solid, stoic presence that did immeasurable things in quashing his nerves. He’d be ok with this dinner, after all it was only Kris’s parents, and if they’d raised someone as cool as he was, then they must be ok right?

“I trust you” he whispered, the words seeming to have some hidden meaning. It meant more than simply trusting him with the dinner, it meant trusting him with his life, with his heart. 

Kris kissed him again, his fishing pole lying forgotten on the bottom of the boat, for he’d caught a bigger prize than some measly trout. He’d caught the heart of the sweetest, most genuine man on the planet, and he wasn’t about to let him go.


	14. 14

“You look great Adam” Kris called for what seemed like the thousandth time that night. For most of the afternoon Adam had barricaded himself in his bedroom planning his outfit. His parents expected them at the house at 6:30pm and he could tell Adam was worried. 

“Yeah” Adam mumbled distractedly as he put the finishing touches on his makeup. Gently he ran his eyeliner along his top lid, blending just a little for the desired effect. He was going for understated glam tonight, not too much, but just enough to make him feel like himself. Makeup had always been a kind of armour for him, and it was always something he relied upon in times of stress. 

“Babe, you look really good. Hot” Kris said as he came to stand in the doorway. He was dressed casually in jeans and a faded blue shirt that brought out the highlights in his hair and made his tanned skin glow. Adam thought he looked effortlessly yummy. 

“I don’t know why I’m so nervous about this” Adam admitted, setting down the eye pencil. In reality he did know why he was so nervous, but he was trying diligently to ignore it. 

Kris squeezed into the space between Adam and the counter, sliding his arms around Adam’s neck. He thought Adam looked totally gorgeous, his black tee and tight jeans showcasing his long legs and lean body. Add to that his impressively coiffed hair and sparkling blue eyes and Kris was sure he’d make a great impression.

“You don’t have to worry, it’s just dinner” he said, squeezing Adam’s shoulders. 

Adam sighed and Kris hated that he was so torn up about something so small. What was going on in that head of his? What secrets were tormenting him?

“I know, I’m being silly”

Kris chuckled and pressed a kiss to Adam’s lips, reassuring him. “It’s going to be fine. It’s just my parents”

***

Across town Jeremy Styles checked into the Motel 6 on the main road of Conway Arkansas, dragging his feet after a long day of fruitless searching. He’d spent the day walking all over the neighbouring towns looking for Adam Lambert, but to no avail. As soon as he’d gotten off the plane he’d gone straight to the zip-lining tourist centre in Ponca, but that had proved useless, because the manager couldn’t really tell him anything, other than the fact that yes, Adam had been there. He didn’t know where Adam was staying, so he decided to take a gamble and set up in Conway for a couple of days. That way he could set up a base and do some more research.

Once he showered and changed he opened up a web browser and started searching for any Adam related news. He felt he’d been lucky with the tourist centre photo, and he hoped something like that would pop up again. He knew Adam was a social person, so naturally it would only be a matter of time before he made an appearance somewhere. 

Sighing softly he peered at the screen for a moment longer, disappointed at the lack of news. Some of the fan boards were going crazy about the sighting, with some people speculating (as he was also), that Adam was somewhere near there. Maybe he was even staying in Conway? He could be somewhere close? 

With renewed vigour he shut the computer and grabbed his jacket, stuffing his hotel key into the pocket once he locked the door. Maybe he should just do a quick walk around before bed: that would probably be best. Who knows, maybe he’d even see his love around town – if he was even here. 

He kept to himself as he walked the footpaths, his eyes scaling every available home for any sign of Adam. He could see people at dinner, or sitting in their family rooms, but so far no Adam. 

He’d just rounded a corner onto a quiet tree-lined street when a beat up truck trundled past him, pulling into a single story home two houses down from where he was standing. Casually he glanced up as the two people inside stepped onto the garden path, and then his stomach dropped to his feet. 

It was Adam, his glorious, beautiful, amazing Adam, and he was just standing there right in front of him. It was a surreal feeling, and he quickly ducked into some shrubbery to keep from being seen. It was such a quiet, cool night that Adam’s voice reached him, and he felt his dick twitch at the dulcet tone of his voice. 

“Kris, I’m so overdressed, I feel stupid”

Jeremy watched as the other man – this Kris – rested his hands on Adam’s hips in a casually intimate gesture. His blood boiled. He should be the one holding Adam like that. 

“For the hundredth time, you look great” Kris said quietly, and Jeremy seethed with rage when the two men kissed. 

“Honestly” Adam sighed, then slipped his arm around Kris’s waist to hold him close. Jeremy couldn’t hear what they whispered to each other, but when Kris pulled away his eyes shone wetly. 

Jeremy kept his eyes trained on the pair as they walked up to the front door, disappearing inside it to the sound of cheerful introductions. 

Maybe he’d stay for a while.

***

“Mom? Dad? I’d like you to meet Adam Lambert” Kris made the necessary introductions once they’d stepped inside, met with the politely curious stares of his parents. Beside him he could almost feel Adam vibrating with nerves and it floored him that such a seemingly confident man could be so unsure of himself.

“Hi, it’s lovely to meet you” Adam said graciously, a dazzling smile on his face. 

“You too, I’m Kimberly, this is my husband Neal. It’s so nice to meet you Adam, please come in and sit down” Kim said, and Kris grinned at the slight blush on her cheeks. She was so taken, and Adam had barely said a word. 

His father shook Adam’s hand briskly and gave him a severe-looking smile that was all bluff, before they all took a seat in the living room. Soft jazz music floated up from speakers set into the wall and the whole house was filled with the delicious aroma of his mothers good cooking. 

“What’s for tea Ma?” Kris asked as he took a seat next to Adam on the lounge. 

“We’re having a roast dinner. I hope you’re not a vegetarian Adam?” Kim said, accepting a glass of wine from Neal, who then turned to Adam. 

“What can I get you? Red? White? Whiskey? Soda?”

“Red would be lovely thank you. And no I’m not a vegetarian Mrs Allen” Adam said. 

Kim blushed and Kris could tell she was a little star struck. “Oh call me Kim dear”

Adam smiled and Kris could see some of his tension leaking away. His smiles came more easily now. 

“So we don’t know much about you Adam, other than that you’re close to Kris here. Tell us a bit about you” Neal said once he’d seen to it that every one had drinks. 

“Well I’m a singer, have been all my life. I grew up in San Diego before I came out to LA to try to make it professionally. Um, I was the runner up on season 8 of American Idol before I made my first record. My second came out last year. It’s been a pretty unbelievable ride so far”

Kim’s eyes widened slightly at just how successful Adam was. She had no idea Kris was dating someone, let alone a celebrity, and she wondered how they’d met. 

“Well, I had no idea. I’m afraid my musical taste is limited to my old Simon and Garfunkel records, or my Beatles collection. I don’t keep up with modern music much, but I’m sure you’re very successful” Neal said honestly. 

“Thank you, you and my Dad have very similar tastes. I grew up on that music, along with Queen and Led Zeppelin, so I know their appeal”

Kris smiled as the conversation flowed, pleased that everyone was getting along so well. He’d known his parents would like Adam, how could they not? He sat back as they continued to talk music and their favourite artists, laughing and chatting like old friends. More than once he caught his mother’s eye from across the room and he had to stifle his grin. 

From there they moved easily into the dining room where they all gathered around Kim’s oak dining table for her roast dinner. For Adam it felt like he hadn’t eaten a meal this nourishing in a very long time, and he hoped he’d get the chance to introduce his mom to Kim – they’d get along very well he was sure. 

“So how’s Zach going?” Kris asked. 

“Oh he’s going so well now, he’s growing so much every day. Zach’s our first grandson Adam, we love him dearly” Kim supplied, noticing Adam’s polite curiosity. 

“Oh great, you didn’t tell me you’re an uncle” Adam lightly slapped Kris’s arm as he sipped his wine. Kris shrugged. 

“I would have, eventually”

Adam chuckled and was just about to set his glass back onto the table when he paled considerably – his gaze focussed on the dining room window. For a moment there he’d thought he’d seen a face peering back at him, a sallow pointed face with a mop of light-coloured hair. 

“What is it?” Kris asked, concerned. 

“Nothing I um…never mind” Adam muttered, returning his glass to the table and picking up his cutlery with trembling fingers. Kris peered out the window, wondering what had Adam so spooked. He couldn’t see anything apart from the darkened garden. 

He tried to strike up a conversation after that, but the mood was lost. After a few moments of stilted chatter Adam abruptly stood. 

“Excuse me for one second please, where’s the bathroom?”

“It’s just down the hall, first door on the left” Kim said, watching as the tall man made his way through the living room to the hall, disappearing into the bathroom. 

“Is he ok?” Neal asked. 

Kris shrugged and stood up to follow, concerned. “I’m not sure, let me just see. I’ll be right back”


	15. 15

Adam shut the bathroom door tightly behind him and sucked in a deep breath, trying to halt his racing heart. He hadn’t imagined seeing that face, there had been a man outside the window, his nose was pressed to the glass and his dark eyes were fixed with laser intensity on the scene unfolding at the dining table. 

What the fuck was happening? He didn’t know exactly, and he hated the feeling. He’d been enjoying the meal and friendly conversation when all of a sudden he’d noticed that face. How long had that guy been there? Had he been there the whole night? Had he watched them at the car? 

“Adam? Sweetheart are you ok?” Kris’s voice was soft and filled with concern, but the sudden noise still made Adam start a little. 

_Get a grip Adam_ he told himself sternly as he reached over to open the door. Kris stepped inside and shut the door again, giving them some privacy. Adam appreciated the gesture. 

“Are you ok?” Kris asked again. 

Adam raised his eyes to the ceiling and sighed softly, nodding. “Yeah, sorry for…that”

“It’s ok, what’s going on huh? You look like you’ve seen a ghost” Kris said, gently rubbing his arm. He wasn’t crowding him, but Adam was glad he was so close. 

Adam bit his lip, but knew he had to tell Kris what had happened. After all this was his parent’s house. 

“I saw someone at the window”

Kris’s eyes widened slightly. “You did? Someone watching us?”

Adam nodded and sat down on the closed toilet. “Yeah, it was only for a second or so, but I definitely saw someone out there. He was blonde and had dark eyes”

Kris nodded, but still looked like he didn’t really understand why Adam was so shaken up. Sure it was scary seeing someone peering in the window, but Adam looked almost…frightened. 

“There’s something else, something deeper I don’t know. Are you alright really?” Kris asked, kneeling in front of Adam, his hands resting on his knees. Adam glanced up and ran a hand through his hair, knowing it all had to come out eventually. 

“No” he admitted, his eyes welling a little. _God you’re such a fucking pussy. Who’d want to be with you? Wimp._

“Oh baby come here, it’s ok” Kris gently soothed him, wrapping his arms around Adam’s tense shoulders. Adam didn’t cry, but clung to him tightly unsure of what exactly to do. His chest felt all tight, but he fought off the anxiety and focussed on pulling steadying breaths in, then blowing them out, calming himself. 

“I’ll tell you, I will, just not right now. This isn’t really something I want to talk about in my boyfriends parents bathroom” Adam said after a moment, his voice muffled by Kris’s shoulder. Absently he hoped he wasn’t getting makeup on Kris’s shirt. 

Kris pulled back and kissed him softly, his gaze soft. “Is that what I am? Your boyfriend”

Adam’s cheeks heated. “Yeah, if that’s ok with you”

Kris kissed him again and squeezed his hand tightly. “It’s more than ok. Are you ready to go back out there now?”

Adam nodded. “Yeah, in a sec. I actually do have to pee”

Kris chuckled. “Ok, well would it make you feel better if I checked around the garden? It might have been kids playing tricks or something”

A thrill of fear slipped down Adam’s spine at the thought of Kris exposing himself to the psycho that was stalking him. Even though he hadn’t seen the guy before today, he felt sure that’s who it had been, and he wondered how he’d been found. 

“I don’t know” he hedged. 

Kris chewed his lip for a second. “I’ll turn on the front lights then, just so we can see. They light up the whole yard”

“Ok” That sounded better to Adam, and he gave Kris an embarrassed little wave as he stood up, chuckling at the face he pulled. 

_Satisfied now? You had to have Kris come in here and comfort you like a fucking baby. Get over yourself Adam._

Pushing away the snide little voice in his head, he flipped up the toilet lid and closed his eyes.

***

“Everything good?” Kim asked once Kris had come back from the bathroom. She’d noticed her son flick the front yard light on and stare at the yard for a moment, as if searching for something before he’d come back to the table.

“Yeah. All good” he said, sitting down and sipping the last of his drink. His parents waited expectantly for an answer, but it wasn’t his place to say what was going on for Adam – heck he didn’t even know himself. 

“It’s fine”

“Alright then” Neal said, sounding unsure. 

Just then Adam stepped back into the room, his face composed, the fear gone from his eyes. There was some colour back in his cheeks now and Kris reached for his hand under the table, giving it a quick squeeze. 

“Sorry about that. Where were we?”

***

An hour later after a thoroughly delicious meal they bade goodnight to Kim and Neal and headed home. After seeing the face at the window Adam had put on a brave face and hidden his emotions from Kris’s parents spectacularly, but now they were alone, the mask came down and he looked tired and pale and not at all well. Kris wondered what sort of toll his secret was having on his health.

He followed Adam inside once they got to the house, and didn’t miss the way he checked the lock on the door twice. Something was definitely still bothering him, but he didn’t push. Adam had said he’d tell him, and he believed him. For now he’d be here for support. He kicked off his shoes at the front door and went straight to the kitchen, searching for something that would give Adam some strength. 

“Want some decaf? Tea? Maybe some of that brandy in the decanter there” he called as he loitered in the kitchen. It was tidy, but still a little messy. Adam’s breakfast bowl was still on the counter as was his mug. He’d do the dishes later. 

“Tea would be soo good” Adam said as he came back down the hall, now clad in soft sleep pants and a forest green tee. He’d taken his makeup off too, and Kris smiled as he caught sight of the freckles on Adam’s bottom lip. He loved them, just as he loved the man who bore them. 

“What are you grinning at?” 

Kris ducked his head. “Nothin. You want green tea? Or this caravan stuff, or this Chai shit”

Adam rolled his eyes and pushed him out of the way so he could make his own tea. Kris just didn’t appreciate the value of a steaming mug and the warm aromatic flavour. Tonight he was in need of some Harmony Tea.

“You want normal then?” he asked Kris, who was leaning against the counter watching him. 

“No I’m good”

Adam nodded and sipped the scalding brew appreciatively, feeling the herbs work on his nerves. The weight of his secret hung between them and he knew he had to start talking. 

Problem was he didn’t really know where to start. 

But Kris, being the perceptive man he is, immediately picked up on Adam’s distress and slipped his arms around him, reaching around to place the mug on the counter. 

“It’s gonna be ok, whatever it is, it’s going to be fine. I’m not going to leave you. Adam, I’m not going to leave you”

At that Adam’s eyes watered again but this time he let the tears flow, feeling lost and overwhelmed and completely strung out, his mind running in circles. He was so tired of this shit. 

“It’s ok, baby it’s ok” Kris said, holding the other man close. He kept up the soothing mantra as he moved them over to the lounge, cradling Adam to him once they were seated. Truthfully he was more than a little concerned. Adam seemed to have totally crumbled. 

“I’m sorry…” Adam mumbled, his voice shaky. Kris shushed him and kissed the top of his head. 

“You’re ok, whatever’s going on…let me help you. Give some of that pain to me” 

Adam sighed and sat up, brushing at his eyes. At that moment he looked totally worn out, and not at all like the man he’d first met. In fact he looked worse. 

“Please baby, you can trust me”

“I know, I do Kris, I trust you, it’s just…fucked up”

Kris squeezed Adam’s hand. “Maybe this would be easier if you didn’t look at me, come here”

Slowly they moved so they were spooning on the lounge, Kris at Adam’s back, his hands holding him firmly. He pressed a little kiss to the exposed skin of Adam’s neck, urging him on. 

“It didn’t start that long ago really…”


	16. 16

“It didn’t start that long ago really, I don’t even really know how this got so out of hand, but it has and here we are so…awesome”

Adam cleared his throat and squeezed Kris’s hand, taking comfort from his presence. 

“It started when I got a letter. Normally Mom helps me with the fan mail I get, we usually make a day of it when I have time, but on this particular day I was by myself. I’d opened up pretty much all the letters in the box and I wasn’t thinking much about the last one. It wasn’t anything unusual, just a fan letter, but it was the way it was written that made me look twice”

Adam stared off across the room as he remembered finding that letter. That had been the start of it all. 

“It was written in big block letters and was all creepy and shit. I didn’t think much of it at first, I mean not to blow my own horn, but I get thousands of letters every week, so it didn’t strike me as anything weird. That was until I got another one a couple of days later. It was exactly the same but there was a lock of hair inside the envelope. Blonde hair”

“That one gave me the creeps so I told my manager David and he called the cops. They told me to keep an eye on things and to let them know if I got any more letters like it. Unfortunately I did, but the next one came with photos”

“Photo’s?” Kris echoed. 

Adam nodded. “Yeah, photos of me. There was one of the house and the grounds, and one of me standing beside my car. It was so creepy, they were all black and white and super grainy. Like serial killer photos. I didn’t know what to do, other than go to the cops”

Adam swallowed. “It only got worse after that. I got more photos, nasty little gifts, wherever I went they found me. I kept getting them even when I was on tour! I couldn’t work out what was happening, it just, it got to be too much, especially after what happened in New York recently”

“What happened in New York?” Kris asked gently. 

Adam took a breath. “Whoever is stalking me broke into my dressing room and jerked off under my makeup table. I came back after a show to find his…leavings under the table with another note”

“Oh God, I’m so sorry. That must have been awful”

Adam nodded and snuggled back into Kris’s arms. “It was. I lost it after that, I couldn’t function, I collapsed and had to be taken to hospital. That’s when David decided to send me out here to recover”

Kris held him tightly, his heart hurting. It must have been so frightening to be in the position Adam was in – hiding away from the world. Already he knew Adam would be an extremely sociable person, but that chance had been ripped away from him by the sicko that was stalking him. 

Was that who he’d seen at his parent’s house? Had he seen his stalker? Slowly Kris was piecing together all the details of the past few months. Adam’s anxiety, his insecurities: his roller-coaster emotional state. It all made sense now. What a horrible turn of events. 

“Have you heard anything from the police about all this?” Kris asked after a few moments of silence. 

Adam sighed and rolled to face him. “No, I have no idea if anything’s been found or done. I’m assuming David’s got it all under control”

“Have you heard from him since you’ve been here?”

Adam shook his head and Kris wondered how someone could do that. Adam had said this David guy was supposed to have his best interests at heart, but why hadn’t he called to check on his client? It seemed weird. He understood that Adam was still too overwrought to deal with a lot of the details, but he still thought he should have been informed. 

“He’s a good guy, I mean it must be pretty intense for him. He’s had to cancel a lot of appearances I was slotted in for, and a whole lot of other stuff. The Grammy’s are coming up too, so he’s probably working hard on stuff to do with that”

“Yeah” Kris said absently, still thinking. It still seemed weird for Adam to be here alone, without protection from whoever was stalking him. He didn’t know what he could do about it though. 

“Do you know what they look like?” he asked, referring to the Stalker. 

“No, I mean the hair in the envelope was blonde, but I have no idea if that was real hair or fake. It could have been dolls hair, just to fuck with me”

Kris shook his head and held Adam close, running his hands up and down his back soothingly. He could leave this analysis for later – Adam needed something else right now. 

“Come on, let’s go to bed huh?” he said, pulling Adam up. Now that the story had been told Adam was exhausted, the stress and adrenaline catching up with him. Leaving his half drunk mug of tea behind, he followed Kris to the master bedroom and snuggled under the covers, watching Kris change for bed through half-closed eyes. 

He couldn’t believe it really, Kris was still here. He hadn’t run screaming like he’d expected him too. While Adam had always had a close group of friends, he didn’t often rely on them for emotional support, but now with Kris he felt like he could do just that. It was nice. 

“I can’t believe you’re still here” he mumbled sleepily as Kris joined him. 

“Of course I’m still here. I…I love you Adam”

At that Adam’s eyes widened and he sat up. “You do?”

Kris nodded and pulled Adam back down, pressing a kiss to his lips. “I do. I love you”

Adam smiled and hugged the smaller man, breathing in the scent of his skin. Immediately he felt his nerves dissipate, sent flying away by Kris’s cool, calm assertion. He was loved. 

“I love you too” he whispered, knowing in his heart that it was true. He’d never been more certain of something in his life.

***

Meanwhile back in Motel 6 Jeremy Styles stroked himself to completion, moaning out his orgasm as he shot his load onto the sheets, visions of his ebony-haired beauty filling his mind. He couldn’t believe he’d found him, after all this time. He felt like he was the King of the World right now, soon he’d have Adam to himself, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop him.

He wasn’t overly worried at the fact that Adam had caught sight of him peering in the window last night. It had only been for a second anyway, and no-one had come rushing out to investigate, so he was fairly confident he hadn’t been recognised. Despite his excitement though, he was angry with himself for being so lax with his personal security. He shouldn’t have allowed his emotions to get the better of him. 

Something had to be done about Adam, and he had to do it now while the iron was hot. The letters weren’t enough anymore: he needed to have Adam with him, needed to feel the other man’s warmth. He needed to love him. It was as simple as that. Unfortunately though he wasn’t sure where Adam was staying, he hadn’t been able to follow him after being discovered at the house. 

Maybe he was staying at the other man’s house? The more he thought about it, the more he realised it was probably true. Adam was probably shacked up with this Kris person, filling his days with mindless chatter and meaningless sex. Well that was about to change. As soon as Jeremy was able to find him, Adam’s days of frivolity would be no more. He just needed to stay in town for a bit longer, just to work out where the singer was living. Then he’d make his move. 

Adam’s days of freedom were numbered.


	17. 17

Adam woke late the next morning, and he stared out the window at the overcast sky and threatening clouds. It seemed the weather had picked up on his mood and he snuffled softly and curled back down under the blanket. Winter was definitely in the air. 

Beside him Kris slept on, snoring softly with his mouth open. The blanket had fallen down during the night, exposing his tanned chest and sleek abdominal muscles. Adam had always wanted a body like that, and he supposed now he had one, (well one to play with anyway). Carefully so as not to disturb him, he rested his head on Kris’s shoulder, curling up in his arms. 

“Hmmm” Kris breathed, unconsciously holding Adam close. 

“Go back to sleep love” Adam whispered, gently tracing Kris’s eyebrows. 

Kris opened his eyes, a lazy smile on his lips. “I’ve got a better idea. I want to make you feel good, I want to make you forget everything that happened last night. Will you let me?”

Puzzled Adam nodded. “Yeah, but you already make me feel…”

His words trailed off as Kris kissed him lazily, his tongue drawing circles on the roof of Adam’s mouth, heedless of any morning breath they might have. Adam moaned throatily as hot waves of desire rolled through him, slow burning and intense. His toes curled in carnal anticipation as he felt Kris slip a hand into his sleep pants, fondling his cock before beginning a torturously sensuous rhythm, stroking him slowly, his thumb flicking over the head of Adam’s stiff dick. 

“Uhhh” Adam moaned, his hips thrusting against Kris’s hand, the sound half swallowed by their joined mouths. Quickly Kris divested him of his clothes and they lay naked together, bodies moving in a slow rhythm. God they hadn’t done much more than kiss and Adam was already panting, his breath coming in stuttered gasps as Kris kissed a fiery trail down his body to lick along his hip, just soft little touches that were maddeningly intense. He’d never been touched like this before. 

Kris hummed as he finally took Adam in his mouth, using the flat of his tongue to stroke a broad stripe along his cock, tasting the salty pre-come at the tip. Adam’s back arched and he let out a breathy moan, his hands fisted in the bedclothes. Kris grinned, pleased he could have such an effect on the other man. Ever so slowly he released Adam’s cock with an audible pop and licked down to his hole, drawing Adam’s cheeks apart so he could get right in there with his tongue. 

“Ohh, oh Kris” Adam moaned as he opened his legs, panted breaths falling from his lips, his hands reaching down to nestle in Kris’s hair as he received the best rimjob of his life. 

Kris took his time, employing every trick in his repertoire as he licked and tasted, French-kissing Adam’s ass like it was his mouth. Saliva dribbled down his chin but he didn’t care, all he cared about was driving Adam crazy with want. It seemed to be working too. 

“Uhhh” Adam groaned, his release building inside him as Kris continued to rim him. Vaguely he was aware that he looked ridiculously slutty right now, his legs raised and spread wide, another man’s head between his cheeks, but he didn’t give a shit. All he cared about was escaping the moment, surrendering to the magnificent feel of Kris’s skilled lips and tongue. 

“Oh God I’m gonna come…” he whimpered, wanting to hold onto this moment for as long as he could. 

Kris surfaced with a loud breath, his lips shiny and flushed and reached for a condom, sloppily kissing Adam while he slipped it on. Slicking a generous amount of lube onto his fingers, he reached down and slipped one easily inside Adam, watching the digit disappear into his body. Adam moaned again, his face and chest flushed, sweat clinging in beads to his upper lip. 

“Oh come on, put it in me, come on come on come on…uhh” he moaned wantonly as Kris slipped another finger inside him, spitting loudly onto his hole as he scissored his fingers. 

“You ready baby?” Kris asked rhetorically as he lined up, ready to push within his lover for the first time. 

Adam’s response was to groan loudly again, his mouth open as Kris slowly entered him, his toes curling again at the feel, the sweet hot invasion that he loved so much. None of his fans knew he loved bottoming quite this much, but he loved submitting, loved giving up some of his carefully constructed control. 

“Oh yeah…” Kris grunted when he was finally sheathed deep inside him, Adam’s legs spread wide before him, his body open and willing. It was a heady moment, filled with hedonistic pleasure, spikes of lust spearing his belly. Fuck Adam was hot like this. 

“Move” Adam whispered, one arm flung over his face, his breath still coming fast. Kris spread his legs even wider, resting his hands on Adam’s heels before he snapped his hips, rocking in and making Adam’s eyes pop open. 

“Oh God, oh yeah…that’s it…” Adam’s voice was quiet now, more intense, and Kris rocked in again, his own climax building inside him as he watched Adam writhe before him. Glancing down he almost lost it at the sight of his cock sliding easily in and out of Adam’s body, the lube making an obscene sound in the quiet room. 

“Want it harder…” Adam mumbled, his head snapping up, eyes open wide as Kris gave a particularly hard thrust, slamming into his prostate and making him see spots. 

“Like that?” Kris panted, snapping his hips again. He knew he’d hit the right spot when Adam’s back arched again and he reached down to furiously jack his cock. He was almost there…almost…just a few more thrusts…

“Oh Kris…oh…oh…oh!” Adam’s voice rose in pitch and he squeezed his eyes closed, his hand a blur on his dick as he rocketed toward climax, his mind filled with nothing but the need to come. It coiled low in his belly, washing upwards, his toes curling. 

“OH!” he yelled, thrashing his head from side to side as he came in a hot rush, come painting his stomach, his vision blurring. His whole body clenched and Kris was tipped over the edge too, holding himself flush to his body as he rode out his orgasm. Both were panting hard. 

“Oh my God” Adam panted once he’d come back to himself. Sweat made his hair slick on his forehead and his pupils were blown. He looked totally fucked out. 

Kris laughed and disposed of the condom, kissing Adam’s cheek softly as he drew the blanket back over them. 

“Now we can go back to sleep”

***

“You know I don’t think I’ve seen your place yet” Adam said later that morning. They were curled together on the large lounge sharing soft touches, the television playing softly in the background. While still concerned about everything that was going on, Adam felt relaxed, calmed by Kris’s secure touch.

“Yeah I was thinking about that actually” Kris replied, running his hand lazily along Adam’s bare arm. After their encounter in the bedroom he was feeling very close to the other man, joined somehow. 

“You were? Hey who’s looking after Nemo while you’re here?” Adam asked, flicking channels on the flat screen. Predictably he chose something on the E network. 

“Oh Nemo’s out at Mom and Dad’s, just while I’m here. He’s ok, she texted me this morning about him”

Adam sat up, his brows raised quizzically. “Your Mom texts you about the welfare of your dog?”

Kris slapped him. “Yes! And it doesn’t matter anyway, because we’re going to have dinner at my place tonight”

Adam chuckled and sighed softly, drawing Kris’s arm around him. After a while Kris kissed the top of his head, inhaling the spicy smell of Adam’s expensive shampoo. 

“What’s up?” he asked softly, instinctively knowing something wasn’t quite right. 

Adam sighed again and chewed his lip for a second. “Just thinking”

“Bout what?”

“Just about everything that’s happened. What if they never find this guy?” Adam asked, voicing a very real concern that had been gnawing at his mind for a while now. 

“They’ll catch him. Sooner or later he’s going to slip up. I’m sure David’s on top of it all back home” Kris said confidently. 

“Yeah. Mom hasn’t said anything else about it for a while now, maybe whoever it is has backed off. You know she was getting creepy pictures too?”

“Was she? That sick bastard, must have been awful for her”

Adam nodded and hummed, staring off out the window, watching the rain slide down the pane. It was claustrophobic in here. He needed to get out. 

“Let’s go out, let’s do something today. I have to get out of this house”

***

Kris ended up taking Adam shopping, which was a sure fire way to get his mind off his troubles – even if Conway didn’t have the expensive boutiques he preferred. He ended up finding a few eclectic pieces of furniture to add to his home back in LA – a lamp made out of an old curled piece of driftwood, an old gilt frame that would fit one of his art pieces perfectly, and a mirror that he fell in love with.

All up the antique pieces cost him about two thousand dollars, and Kris was surprised when Adam didn’t even blink, just handing over a black credit card and making arrangements to have the pieces shipped back to Los Angeles. Kris just waited patiently in the background, wondering if this sort of thing was normal for Adam. 

“What? You look a bit shocked” Adam stated once they’d finished up the store and were walking back down the sidewalk. Rain still beat heavily on the roofs overhead, running in small rivers in the gutters of the kerb. The weather had turned chilly too, and Adam was glad to have his coat and scarf. 

“Oh nothing, just never been shopping with a rockstar before” 

Adam grinned and reached for his hand, lacing their fingers together. “That was nothing. So what are we doing for dinner?”

“I think we should do take-out. There’s a great little Chinese place just down the road here. We could get some beers, just have a quiet night in”

“Sounds perfect”

Kris smiled and squeezed Adam’s hand, pleased that he was able to distract him, for at least an afternoon.


	18. 18

For Kris, the next few days involved spending as much time with Adam as he could manage – doing all kinds of things to keep him relaxed and calm and at ease with his situation. He knew the stalker was playing on Adam’s nerves, but he didn’t bring it up again, and he did his best to keep him occupied so he wouldn’t dwell on things. 

For the most part it seemed to be working and Kris was a little surprised that being with a partner could be so easy. Sure he’d had a boyfriend once before, but being with Adam was entirely different. It was just so easy being with Adam, they fit together perfectly and not once did they squabble or fight. 

Adam loved Kris’s small apartment, especially the music room, which was decorated with all sorts of music memorabilia, old Elvis posters, an electronic keyboard and a mixing board so he could make his music. 

“Play me something” Adam demanded, flopping ungracefully into one of the black bean- bags that were scattered around the small room. 

“Like what?” Kris asked, picking up the instrument and sitting on the small wooden stool next to it. He’d been working on a little song ever since he’d revealed his feelings for Adam, but he’d never thought he’d share it – well not yet anyway. He wasn’t even sure it was any good. 

“I don’t know. I don’t play any instruments. Please” Adam lay back and gave him the most ridiculous puppy face that Kris burst out laughing. 

“Ok fine, this is um…something I wrote for you actually”

Adam’s face lit up. “For me? Kris no-one has ever written a song for me before”

Kris blushed, finding it hard to believe that there hadn’t ever been a verse penned about Adam’s eyes. 

“It’s only small, so don’t get too excited” he mumbled before strumming the opening chords to his little song. 

_“Today, I’m laughing the clouds away. I hear what the flowers say, and drink every drop of rain…”_

It was only a little song really, but the lyrics resonated with Adam so much that his eyes welled and his heart felt light. He’d never heard a song like this before, a sweet little melody that he knew would be stuck in his head for days. It was special, even more so because Kris wrote it. It came from his heart. 

Once the song finished he scrambled up out of the bean-bag and hugged Kris tightly, burying his face in the crook of his neck. 

“I love you so much” he whispered, his voice rough with unshed tears. 

“Oh hey, don’t cry love. That’s supposed to be a happy song. Hey” Kris said gently, feeling warmth on the skin of his neck. 

“I’m not sad, I’m just really glad I met you” 

Kris’s heart melted and he kissed Adam’s cheek softly. “I love you too. I’m glad you liked the song”

***

For Jeremy Styles the next few days were spent in careful contemplation. Since finding Adam in this small town he’d come to the realisation that he needed to have the star with him. Permanently. He couldn’t wait any longer, and so he spent his days lurking around the small house where he’d seen Adam previously.

Fortunately for Adam, (and unfortunately for Jeremy), he didn’t return to the small house, but the other young man did. Kris returned late one afternoon to collect a large German Sheppard that barked annoyingly and sniffed around the yard. Even though he didn’t like the dog, Jeremy was pleased because it meant he could follow Kris from now on. 

Quickly he jotted down the license plate and pulled out from the kerb, following Kris’s pickup as it trundled through town. He couldn’t see anyone else in the cab, so he knew Adam wasn’t with him. That was unfortunate, but couldn’t be helped. For now he was content following Kris as he drove through town and headed out onto the highway. 

Jeremy’s patience was rewarded when Kris pulled into a driveway of an impressive house, set back aways from the road and hidden (mostly) by tall trees. Jeremy didn’t follow him up the drive, just pulled onto the shoulder a few metres up and waited, watching. He could just make out Kris as he walked his dog around for a bit before he was joined by Adam. 

Ahh, his glorious Adam looked amazing as usual, dressed in grey jeans and a black turtleneck, his feet encased in white socks. A veritable vision, even casually dressed. He had to have him. Now. He couldn’t wait any longer, but how to get rid of the other guy? 

Jeremy sighed, wondering just how to do that, scratching his chin as he stared at the young lovers.

***

“Hey Nemo, hey boy” Adam said as he scratched the dog’s ears. He’d always wanted a dog, but had quickly realised he couldn’t have one – it wasn’t fair to an animal if he wasn’t at home most of the time. Nemo was the perfect solution though, and it was made even sweeter because he came with Kris.

“So, you gonna be ok out here tonight?” Kris asked, scratching the back of his head. He looked concerned and Adam was touched. Tonight would be the first night he’d be spending alone in his big house, since the fright at Kris’s parents house. 

“Yeah I’ll be fine. It’s all good” Adam said, trying to ignore the faint spike of tension that settled low in his stomach. He was going to be fine for God’s sake. He was a big boy, and while he loved Kris dearly, they didn’t need to be joined at the hip. He’d always been like that with past boyfriends, and while some had protested, he knew Kris wouldn’t mind. After all everyone needed their alone time. 

“Cool, well you know where I am and you’ve got my number so…”

Adam stood up, crossing the drive in his stockinged feet to envelope Kris in his arms. He loved that Kris was so concerned about him. 

“You don’t have to worry. I’ll be ok. I’m just going to have a quiet one, maybe watch a DVD or something”

Kris nodded, feeling a little sheepish. He didn’t want to be one of those annoying boyfriends who hovered, but he really was concerned. Adam had seemed so frightened a few days ago, he didn’t want him to spiral into outright terror. 

“Sorry, I don’t mean to be clingy”

Adam smiled and kissed him deeply, pulling back to gaze deep into his eyes until all the embarrassment leaked out of Kris’s face, replaced by something he couldn’t quite place. Was it pride? 

“It’s fine. I love that you’re so concerned, really. I love you so much. I’ll be ok”

Kris nodded. “Of course you will. It’ll be fine. You can hog the remote all you like”

Adam slapped his arm, mock hurt on his face. “Shut up I do not hog the remote. At least I don’t kick in my sleep like you do. We need to talk about your toe nail situation as well, I have bruises”

Kris laughed. “Get out. My toes are fine”

“Yeah fine, if you want to climb trees with them” 

“Oh my God will you shut up! Nemo we’re leaving. Come here, come on” Kris snapped his fingers at his dog, who was sniffing around in the flowerbeds. 

“Bruises Kristopher” Adam said seriously. 

Kris laughed again and started the car, making sure Nemo was secure inside the cab before he started backing out the drive. Adam waved once before he went to the door, flashing him a thumbs up before he slipped inside the house. 

Beside him Nemo looked at him balefully, animal wisdom shining in his brown eyes. Kris scratched his ears affectionately. 

“You worried about your new friend? So am I boy, but he’ll be ok”

_I really hope he’ll be ok_ Kris thought as he headed back to his apartment, trying not to think too hard about everything that could go wrong.

***

 

Back on the shoulder of highway Jeremy smiled in malicious glee, his eyes fixed on the house nestled among the trees. It looked as though Adam was on his own, but if he had his way that wouldn’t be the case. Not for much longer anyway. 

All he had to do was wait till it got dark.


	19. 19

Once Kris had left Adam made sure the front door was locked before he drew all the heavy curtains in the rooms, plunging the house into premature darkness. By himself he realised again just how quiet it was out here, and just how alone he was. He’d be fine though, everything was going to be fine, he was going to have dinner and watch a mindless rom-com then go to bed. Fine. 

Trying to fill the solitude, he slipped his iphone into the stereo dock and hit play on his favourite Goldfrapp album – Seventh Tree, the dulcet tones of Allison’s voice soon filling the space. There, that was better already he mused as he set about making dinner. 

Soon enough Adam lost all sense of time as he worked on his meal, singing along softly under his breath as he sliced celery and lettuce and chucked them all into a large mixing bowl. Sure it was great hanging out with Kris, but he didn’t mind being alone every so often. 

Once he’d eaten he took a long hot shower, luxuriating under the warm spray until the water ran cool. 

“Oops,” he chuckled as he towelled off, “sorry David”

His music had clicked over to another album by the time he got back out to the living room, dressed in his sleep clothes for the night, and he flicked it off, setting the phone on the side table as he perused the large movie selection, finally deciding on Love Actually. 

Settling back on the lounge, he flicked off all the lights until the house was illuminated by only one lamp, the sound of the rain making an oddly soothing melody as he watched the film. Once the sun went down he pulled a throw rug over himself, warding off the chill in the air. 

_See? Everything is fine._

***

Once the sun sank below the horizon, Jeremy grabbed a heavy jacket from the back of the car and quietly slipped from the vehicle, stealing down the drive, his excitement building. He hadn’t seen Adam leave, and he’d been sitting in that damn car for a few hours now, so it was pretty safe to assume that Adam was still inside. Perfect.

On cat-quiet feet he crept up to the front porch, making sure not to hit any of the squeaky boards as he hid at the window, peering in through a crack in the curtains. The television was on and he could see Adam resting comfortably on the lounge, in fact he looked like he was asleep and Jeremy felt a hot flash of desire steal over him. He had to have him, now was the moment. 

He’d just wait out here until Adam went to bed, then he’d find a way into the house. Adam looked close to going to bed now, so he shouldn’t have to wait too long. After all he was a patient man, he could wait a few more hours to have his prize. 

And he would have him, make no mistake of that.

***

It was after 1am before Adam finally dragged himself to bed, the movie well and truly over. He couldn’t believe he’d fallen asleep on the lounge, and for a couple of hours no less. Oh well he thought absently as he wandered down the hall to the bedroom, leaving the lights off as he slipped under the sheets – half asleep before he even hit the pillow.

He awoke an hour later when he felt the bed dip, making a soft sound in his throat as he brushed at his eyes. 

“Kris?” he mumbled, still half asleep. How had Kris gotten inside? He didn’t have a key – in fact no-one did. 

SHIT. 

“Hello Adam, I’ve been waiting for you for some time now” Jeremy said softly, his voice husky with desire. 

Adam panicked, scrambling away from the intruder, goose bumps breaking out on his skin as the other man moved to quickly overpower him – too quickly. Jeremy slammed his full weight onto Adam’s body, and in his still-drowsy state Adam didn’t respond quick enough. He was trapped. 

“Get off me, get away from me! SOMEBODY HELP!” Adam screamed when he realised he was trapped, held down at his arms by the other man, unable to move and unable to see because the bastard hadn’t turned the lights on. 

“Hush now Adam love, we don’t want anyone else here do we? After all you picked this place so we could be alone together didn’t you? You’re very thoughtful aren’t you hmmm?” Jeremy whispered, firmly holding Adam in place as he shifted above him, moving to straddle the singer, his dick hardening as he crouched over Adam’s groin. 

Adam struggled in vain against the other man, grunting as he bucked wildly, trying to dislodge the heavy weight. Tears pricked his eyes when he felt the other man’s penis digging into his crotch and he screamed again, trying in vain to get away. Who the fuck was this guy and what did he want?

“What do you want? What do you…want?” he cried breathlessly, forcing himself to lie still. 

Jeremy clamped his thighs around Adam’s hips and leant down to lick a stripe along the column of his throat, leaving a wet trail of saliva. The way Adam was struggling against him was a heady turn on and he ground his dick against Adam’s, reaching around so he could grasp both Adam’s wrists with one of his own, much larger hands. 

“I want you”

“Please…” Adam’s voice was hoarse and a tear slid down his pale cheek as he bucked again, trying unsuccessfully to throw Jeremy off. It was funny really, Adam was such a big man but Jeremy was stronger. Much stronger. 

“Shhh, I know you want me too. Just lie still now and it won’t hurt as much” Jeremy’s voice was soft now, and he reached down and slid a hand into Adam’s sleep pants, fondling his cock. 

As soon as he felt the man’s hand in his pants Adam went wild, screaming and kicking with all his might as he was violated – the other man seemingly in no rush as he continued to touch him. Vomit burned up Adam’s throat and he panicked in earnest when he felt the man’s fingers at his ass, probing him. 

“No, no get off me…get OFF ME!” he bellowed, twisting his hips and finally managing to get one of his knees up into the guy’s groin. Jeremy grunted in surprised pain when Adam kneed him, his grip momentarily loosening as he reached to reflexively hold himself. 

Seizing his chance Adam scrambled off the bed and bolted down the hall, hitting the wall several times in the dark. Tears were streaming down his cheeks and his breath was coming in short hard pants as he ran through the dark house, terrified of who was behind him. He could hear the other man yelling as he stumbled after him, but Adam made it outside quickly, slamming the door shut. 

The cold hit him first and he started shivering under his inadequate sleep clothes, feeling the frigid air bite into his skin. He had to get away, find a car or anything and get the fuck away from the house. Now. 

Unfortunately Jeremy had found the front flood light, and Adam was momentarily blinded when the yard was flooded with bright light, raising a hand to shield his eyes. Jeremy used the distraction and tackled Adam to the ground, snarling with rage when Adam fought back. 

“Get off me” Adam yelled again as they rolled in the dirt, hands flying as he tried to gain the upper hand. He’d never been much of a brawler, even with his impressive height and he quickly found himself overpowered once again as the other man got his hands around his throat, squeezing the life out of him. 

“I wanted you, we were meant to be together and you fucking ruined it all! I waited for you and sent you gifts and you never responded to me. Why didn’t you write me!” Jeremy’s voice rose in pitch as he throttled the singer, spittle flying from his mouth as he screamed the final words in Adam’s terrified face. 

Beneath him Adam struggled, his vision fading, his lungs burning as he tried to wrestle the other man off. Frantically he felt around the ground for anything he could use as a weapon and his questing fingers finally found a rock that he banged futilely against the man’s head. However it didn’t appear to be working, the man kept spewing filth at him, his voice echoing in the darkness and mustering his final ounce of strength Adam swung his fist and smashed the rock against the man’s temple. 

Thankfully his final swing had hit its mark and Jeremy slumped down atop him, blood seeping from a cut in his temple. He was unconscious and once Adam had regained his breath he pushed the body off him and rolled away, fighting off the weakness that stole through him. 

Coughing heavily Adam lurched to his feet and stumbled away from the fallen intruder, a soft whimper falling from his lips, the tears falling in earnest now as he started limping down the drive, his traumatized mind turning to the only thing that could possibly make this night bearable. 

He had to get to Kris. 

Unfortunately he didn’t have a car, so he did the only thing he could do. 

He started running.


	20. 20

The first thing Kris did when he heard Nemo barking, was to glance at the digital clock on his nightstand. It was just after 2am and he’d been having the weirdest dream, something about Adam and circus performers when Nemo started going off. Normally he was a very quiet dog, so Kris knew something was up. He didn’t bark like this for nothing. 

“Nemo! Quit it will ya?” he grumbled as he threw back the blanket and padded down the hall, flicking on the light as he went. It was only then that he realised there was someone banging loudly on the door, a steady thumping. 

Frowning Kris crossed to the front door and looked through the peephole, surprised and shocked to see a rather bedraggled looking Adam standing on his front step. He couldn’t get a decent glimpse through the fish eye lens, but he opened the door, a surprised gasp falling from his lips when Adam all but fell into his arms. 

“Adam? Baby, whoa hey, what’s up? What’s the matter sweetheart?” he asked, wondering what had Adam so worked up. He was covered in sweat and dirt and more disturbingly, blood. 

“He was in my house, he was…and I couldn’t…I couldn’t…” Adam stammered, his voice hoarse and cracked, his breathing way too fast for Kris’s liking. There was dirt on his cheek and his eyes were darting around like he was expecting to be jumped at any moment. He looked on the verge of total collapse. 

“Adam look at me babe, you’re safe here. What’s happened huh? Come on, oh my god your feet” Kris’s voice trailed off when he caught sight of Adam’s torn and bloody feet. 

“Oh Kris…” Adam choked out, wilting before his eyes. His knees buckled and Kris quickly caught him before he hit the ground, steadying him before half carrying him to the sofa. Adam was still panting and he was shivering hard, his teeth chattering together as he drew very shaky breaths. It looked as though he was having an anxiety attack. 

“It’s alright babe, it’s alright. Just breathe for me Ad, just breathe, nice and slow that’s it. Come on…” Kris soothed him, rubbing soothing circles on his back as Adam tried to get his breath back. 

“I can’t…I can’t…I have to get…not safe…” Adam was mumbling, not hearing Kris’s words of comfort. 

“Adam? You have to listen to me ok? It’s me, _it’s me_ you’re safe here. You’re safe sweet, you’re ok. Come on…shhh” Kris wasn’t sure what to do: Adam wasn’t hearing him and was growing paler by the second. His eyes were glassy and wide, tears rolling down his cheeks. 

Making a snap decision, Kris reached for the phone and dialled 911. Beside him Adam continued to repeat himself, stumbling over his words and gripping Kris’s hand so tightly it was starting to hurt. This was bigger than Kris could handle, he didn’t know what had happened to push Adam over the edge like this, but he needed to calm him down. 

“911 what’s the nature of your emergency?” 

Kris swallowed. “Hi um, my name’s Kris Allen and I need an ambulance. My partner’s having an anxiety attack and I can’t calm him down”

“What’s your address sir?”

“ahh 22 Longfellow lane. Please hurry I don’t know what to do”

“An ambulance has just been dispatched. Would you like me to stay on the line with you until they arrive?”

Kris stroked Adam’s clammy hand, wondering why he was dressed only in his sleep clothes. No wonder he was freezing. What had happened?

“Sir?”

“Oh, yes please. What should I do? He’s awake, but he’s not hearing me. Something’s happened…but I’m not sure what. I don’t know how to calm him down”

“Keep talking to him, keep assuring him he’s safe and you’re not going to let anything happen”

Kris put the phone on speaker and set it on the table before gripping both Adam’s hands in his, chafing them rapidly. 

“Come on baby, you gotta calm down for me ok? Come on Adam…you’re ok here: I’m not going to let anything happen to you alright? It’s gonna be ok” Kris soothed, grabbing a blanket from the back of the lounge and wrapping it around Adam’s shaking shoulders, drawing him close. 

Finally it seemed to be working: Adam stopped muttering to himself and loosed a big breath, coughing harshly. Thinking quickly Kris grabbed a bowl and was just in time in placing it under Adam’s chin as he vomited, whimpering pathetically. 

“Is everything alright Sir?” the dispatcher asked kindly. 

“Yeah I think we’re ok now. The ambulance has just rocked up too. Thank you so much” Kris said, waving the two paramedics inside. 

“Hello, is everything ok?” one of them asked, kneeling down beside Adam. 

“He’s just had a big panic attack, but I think he’s ok now. I didn’t know what to do” Kris said apologetically, still rubbing Adam’s back. 

“That’s ok. What’s your name?” the medic asked Adam. 

“It’s Adam” Adam’s voice was very small. 

“Is it ok if I examine you Adam?”

Adam nodded slowly and grimaced when he set the bowl on the floor. Kris disposed of it quickly before coming back to the sofa, watching as the medic checked Adam’s blood pressure and his eyes and general health. 

“What happened tonight Adam?”

Adam cleared his throat and took a shaky breath, wiping his face. “There was someone in my house. He was going to…but I got away and came here. I had to come here”

“How’d your feet get so torn up?”

Adam blinked and released a flood of tears. “I was running, I didn’t have time to grab my shoes”

Kris’s heart broke then and he reached for Adam’s hand, squeezing it gently. 

The medic nodded. “Do we need to call the police?”

“I don’t know”

The other medic took Kris aside then, but Kris kept close to Adam just in case. 

“I think he’s going to be ok. He shouldn’t need the hospital tonight, just some home care from you. Has he got a history of anxiety disorders?”

“I’m not sure. I’m his boyfriend: we’ve only been seeing each other for about 5 months now. I’ve never seen him this frightened before” Kris admitted. 

“It might be a good idea to get him checked by a doctor in the next week or so. He seems very fragile right now, so the best thing to do would be to just keep him quiet and warm”

“I’ll look after him”

“It looks like most of his injuries are superficial, and it’s ok if you want to get him clean and warm before you dress them. He’ll probably feel better after a shower”

Kris nodded and watched as the other medic packed up his bag, patting Adam’s shoulder briefly before he joined them. He handed Kris a plastic zip lock bag with one small white pill inside it. 

“This is a fairly strong sedative. You can give it to him after he’s cleaned up. He’ll be ok, just needs some TLC. I’m confident that he doesn’t have to go to hospital, but a visit to the doctor might be a good idea”

Kris shook both their hands, eager to get back to Adam. “Thank you so much”

“Good night” 

Kris sighed as he shut the door behind them, turning back to Adam who hadn’t moved from the lounge. He was calm now, but still very pale. 

“Come here” Kris murmured, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close. Adam rested against him wearily, closing his eyes against the pain that was washing over him. Now that the adrenaline had abated he was exhausted and in quite a lot of pain. He hadn’t realised his feet were so torn up, but running flat out for almost an hour on the asphalt had severely damaged his poor feet. 

“Sorry” he mumbled, not really knowing what he was apologising for. He could still feel that guys hands on his throat and cock, his finger probing him. He shivered. 

“Let’s get you in the shower huh? Can you manage it?” Kris asked, standing slowly. 

Adam nodded but stumbled as soon as he stood, biting his lip in frustration. Kris’s bathroom seemed miles away and truthfully, he wasn’t sure he could walk there. Crawl maybe, but that would be too degrading, especially given the night’s events. 

Without saying a word Kris slipped his arms around him and took most of his weight, keeping up his soft words of encouragement as he helped him down the hall to the bathroom. His ruined sleep clothes were thrown into a pile in the corner of the room as Kris set the water in the shower going, (not too hot). 

“Can you…would you mind…” Adam seemed unable to finish his sentence, and Kris nodded, knowing what he meant to ask. 

“Of course. I’ll get in first so you don’t slip over”

Kris left his boxers on as he stepped into the shower, sensing that something had gone on that Adam hadn’t told him about yet. He’d have to ask him in the morning – well later in the morning. Right now Adam needed some TLC and that was what he was going to give him. Gently he soaped up the loofah and ran it over Adam’s freckled skin, taking note of the bruises and scratches on his body. He could see various marks on his arms and wrists and most disturbingly, what looked to be finger-shaped bruises on his neck. 

What had happened tonight?

Slowly Adam lifted his poor feet and washed away the blood and dirt, wincing as the warm water touched the broken skin. Almost all the skin on the bottom of both feet was ripped away and it really fucking hurt. His neck was aching too and it hurt to speak. 

Once he was clean Kris helped him into another set of sleep clothes that he’d forgotten to take home and laid him down on top of the sheets, pulling out the first aid kit so he could dress his feet. Once they were all bandaged up he dutifully took the pill the medics had left before he snuggled down into the bed, one final thought occurring to him before he drifted off. 

“Kris I think we should call the police. I knocked that guy pretty hard on the head and he might be hurt. Can you call them?”

Kris kissed his forehead. “Of course. I’ll get them to go out and check out the house. You don’t have to worry sweetheart: I’m here. Just close your eyes.”

Adam nodded and did just that. In minutes he was sound asleep and Kris left him to call the cops, lingering down in the living room so as to not wake Adam. He told the cops what he knew (which wasn’t a whole lot) and they agreed to send a squad car out to check out Adam’s house. 

“I’ll be here all day if you need to call me, or come in. Thank you officer”

With that settled Kris locked the front door and brought Nemo inside, spending a few quiet moments with the dog before he went back to bed, curling in beside Adam and vowing to always keep him safe. 

Just as he drifted off it occurred to him that it may have been Adam’s stalker who’d found him, and he wondered how he’d been discovered. 

He’d completely forgotten about the photo at the zip line centre and how it had quickly gone viral – a sign for the adoring public that their beloved singer was alive and well, and a beacon for Jeremy Styles. That photo, even while taken in a moment of innocent fun, had really been the cause of this whole mess tonight.


	21. 21

It was almost eleven when Kris woke again and he immediately shut his eyes again, rolling over in order to sneak a few more moments of precious sleep. His brain still felt foggy from the morning’s events, but the comforting weight of Adam beside him assured him that yes, it had happened. Unfortunately. 

Beside him Adam slept on and Kris let him, taking a moment to gaze fondly at him, taking note of the dark bruises on Adam’s neck. To Kris’s untrained eye they still looked like finger marks, but he had to wait for Adam to wake up before he started jumping to conclusions. He had to know for sure what had happened, and he also had to talk to the Police again. 

Pulling the blanket back up, he let Adam sleep and wandered downstairs, tidying up the kitchen a little bit before he cooked a simple breakfast and sat at the table, trying not to think too hard about what had happened. Just as he was putting his plate away he noticed the little red light was flashing on the answering machine, and he held his breath as he picked it up. 

“Hello Mr Allen, this is Detective Inspector James Franklin. I was called out to a residence on Parade Drive last night following your claims of a home invasion. I have some information that is quite important, so please call me as soon as you get this message. Thank you.”

Kris hung up, wondering what the detective could have found at Adam’s house. Hopefully it wasn’t anything too serious, but Kris wasn’t overly confident of that. Even the paramedic’s had said Adam seemed fragile and needed looking after, and Kris was driving himself mad needing to know. 

Sighing softly he went back to the bathroom and showered quietly before slipping on casual clothes and heading into his music room, grabbing his guitar and plonking down into his favourite beanbag. Absently he started strumming a tune, letting all his fear and worry leak out through his fingertips to the music he was playing.

***

Adam woke to the soft sounds of guitar and an equally soft voice, a voice so sweet that it seemed to pull him gently from slumber. Weak sunlight filtered in through the curtains and he stared groggily around the room, only just remembering he was in Kris’s house. Everything felt foggy and it felt like his body was made of cement – all save for his feet and neck, which ached and burned painfully.

Wincing, he cleared his throat and sat upright: swallowing painfully. Man his throat hurt and he rubbed it absently as he listened to soft footsteps coming down the hall. Hopefully that sick bastard hadn’t damaged his vocal chords when he tried to throttle him. 

Slowly the door opened and Kris peered inside. “Hey baby, how you feeling?”

Adam managed a smile, but it must have looked fake because Kris came to sit with him on the bed, pulling him into his arms. Closing his eyes Adam rested against him for a moment, trying and failing to shut everything out. His whole body hurt. 

“I’m ok, kinda feel like I got hit by a truck, but I’m ok” he whispered. 

Kris hugged him tighter, running his arms gently along Adam’s skin, almost reverently. 

“I was so scared” he whispered, his voice muffled. 

“Hey I’m ok, a bit banged up but I’m ok. I’m sorry for collapsing on you last night” 

Kris sat back, brushing quickly at his eyes. “You’ve got nothing to apologise for. God I shouldn’t be saying this to you right now, you must have been terrified last night. Do you remember what happened?”

Adam nodded. “Yeah, it’s kind of foggy, but I remember. I’ll tell you, but I have to pee first, and maybe eat. Could you help me up?”

Kris nodded and slipped his hands under Adam’s armpits, slowly helping him to a standing position. Grunting softly as his battered feet took his whole weight, Adam hobbled (with Kris’s help) to the bathroom. 

“What do you want to eat? Cereal, toast, pancakes. I could do eggs?” Kris asked, handing Adam a cup of honeyed tea once he’d sat down in the kitchen. 

“Scrambled eggs would be lovely thankyou” Adam sighed appreciatively when the warm brew slid down his throat, touched by Kris’s attentiveness. The tea was just the right temperature for drinking, not too hot, not too cold. Just right. 

The kitchen was quiet while Kris prepared Adam’s breakfast and Adam stared out the window at the grey sky, wondering what had happened to the man who’d assaulted him. He knew it was a bit twisted, but he hoped he hadn’t hurt him too badly with the rock, even though the guy had probably planned to rape him. 

He shuddered when he remembered the feel of that guy’s hands on his body, the sick cold realisation that he was totally helpless. He wasn’t used to feeling like that and he didn’t like it. Something had to be done, he couldn’t keep torturing himself like this. What kind of man was he if he let something like this torment him?

“Here you go” Kris said a moment later, setting the plate of scrambled eggs down before joining him at the table. Absently he played with an apple from the fruit bowl and sipped his second cup of coffee. 

“Did you call the Police last night?” Adam asked once he’d made a dent in his breakfast. 

“Yeah, one of the Detectives called me back this morning saying they had some sort of information. I’ll ring them back in a sec. I just…I just wanted to get your side of things”

Adam nodded. “Yeah, guess I didn’t explain what happened last night very well did I?”

“It’s ok” Kris said gently, reaching out to grasp Adam’s hand. 

Adam sighed deeply and winced as he cleared his throat, chewing his lip for a moment before he started talking. 

“I spent most of the night doing just what I told you I’d be doing – watching a movie and chilling out, but I fell asleep on the lounge. I ended up dragging myself to bed after the movie had finished and I don’t know how long I was asleep for, before I felt someone there”

“Someone there?” Kris echoed. 

Adam nodded. “Yeah, they sat on the side of the bed and I thought it was you at first. Then I realised that I haven’t given anyone a key, and he started talking and I panicked. He held me down and got…got all in my face yelling and screaming about how much he loved me. I couldn’t get away from him, he was too strong”

Kris didn’t know what to say, so he just held Adam’s hand. 

“I don’t know how I got away from him, I tried to knee him in the balls and I guess it must have worked because he let up but not before…” Adam’s voice trailed off and his eyes went glassy, tears hovering in the cerulean depths. 

“Before?”

“Kris I think he was going to…I think he was going to rape me” Adam’s voice ended in a whisper and the tears slipped from his eyes to roll down his cheeks. 

Oh my God Kris’s throat hurt as he moved around the table to hold Adam tightly, pressing his lips to the top of his head. He hadn’t realised Adam had almost been sexually assaulted, and he knew if he’d been told last night he would have ripped the culprit limb from limb. How fucking dare they break into Adam’s home and do this to him? 

“He didn’t though, he just…felt around I guess. I got away before he could get too far. I managed to get outside before he tackled me. I didn’t get away so easily the second time, and he had his hands around my throat. I had to use a rock to get him off me”

Kris made a soft sound in his throat and continued to run his hands gently up and down Adam’s arms, horrified at what had happened. 

“That’s when I started running. I had to get away, and you were the first person I thought of. I didn’t know if he was behind me or not, so I just kept going. I don’t know how many times I fell over, but I was too scared to stop. Seeing your front door was about the best feeling in the world”

Kris kissed the top of Adam’s head again. “I could hear Nemo going crazy and I didn’t know what to think. He normally never barks much. I couldn’t believe it when you were there”

Adam nodded and brushed at his cheeks. “I didn’t know where else I could go”

“I’m glad you came here, I’ll always be here” Kris whispered fervently. 

Adam closed his eyes, relieved at those words. There was some small (well, rather large) part of himself that believed Kris wouldn’t want anything more to do with him. After all who would want to be with a basket case celebrity? Who’d want to put up with his emotional breakdowns and hectic schedule? 

“What do I do now?”

Kris sighed softly. “We call the police”


	22. 22

Adam rested back on the lounge while Kris called the Police back, talking quietly with the detective for a moment before he hung up. 

“He wants us to go into the station. You have to give a statement and I think he wants to go back to your house so you can go over the details. He didn’t say much else” 

Adam sighed but nodded, standing slowly. “Ok, guess I better get dressed. Walking around is gonna be fun today”

“I’ve got some ugg boots you can wear. They’re not overly stylish, but they’ll be easy on your feet” Kris said, his arm around Adam’s waist as they went slowly down the hallway back to the bedroom. 

“Sure. Thankyou. I don’t know what else I’m gonna wear, all my clothes are back at the house” Adam said, running a hand through his hair. 

“Well I might have kept hold of this particular shirt from when you were here last” Kris admitted, throwing a black long-sleeved shirt at him. 

“Sick” Adam chuckled. 

Kris blushed and got dressed, adding a warm jacket to ward off the chilly winter air. It seemed winter had definitely arrived in Conway, and he hoped they wouldn’t get too much snow this year. Snow was lovely, but it was a pain in the ass. 

Once they were dressed Adam slipped on Kris’s ugg boots, grimacing as he pulled them over his feet. Oh well, at least they weren’t an ugly colour he mused as he stared at himself in the mirror. His clothes from the night before were all but ruined, so he was dressed in a pair of grey track pants and his black shirt, the ugg boots on his feet. 

“Ugh I look like a bum” he sighed, wrapping one of Kris’s grey scarves around his bruised neck. This ensemble was a far cry from his usually well -put together outfits, but he didn’t have any other choice. Hopefully the police would let him have his clothes from the house. 

“Yes, but a very attractive bum. You look fine honey, a bit battered and pale still, but fine” Kris assured him, kissing his cheek. 

Adam rested his head in the crook of Kris’s shoulder for a moment, taking comfort from the feel of his arms around him. 

“It’s going to be fine” Kris whispered after a while. 

Adam gave him a wry smile then, and brushed his un-styled hair back off his forehead. 

“Lets go see what they have to say”

***

The Conway Police station was relatively quiet this time of afternoon and Kris and Adam were able to get inside and take a seat without having to wait. It seemed there was little criminal activity going on in Conway this afternoon, and the Detective came to fetch them not long after they arrived.

“Hello I’m Detective inspector James Franklin, it’s nice to meet you” he said seriously once he’d shut the door to a cramped interview room. They both shook his hand before he sat down. 

“Now what name is the residence at Parade Drive under?” Franklin asked, perusing a file. 

Adam spoke up. “It belongs to David Harris, but I’ve been living there for a few months now. I was there last night, I know what happened”

“How’d you come to be living there?”

Adam sighed softly and relayed the whole tale to the Detective, detailing everything about the stalker and what had happened last night. 

“And you believe it was your stalker who broke in?”

“Yes, now that I think about it. No-one else knows I was there, we kept everything pretty quiet. No-one has a key save for David, and he’s in LA. I was there alone”

“How could he have located you if like you said, you kept things pretty quiet?” Franklin asked, not unkindly. 

Adam shrugged. “I don’t know, I mean I don’t hang around in town much, I don’t do anything. We went to the movies a few times, and out to dinner but that’s it”

Suddenly Kris sat up. “We went to that zip lining centre out at Ponca. Sam took our photo”

Adam felt the colour drain from his face. “Oh my God we did. I never even thought of that”

“So you’re saying there is a photo of you in Arkansas?” 

“Yeah, a little while ago we went to a zip lining place in Ponca. They took our photo for their website. I never even thought about it till now. We have to get it taken down”

Kris nodded and reached for Adam’s hand under the table. Even though he knew it wasn’t true, he couldn’t help but feel partly responsible for what had happened. After all he’d been the one to take Adam to Ponca anyway. 

Franklin continued taking notes for a moment before he looked up. 

“So you say your manager has been in contact with the LAPD in regards to your stalker. I’ll get in contact with them and we can discuss what to do next. I’ve worked on a few high profile celebrity cases like yours and you can feel confident that we’ll take this very seriously. Are you prepared to give a statement today?”

“Sure, but um can I have a glass of water please?” Adam asked, touching his sore neck. 

“Of course, give me a moment” Franklin disappeared back into the hallway for a minute, leaving them alone. 

“I need to call David, tell him what’s happened” Adam said, running his hand through his hair again. Sighing softly he slipped off his scarf and set it on the table, fiddling with the edge of it as Franklin returned, setting a Styrofoam cup down in front of him. 

“Thanks” Adam said, taking a sip. 

“Are you ready to begin?”

Adam nodded and started talking, going back through what had happened the night before, sparing no grisly detail. Franklin took notes the entire time and it was a good hour before they finished up at the station. 

“Detective can I ask you something?” Adam asked once he’d finished giving his statement. 

“Of course”

“Would it be ok if I got some clothes from the house? I sort of left in a hurry and I don’t have anything with me”

“I don’t see a problem with it, as long as I accompany you. The house hasn’t been touched, save for when I went over there earlier. We’ll get another team in to dust for prints, but it looked pretty clean. There was a rental car parked out the front on the highway and we’re looking into the records, so hopefully that should bring something up. We found blood consistent with the injury you said you inflicted, and your story checks out with the ambulance service. We’re running the blood through our system but it could take a number of days before we get a result. That's the primary reason I wanted to call you in today, to put your side of the story down on paper and to go through some finer details.”

“That’s fine, you’re working as hard as you can” Adam said as he shuffled along down the hall, Franklin and Kris politely keeping in-step. 

“I recommend you stay with someone while you’re here, just for support”

“He’ll be staying with me” Kris piped up, reaching for Adam’s hand again.

“That’s good. Why don’t you wait in here while I bring the squad car round the front?”

Adam nodded and they sat down again, Kris sitting opposite him so he could rest his feet on his knees. 

“Thank God that’s over. Hopefully this guy’s DNA is on record and we can finally know who he is” Adam said, staring out the window at the pavement. 

“Yeah” Kris said softly, and it was obvious he was still thinking about the reason for Adam’s exposure. Adam reached for his hand. 

“Hey it’s not your fault that Sam took that photo. I wasn’t thinking. I was having way too much fun to even worry about it all. It was a great day”

Kris made a face. “Yeah but I don’t know, I still feel kinda bad about it. None of it would have happened if I hadn’t insisted we go”

“I had a great day there, it was an amazing thing to do. You showed me that day that I could trust you”

Now Kris’s cheeks turned faintly pink and he looked bashfully out the window. “It was pretty fun”

Adam smiled. “It was amazing fun”

Just then Franklin’s Police cruiser pulled up to the kerb and they went out to meet it, feeling a little weird as they were driven back out to Adam’s house. Adam felt a shiver of trepidation as he made his way slowly down the drive to the front door, which was still open from the night before. 

Inside the place was relatively unscathed, save for the few things he’d knocked over in his haste to get out. A crystal vase was shattered in the hallway and he stepped gingerly around it as they went to the bedroom, Kris holding tightly to his hand. 

The sheets were still rumpled and Adam gripped Kris’s hand as he paused for a moment, memories washing over him. Hands around his neck…weight pressing him into the mattress…warm breath ghosting by his cheek…the hard stab of an erect penis in his groin…

“Come on” Kris whispered, pulling him away from the painful thoughts and steering him toward the walk-in closet. 

Quickly he grabbed a messenger bag and shoved a few clothes inside along with a few other items he wanted with him. He had no idea if he’d ever want to come back to this house, but he knew he couldn’t stay with Kris forever. Maybe it was time to go back to LA? Maybe he should go home?

That was a painful thought though – he didn’t want to leave Kris, and on some level he didn’t want to leave his relative anonymity here. Everything was fucked up and once again he didn’t know what to do. 

“Ok I’ve got what I want” he said a moment later, grabbing his jacket and phone off the hall table, pulling the charger out of the wall to shove in his pocket as he shuffled back down the front steps. 

He stayed quiet as Franklin drove them back to the station, trying not to think too hard about everything that had happened. What the hell was David going to say? He wasn’t exactly relishing that little conversation, but he promised himself that he’d ask for a bodyguard to be sent down, fuck the cost. He wanted to feel safe again. 

Once they got back to the station Franklin loitered for a moment on the pavement. 

“Well I think that’s all we need you for today Adam. I’m sure you’ve got measures to ensure your safety but I want you to have this. It’s got my personal number on the back, which I want you to call at any time if you need. The results of the DNA scans and bloods will take a few days, and I’ll be sure to contact you once we get some news. Do you have any questions?”

Adam took a breath and stared off over Franklin’s shoulder for a moment, squinting in the bright sun. 

“I’m not sure when I’ll be needed back in Los Angeles for work. Do you need to be contacted if I have to leave the state?”

Franklin nodded. “Yes, that way we can work with the LAPD. You don’t have to come in, a phone call will suffice”

“Alright. Like I said I’m not sure when it’s going to happen, but I just wanted to know”

“Very good. Well if you don’t have any other questions, I’ve got to get back in there. You take care now guys. I’ll be in touch” Franklin said, shaking both their hands again before he lumbered off back inside the station, leaving Adam and Kris on the pavement. 

“Let’s go home love” Kris said softly.


	23. 23

Things were very quiet for them for the next few days, Adam spent his time relaxing and healing, and Kris helped him, but inside his mind was wandering. He hadn’t really thought of Adam ever going back to Los Angeles, it had shocked him when Adam had suggested it to the police. He supposed it had to happen eventually though, LA was Adam’s home, and where he worked so it made perfect sense that he had to return there. 

The problem was Kris didn’t want him to. 

He didn’t know how to bring it up with Adam either, so he stewed on it for a bit, unsure how to proceed. There was no question of him leaving Adam, but he wasn’t sure a long-distance relationship would work out. In his limited knowledge they were never really successful, but he didn’t want to let Adam go. He was too special. 

“You ok baby?” Adam asked late one afternoon, two days after their visit to the police station. They were relaxing in front of the television: Adam curled up on the sofa in front of a space heater, Kris just checking on their dinner. 

“Yeah why?”

Adam shrugged. “I don’t know, you’re pretty quiet today. Just wondering”

Kris set the dish- towel on the counter and went to the sofa, sighing as he crawled into the space between Adam’s arms. Adam made a soft sound in his throat and wrapped him in his comforting embrace, resting his head on Kris’s shoulder. 

“What’s up?” he asked softly. 

Kris chewed on his lip for a moment. “I was just thinking I guess”

“About what?”

Kris paused. “About how you’re going to have to go back to LA and I’m going to have to stay here”

Adam swallowed and tightened his hold on the smaller man. The same thought had been swirling around in his head ever since he’d spoken to the police. There was one solution, but he had yet to voice it to Kris. Maybe now was the time?

“I was thinking about that too, but I think I’m thinking of something different to you though”

Kris turned to face him. “You are?”

Adam nodded and kissed him gently, tracing his dear face with his fingertip. He was so special to him – like the other half of his heart. 

“Come with me. Come to Los Angeles with me”

Kris’s eyes widened and he sucked in a surprised breath. Never had he imagined Adam would ask him something like this, (even while secretly he wished he would). For him the decision was remarkably simple. 

“Yes”

Adam blinked. “Really? You’d just drop everything here?”

Kris glanced around him. “What have I got here, well apart from my parents? I’ve finished college: I can arrange to transfer my music students to another teacher. Nemo can come with us. Why do you look so surprised?”

Adam laughed and Kris’s heart felt light at the sound. 

“Sounds like you’ve got it all worked out then. Were you just waiting for me to ask you?”

Kris blushed and stared down at their joined hands, playing idly with Adam’s fingers. 

“I didn’t want to be presumptuous”

Adam kissed the side of his head. “You could never be presumptuous. I’ve been thinking about asking you for a while now, I just didn’t know how to say it. I don’t want to be selfish, and this is pretty much the most selfish thing I’ve ever done”

“It’s not selfish, don’t think of it like that. Moving to LA to be with you would probably make my career, or starting my career a whole lot easier. I’d be moving for myself too”

Adam hugged him, burying his face in Kris’s shoulder. “I love you”

Kris turned to face him so they could kiss properly, lips and tongues pressing together, licking with renewed vigour. Kris melted into Adam’s arms, cupping his cheeks as he sucked on his bottom lip, moaning softly. 

“I love you so much” he whispered. 

Adam grinned and kissed him again, feeling a tiny glimmer of hope pierce his heart. With Kris beside him he felt like he could conquer his demons, felt like he could fight them off with the love he held in his heart. 

With Kris he could do anything.

***

Later that day Adam called David, who seemed to know frighteningly little about what had happened to him recently. Adam had been under the impression that the police would talk to him, but apparently they hadn’t yet.

“Yes David, look I thought the cops were going to talk to you about what had happened?” Adam asked, pacing the living room and staring off into the front yard, watching Kris throw a ball for Nemo. 

“No-one’s told me anything Adam, I had no idea what happened, are you alright?”

“Yeah, I guess so, kinda banged up and scared out of my mind sometimes, but I’m dealing” Adam admitted, trying to ignore the spikes of anxiety he could feel in his stomach. Even though he didn’t know when he’d have to return to LA, he was a little worried about it. 

“I’m glad you’re ok. I’m sure the cops will contact me soon, if they need to. I’m ah, glad you asked them about what happens when you have to come home too”

“Yeah? Time to bring me out of self-imposed exile?” Adam tried to lighten his tone, but it failed and he ended up sounding petulant. 

“I think you should come home. I don’t know if you’ve been following things in the industry, but the Grammy noms came out yesterday. You’re nominated for Best Male Pop artist. Congratulations”

Adam blinked, struck dumb. Him? Nominated for a Grammy in Best Male Pop artist? Holy shit. For him just being nominated was enough of an honour, but he’d never been included in this category before. Truthfully he didn’t think he would ever be up there with the greats. 

“Adam? You there?”

“Yeah I’m here. Holy shit, just trying to process. Oh my God. I don’t know what to say actually” Adam sat down stiffly, his eyes still trained on Kris. 

“You don’t have to say anything, just thanks when you win”

“Stop it” Adam said, not wanting to get ahead of himself. 

“I think you’re a real chance for this one, but yeah I also think it’s time you come home. I hate to cut your time down there short, but there’s a shit ton of promotional stuff that I can’t get you out of. We’ve got to get you back out there again”

“Yeah of course” Adam said distantly, still shocked at his nomination. 

“I know things are scary for you right now, but I’ve organised a security team to guard the house, and a personal bodyguard to accompany you when you’re out in public. No-one’s gonna get to you back here”

_No one should have been able to get to me here either_ Adam thought. 

“That’s good. When do you want me home?”

“As soon as possible really, I can book you a flight for the day after tomorrow?”

“Fine. I’ve got to let the cops here know where I’m going so they can get in contact with the LAPD as well, but other than that I’m good to go. Just have a few last minute things to organise”

“Ok great, well I’ll go ahead and book the flight and email you the details later on. Anything else?”

Adam chewed his lip for a second, debating whether to tell David about Kris. Two days wasn’t a long time for him to get his stuff organised, and he didn’t know if he’d want longer. 

“No, not right now. I’ll call ya if I need”

“Ok, look after yourself Ad, I’ll see you in a couple days” David said before he hung up. 

Adam sighed and set the phone down onto the table, gnawing on his thumbnail for a moment as he hobbled out to the yard. The fresh afternoon air hit him in the face and he drew his cardigan around his shoulders, watching Kris fool around with the dog. 

“Hey, what’s up?” Kris asked once he saw him. 

Adam smiled grimly and shuffled out to lean against the railing of the front steps. “Dave wants me back in LA, I um…I got nominated for a Grammy and I have a whole lot of stuff to do that he can’t get me out of”

Kris’s eyes widened as he came closer. “You got nominated for a Grammy? Holy shit, that’s amazing”

Adam allowed himself a little hop of excitement as Kris hugged him, still amazed that it had even happened. 

“Congratulations” Kris whispered, kissing him. 

“Thank you. There’s only one problem though”

“What?”

“Dave wants me back in LA in two days. I mean, if you’ve still got stuff to organise then it’s totally fine if you want to come later. I’ll just be doing promo stuff”

Kris silenced him with a kiss. “What time’s the flight?”


	24. 24

It wasn’t hard for Kris to say goodbye to Conway – not when he had Adam by his side. There comes a time in every young man’s life when he truly leaves the nest of his family, and Kris felt that now was the right time to say goodbye. His parents were sad to see him go, but they knew he wouldn’t be far and they were very excited for him. 

His few music students were disappointed that he would be leaving them, but they promised him they’d keep up their practising and he gave them his email address if they ever wanted to chat. The lease on his small unit wasn’t up for another month, but he had enough money saved to cover the rent until it was over. Most of his furniture went to the local goodwill, save for a few things that Adam paid to have shipped over to his house. In his short time at Kris’s house, Adam had grown fond of his sofa, and knew he’d find a place for it in his house. 

David was a little shocked when Adam called to inform him he’d need two tickets and an animal crate, but he booked another flight so they could leave together, well used to Adam’s spur-of-the moment decisions. He had no idea that Adam had found someone in Conway, but he had to admit it was nice to see them together. Adam had the biggest heart of anyone he knew, and he deserved to be loved unconditionally. 

Once they managed to get out of LAX airport Kris spent much of his time with his eyes wide open as he took in the sights of the warm, sultry city. He’d never been before, but he kept close behind Adam as they followed a burly security guard out of the busy terminal. Nemo didn’t seem to be affected by the flight at all: he kept close to his master as they strode through the parking lot.

The ever- present paparazzi that seemed to live on the grounds of the airport descended as they reached the car and Adam reached around to grab Kris’s hand, keeping him close as the camera’s flashed and loud questions were flung at him. He slipped his shades on as he waited for Kris to get inside before he was bundled into the car himself, the bodyguard forcing his way through the squawking people. 

“Holy crap” Kris muttered as they pulled out into traffic, horns honking in the almost-constant jam of vehicles. The late afternoon sun was warm on his cheek – very different from back home and he moved closer to Adam as they drove through the city. 

“It’s a bit like that huh?” Adam said, wincing as he slipped off his boots to check the bandages on his feet. One of them had ripped away and he was bleeding again. 

“Fucking hell” he grumbled, pressing a tissue to the wound. He’d been quiet and tense on the plane, and Kris worried he’d stress himself out too much again. 

Gently he slipped his arms around him and held him, pressing a kiss to his hair. After a beat Adam loosed a big breath and slumped in his arms. 

“It’s all going to be fine” Kris whispered, heedless of the driver and focussed only on Adam. 

“Yeah” To his surprise Adam’s voice was edged with tears and he held him closer, murmuring softly to him as they made their way up into the Hollywood Hills. 

Adam sniffed. “It’s just…I keep thinking you’re going to get tired of me, of all this shit. I’m not an easy man to live with”

“Hey, you forget we’ve been living together for a little bit. It’s been fine. You say you’re not easy to live with, but you’re easy to love. Don’t worry. I love you: I’m not going anywhere. We’re in this together”

Adam nodded and kissed him softly, reassured by his comforting words and presence. “Thank you. I love you so much”

Kris rubbed his back and glanced out the window, his mouth falling open when he caught sight of the house they’d just pulled up to. While it was smaller than a great many of the typical Hollywood mansions, it was no less impressive. 

“This is your house?”

Adam nodded and held his hand as they stood for a moment on the front step, giving Kris a chance to look around. The house was set back a little from the road and had impressive floor-to-ceiling windows that looked out over the well manicured lawns. Small sprinklers mounted in the flowerbeds cast gentle spray and Kris couldn’t wait to get Nemo out onto the grass. He’d love running around out there. 

Glancing around he noticed a spacious deck that wrapped around one side of the house, obviously continuing around to the back. He wondered if there was a pool as well and whistled through his teeth. 

“Wow”

Adam took his hand and opened the front door. “Come on, you haven’t seen the inside yet”

The interior of the house was almost as impressive as the exterior, with creamy carpeting, black leather lounges and an impressive flat-screen TV. The kitchen overlooked the living room and was decorated in a similar colour scheme, with a granite bench top and an impressive arrangement of white lilies graced the dining table. It was all very impressive, very Hollywood glamour – but to Kris it felt a little cold. 

“Do you get lonely here?” he asked Adam, who was checking the answering machine. 

Adam shrugged but Kris could that his comment had struck a nerve. He chewed his lip as he crossed to his lover’s side, wrapping his arms around him. 

“You don’t have to be lonely anymore”

Adam smiled and kissed him gently. “I know. Come on, I’ll show you the rest of the house”

“I still can’t believe you have all this space” Kris mused as they wandered around the rest of the house, pausing for a moment on the back deck with its stylish infinity pool. A balmy breeze ruffled his hair and he sighed in contentment. The distant blare of the constant LA traffic was muted here and it was like their own little slice of paradise – albeit a rather big slice. 

“Yeah I’ve lived here for a while now but I’m thinking of moving. Like you said it’s too big, even with two of us here now. I was thinking of moving into a condo maybe” Adam squinted into the sunlight, letting the rays warm his skin. 

“Sounds good. I’m up for whatever, as long as you’ll have me”

Adam slipped his arm around him. “I’ll always have you. Come on, I can see you’re dying to get Nemo out onto that grass”

Kris nodded and whistled for the dog while Adam wandered back inside. He seemed to have recovered a little from their run-in with the paparazzi but Kris promised to keep an eye on him. Hopefully all this pre-Grammy stuff wouldn’t be too taxing on his already unsteady nerves. 

Grudgingly Adam picked up his phone as he went back inside, dialling David’s number and checking his schedule for the upcoming week. The Grammy’s were two weeks away and as David had promised him, he had a lot of catching up to do. As a nominee he had to give a few performances and interviews as well as attend quite a few parties and such – the biggest of which was an appearance at the Clive Davies pre-Grammy bash. Holy shit – he’d been before of course, but this year felt much bigger. Maybe because David assured him he was in with a chance for the win. 

His first interview wasn’t scheduled until tomorrow morning though, so he had the rest of the afternoon to chill out and spend time with Kris. That would be nice. Once he’d sorted out his work itinerary he checked in with his mom, who seemed a little surprised to hear he was back in town. 

“Yeah, well Dave told me I was needed at all this pre-Grammy stuff – seeing as how I’m a nominee and all” he said sneakily as he poured himself a glass of water. 

“What? Oh Adam honey congratulations! Well done. We have to celebrate”

He smiled. “Thanks Mom, and yeah we do. You also have to meet Kris”

“Who’s Kris?”

“He’s my boyfriend actually. I told you I’d met someone in Conway, well he’s come home with me”

“Ah, so you did. I’ll definitely have to meet this boy then”

Adam rolled his eyes. “Yes Mother. Oh and I actually did read your dirty book. It’s crap Mom, total rubbish and it actually makes me insanely uncomfortable that you read it”

Leila laughed. “Oh Adam don’t be so delicate. At least you’ll have a conversation piece at all those parties you go to”

Now Adam laughed. “I hardly think I’ll be talking about my favourite scenes with Elton John Mama, oh god”

“Sir Elton may have read it” 

“I highly doubt that. Anyway are you free tomorrow night for dinner? We should go eat at that new place on Melrose”

“Sure sweetie, what’s it called again?”

Adam flicked open the newspaper that had been placed thoughtfully on the counter. “Taste. Say around 7pm? I can make a reservation”

“Perfect. Can’t wait to see you”

“You too mama. Bye now”

After he’d spoken with her he called the restaurant and made their dinner reservation before wandering back out to the yard where Kris was playing with Nemo. He kicked off his shoes and joined them, the grass cool beneath his feet. 

“Mom’s coming to dinner tomorrow night, she wants to meet you” he said after a moment, scratching Nemo’s ears. 

“Oh cool. Do I have to dress up for this dinner?”

“No it’s only us, just casual”

Kris nodded and stared off over the yard, breathing in the warm air. The late afternoon sun cast long shadows on the lawn and there were a few mosquitoes out. 

“So I guess if we’re going out to dinner, then we’re eating in tonight?”

“Yep. Help me up and I’ll get started” 

Kris slipped his arm around him as they walked back inside, Nemo trotting beside them. Already he could tell he was going to like LA


	25. 25

“So how’d you two meet?” Leila asked the next night. They were all gathered around the outdoor patio area of Taste restaurant, enjoying spicy Spanish Tapa’s. Kris’s lips were tingling a little from all the chilli, but he could tell Adam was having a good night, the beautiful sound of his lilting laughter echoing around the space. 

Sitting here opposite his mother Leila, Kris could see where he got his good looks. Leila was absolutely stunning, her dark hair glossy and long, worn loose about her neck. Delicate sapphire studs twinkled in her ears and she was generous with her words and attention. She was a smash, just like her son. 

“Well we met first in a supermarket, but Adam didn’t want anything to do with me, so I had to wait” Kris said, sipping his sangria. 

Adam laughed. “Hey hey, I left you hanging baby! Everyone knows you gotta treat em mean to keep em keen”

Now Kris laughed and rolled his eyes. “Sure sure. Pretty sure I’m not going to ever leave you now, even if you send me away”

Adam reached for his hand and twined their fingers together, pressing his lips to the back of Kris’s hand. 

“You’re stuck with me now”

Leila smiled and sipped her drink, suddenly feeling like she was intruding on a very private moment. Her heart was full to bursting with the love she felt for Adam – and by extension Kris. He was a lovely and charming young man, quietly spoken and grounded. In other words, exactly what her son needed right now. She was very happy for him. For them both. 

“So what’s next oh Grammy nominated one” she asked once the boys had turned their attention back to her. 

Adam sighed dramatically and waved a hand in the air. “Busy busy busy Mama. Got lots to do, another full day tomorrow”

“Huh, so will we be seeing you on any red carpets Kris?”

Kris shrugged. “I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it”

“You can come if you want, it’d be nice to have someone to talk to actually”

Kris smiled gently, hoping Leila hadn’t brought up an awkward topic. He had no idea if Adam wanted him along for his various appearances, but he’d be there if he was needed. It might be kinda fun to go to the Grammys actually. 

As if sensing she’d brought up a slightly awkward topic, Leila started on about something else, asking the two of them if they’d seen any decent films and generally keeping the conversation flowing. It wasn’t at all strained between them, but she could tell they’d be talking about it afterwards. 

Hopefully she hadn’t just put her foot in it.

***

“So what time do you have to be gone tomorrow morning?” Kris asked later that night as he was lying in bed. From where he lay he could see the broad expanse of Adam’s back in the bathroom mirror, could see him going about his nightly routine.

“Um, I think my first interview isn’t until 10am, so we can have a bit of a sleep in” Adam said as he finished up, flicking off the light and sliding between the covers. He smelled of toothpaste and the product he used in his hair – an intoxicating blend. 

“Do you want me to go with you to the Grammy’s?” Kris asked after a while, cuddling closer and drawing Adam’s arm over his chest. 

Adam sighed. “Honestly? Yeah I do, but I wasn’t sure you’d want to go with me, and it’s kind of selfish again”

“Why?”

“Well for me, even though it’s a party and we get all glammed up – its still work. I wouldn’t want you to get bored”

“I don’t think I’d get bored. I mean I know you won’t be with me all night, but I can fend for myself a bit, even in a room full of musicians. You don’t have to worry about it”

“How’d you know I was worrying about it?”

Kris rolled to face him and kissed him gently. “I can tell. Your eyes get all wibbly”

Adam chuckled. “Wibbly? What kind of word is that?”

Kris straddled him, gripping his hands for balance. “It’s my word. I really like your mom by the way, she’s cool”

“I’m glad, but can you do me a favour?”

“What?”

Adam quickly switched their positions so he was now on top (where he preferred). 

“Stop talking about my mom when you’re sitting on top of me. It’s kinda gross”

Kris rolled his eyes and gave a little buck of his hips, nudging his swelling erection against Adam’s groin, where he could feel an equal hardness. 

“Ok fine, you’ve got a point. Now shut up and kiss me”

***

“As you raise your arms, breathe in deeply before you assume the prayer position. Hold this position and slowly bring your right foot up so the flat of your foot is resting against the inside of your knee…”

Slowly Adam did as instructed, keeping his eyes closed and making sure to take deep cleansing breaths. As part of Kris’s plan to keep him mentally sane, he’d agreed to start taking yoga classes, and so far they seemed to be working. He enjoyed the slow, steady movements and the total relaxation he felt afterwards. It was great. 

Beside him Kris followed the movements but kept an eye on Adam, watching him as they moved into the Downward facing Dog position. He had no idea Adam was that flexible – his own muscles were a little tight as he moved, but that would improve with time. Never in all his life did he think he’d ever attend a yoga class, and especially not with his celebrity boyfriend. It was funny how life worked out he mused as he stared at the floor, listening to the tinkling music and soft voice of Jill their instructor as she talked them through another position. 

Hopefully taking these classes would mean Adam was a lot more relaxed in the coming weeks as he prepared for Grammy night. He’d seemed ok after the last few days, but Kris had noticed the fine lines of stress and fatigue around his eyes. Hollywood could be a difficult place to live, especially given Adam’s status, and the paparazzi were an ever-present annoyance. Most of them were fine, but occasionally a few stepped out of bounds. 

As for today though Adam had the rest of the day off – after three full days of publicity, David had decided to give him some space, and they planned to hit the shops. Adam still wasn’t sure what he was wearing for the Grammy’s, and he wanted to have a look today. (Kris wasn’t sure about his own attire either, but Adam’s outfit was far more important). 

Once the class finished they hit the showers before heading back outside. Adam had gone for understated cool with his clothes today, and hadn’t even put makeup on, (which Kris quite liked actually, it meant he could see all of Adam’s lovely freckles). Of course it could also be interpreted as Adam being more relaxed in general, but Kris didn’t want to read too far into things. 

“So where are we headed?” he asked as they stowed their gym clothes and yoga mats in the back of Adam’s BMW. 

“Well some of my favourite boutiques are on Melrose Avenue, so I say we start there” Adam said, taking his hand as they walked along the sidewalk. Even though it was winter the LA sun was bright and warm, and the sky clear. It was a beautiful day. 

Kris knew as soon as they stepped into the first shop that it was way out of his price range, but Adam went straight to the racks and started perusing the various designer clothes. Gucci, Dolce and Gabbana, Tom Ford, even Alexander McQueen – anything caught his fancy and Kris was sure that black Amex was getting a workout. Adam wasn’t ostentatious though, and the salesclerk seemed to be a genuine fan. 

“What about you huh?” Adam asked a few hours later, (his various bags had been stored safely away in the car and they’d moved on to another store). 

Kris shrugged. “I’m fine”

Adam narrowed his eyes but left it at that, dragging him into another store. This time he brought something back for Kris. 

“What do you think of this?” he asked, handing him the elegant suit. Kris’s eyes nearly popped out of his head when he noticed it didn’t have a price tag (surely an indication of it’s expense). The garment was gorgeous though, made of lightweight wool with a faint pinstripe and satin lined, the slate grey colour oozing class. It was Hugo Boss. 

“It’s nice” he said finally, already knowing where Adam was going with this. 

Sensing that Kris was uncomfortable, Adam stepped closer. “Would you wear it to the Grammy’s with me?”

“Adam I can’t afford this. I don’t even know the price, which is really kind of worrying me. Please, I’ll just wear something I already own”

“Don’t think about the cost – I can cover it, and if it makes you feel better you can pay me back, although you don’t have to. Kris you’d look fucking hot in this suit, and you need something like this for the Grammys. Please?”

Seeing that arguing would be useless Kris sighed and waved his hand. “Fine”

Adam grinned and kissed his forehead before handing the suit to the attendant. “Thank you baby. Now get in there and get measured”

It was almost four by the time they finally got home, and Kris never wanted to go shopping with Adam ever again. The man had a single mindedness that bordered on fucking crazy, and he was exhausted. Even though they’d shopped for hours, Adam still hadn’t decided on his own outfit, but had bought several items for himself anyway. Kris didn’t want to think about how much money Adam had dropped. 

“Hey Nemo” Kris said absently as the dog bounded up to them. Nemo seemed to have adjusted to his new life splendidly. 

“What’s that?” he asked, glancing at a large box sitting on the counter. It hadn’t been there when they’d left. 

“Oh David must have dropped off some mail” Adam said as he set down his bags on the dining table. He couldn’t wait to wear some of the new clothes he’d bought himself, especially those blue suede creepers he’d found. 

Kris poured him a glass of water as he sat down to go through the box, wondering if there was anything sinister in there. Suddenly the memory came rushing back, and he was reminded of what had happened the last time he’d opened a box like this. 

Chewing his lip he sifted through the various items there, finding three bills, a letter notifying him of an increase in council rates, a parcel of jewellery he’d ordered a month ago and a plain white letter simply addressed to ‘ADAM’. 

His breathing quickened. “Kris I don’t want to open that”

“Its ok” Kris said, taking the slip of paper from him and turning away so he could open it. Beside him Adam chewed on a fingernail as he saw Kris open it. 

“What does it say?” he asked after a moment, some sick part of himself still wanting to know despite the fact that it could only be one thing. Why was this always happening to him? How were those letters still finding him?

Kris looked stricken as he handed the letter to Adam – who paled considerably when he saw the two words scrawled heavily onto the paper.

YOU’RE DEAD

“Oh my God” Adam whispered, before he stumbled to his feet and raced from the room.


	26. 26

“Adam!” Kris called as he went slowly down the upstairs corridor. He hadn’t known if Adam wanted him to follow or if he wanted to be left alone, but he had to do something. He couldn’t look at that sick little letter anymore. 

“Adam where are you sweetheart?” he called again, pausing near the bedroom when he heard the sounds of vomiting coming from their ensuite. 

“Oh babe” he murmured softly when he caught sight of Adam kneeling over the toilet, heaving violently. 

“Here, you’re ok…shhh” he said softly as he knelt beside him, resting a hand on his lower back. 

“I can’t do this anymore…” Adam mumbled, his voice tight. Sitting up, he wiped at his cheeks and Kris was dismayed to see how badly he was trembling. His breathing was too fast for his liking as well, and Kris feared he was having another anxiety attack. 

“Come here” he said, bringing Adam closer so he could rest on his chest. This only seemed to intensify Adam’s tears though, and he sucked in a big breath – obviously trying to get himself under control. 

“Why…why won’t it…stop?” Adam asked, the words cut off by shuddering breaths. He squeezed his eyes closed and tried to focus on the steady thump of Kris’s heartbeat but all he could think of was that stupid letter. His ears were roaring and his hands and feet were tingling. In truth it felt like he was going crazy. 

“I don’t know, breathe Adam…nice and slow that’s it” Kris tried to keep his voice steady but god it was hard. _Don’t do this to yourself baby please._

“I feel like I’m going crazy” Adam admitted, his breathing slowing marginally. Kris kept his arms tight around him, deliberately taking deep slow breaths. Finally it seemed to work and Adam relaxed against him. 

“You’re not going crazy honey, shhh” Kris soothed, at a loss. He didn’t know what else they could do. Once they’d moved back here they had constant protection from two burly body- guards, who promised to let nothing happen to them. He’d started to think Adam had turned a small corner in his recovery, but now this had happened. 

Adam sighed wearily and nestled into the crook of Kris’s neck and shoulder, closing his eyes against it all. He felt like a puppet, his emotions battering him until he didn’t know which way was up. He’d been so happy this morning, had felt so good after their yoga class, but now he felt like crap again. How was he going to get through the next week until the Grammy’s?

“I think I better call David, he needs to know I got another one” he mumbled, pulling away from Kris’s comforting arms and standing slowly, his joints creaking a bit. It felt like he’d run a marathon, but in a way he was glad he hadn’t dissolved into true panic. Rolling his shoulders, he tried to dispel the remaining tension as they went back downstairs. 

The house was dark now, the evening shadows seeming to reflect the general mood. Kris felt out of sorts and worked up, but mostly he was worried about Adam. What else could be done to stop this sick stalker? He’d thought they were already doing everything, but apparently not because one letter had snuck through, sending Adam crashing back down the route of fear and pain. It wasn’t fair. 

“Yeah hi David. Hey listen I don’t really have the time to chat I just wanted to tell you I got another letter today. Yeah just now actually”

Adam sounded like he’d had just about enough of all this shit, which was proven when he slumped down into the lounge chair, running a hand through his hair as he continued talking to his manager. 

“Well I don’t know why they keep coming do I? Isn’t that something you should know? Aren’t you screening my fucking mail?”

Now Adam sounded angry, and Kris had to wonder if getting angry was better than depression. As he listened he grabbed two high- ball glasses and crossed to a decanter of amber liquid, pouring a small amount of whiskey for each of them. He didn’t normally indulge in hard liquor, but tonight he felt they both needed it. 

“Yes I know that, hey listen stop getting so worked up Dave. Me? I’m fucking allowed to get worked up over this, I’m the one who’s getting stalked. This sicko won’t leave me alone and you need to do something else because whatever the fuck you’re doing now isn’t working. It’s not David. I can’t be expected to attend all these parties if I’m freaking out every two seconds. What?”

Adam paused and sat up, his brow furrowed. “They want me to perform? Really?”

Now Kris was listening too, but it was a little hard to understand what exactly was going on when he only had one side of the conversation. So he sat and listened, slowly sipping his whiskey. As if sensing Adam’s distress Nemo curled up at their feet, resting his head on his paws. 

“Well you know I can’t say no. It’s the freaking Grammy’s! I’ve got to have someone there though, and I’m not sure I can do the red carpet. Honestly David I had another fucking panic attack when I saw that letter. I’m a mess. I can’t do it”

Reaching out, Kris gently squeezed Adam’s knee and offered him what he hoped was a reassuring smile. Adam made a face at the phone and took his hand instead, running his thumb over Kris’s skin repeatedly. 

“Ok yeah, you’ve got a point. Ok fine, yeah. Hey before you go, you really need to start screening my mail better. I mean it. Fine, but it needs to be better. Pick it up”

With those final words Adam ended his call, tossing the phone on the end table and slumping down into Kris’s embrace. Gone was the powerful businessman and celebrity, replaced instead with a normal man who was trying not to drown. 

“I am sick and tired of this shit. I honestly don’t know how he missed this one. I fucking pay him to screen the mail, he knows how to do his job and normally he does it well. Oh my god do you think I was too hard on him?” Adam asked, looking worriedly into Kris’s face. 

Kris chuckled and smoothed the worry lines from between Adam’s brows with his fingertip. “No, this is a majorly big deal and David needs to do his job better. You don’t pay him crickets to sit on his ass all day”

Adam sighed and settled back down. “They want me to perform at the show too. How cool is that? If I wasn’t scared out of my mind I’d be crazy with excitement”

Kris kissed his forehead. “It’s fantastic news baby, guess you’ll have to start planning your outfit for the performance too”

At that Adam’s eyes lit up. “I’ll have to go shopping again”

Kris rolled his eyes, horrified. “Fabulous”

Adam smiled and kissed him sweetly, a small glimmer of light in his eyes when he pulled back. Kris liked to think he’d taken some of Adam’s pain, at least for the moment anyway. 

“You don’t have to come with me this time, in fact I think I’ll be doing it online. Measurements are always easy to send over the web”

Kris grinned and sucked Adam’s earlobe into his mouth, teasing him. “And uh, how exactly would they measure your inseam? It’s…uh rather _long_ if I recall”

Adam chuckled throatily. “Well you would know wouldn’t you?”

Softly Kris ran a fingertip down Adam’s weary face. “You up for some lovin’?”

Adam sighed and rested his head in Kris’s neck again. “Yes. Take me upstairs and to bed. Right now. Make me forget everything that’s happened today”

“Gladly”


	27. 27

_“Well I was walking for some time…till I came across this sign…saying who are you and where are you from? We don’t like when visitors come…”_

The day before the Grammy ceremony Adam was rehearsing with his band for his performance, going through the motions and working out how he wanted things on the night. It had been a week since the nasty letter in the post, and so far David seemed to be doing his job properly. They hadn’t received any more letters, and for the most part Adam allowed himself to be excited for the show. 

Kris knew he wasn’t paying much attention to the media speculation and fuss about who would win what award – but apparently he’d firmed up as a favourite to take the award in his category. Kris thought it was great, and so did a great many people in the industry itself. Finally it seemed the right people were taking notice of Adam’s hard work and dedication to his craft. 

Despite all the fuss, Kris was still worried about how things would progress on the night. As promised David had provided security today, (there were two guards standing at the entrance, intimidating people), and they were promised these guards would also be in attendance tomorrow night. David had also convinced Adam to walk the red carpet (just for a little while), which Kris knew Adam was nervous about. He agreed though that it would be nice to talk to people and preen a little. 

Thankfully Adam had chosen his outfits for the night as well – a smart, elegant black Dolce and Gabbana suit for the red carpet, and bright blue suit for his performance. The Dolce suit had arrived in the mail from the designer boutique who simply demanded they had to be the ones to style the pop star. Adam was very flattered to be wearing their design. 

So all that remained was for him to perfect his performance, which he was still working on – two hours after they’d arrived. He looked every bit the professional up there, stopping every few moments to direct things a bit while the sound and lighting technicians worked on getting things right. He wasn’t at all diva-ish, but he had a clear idea of what he wanted. Kris thought he looked crazy hot up there. 

Technically Kris wasn’t really supposed to be in here anyway, but Adam had requested him be there for moral support. So far Kris was doing his best just to stay out of the way, stealing a chair and sipping his cappuccino while he watched. Nerves had already started fluttering in his stomach at the thought of attending such a ceremony. Never had he imagined he’d be going to the Grammy’s with the man very likely to win Best Male Pop artist. Surreal didn’t begin to cover it. 

He even had his name on a seat, (next to Adam of course). It was strange that his name may now be out in the media, but if it gave him a leg up in his career, then who knows where it might take him? He still hadn’t found a job here in LA, and definitely didn’t want to sponge off Adam forever. For his part Adam was more than happy to spend his money on Kris, just until he got himself settled a bit more. They’d been looking into new places to live, and Adam had found a new condo in the city with some very famous neighbours. Kris couldn’t wait to move in. 

“Ok yeah. I like that. Looks like we’re done. Yeah I’ll see you tomorrow then. I know can you believe it, man…” Adam’s voice brought him out of his thoughts and he turned to see him walking down the aisle with Tommy-Joe his guitarist. Kris liked the smaller androgynous man, he had a wicked sense of humour and played his instrument very well. He was glad he got along so well with Adam’s band mates, and friends. 

“Hey Tommy, you were great up there” Kris said, shaking his hand as he walked with them. Adam’s hand slid into his other and he pulled him closer. 

“You were great too” he whispered, kissing the shell of his ear. 

“Thanks. It’s gonna be pretty cool performing up there. Hope I don’t get stage fright” Adam said as they continued down toward the exit. People paid them no second glance as they went to the underground parking lot and lingered around their cars. Tommy-Joe stashed his Fender in the boot of his Audi and drummed his fingers on the door. 

“In all the years I’ve known and worked with you, you’ve never gotten stage fright before” 

Adam nodded. “Yeah. I’ve also never performed at the Grammy’s though”

“You’ll be fine bro. Hey listen I gotta run. I’ll see you tomorrow at five yeah?”

“Yep. Thanks man” Adam said, quickly hugging the smaller man before he let him go, watching as Tommy backed out of the car park and headed out. 

“Let’s go home rock star” Kris said, grinning at the flush that painted Adam’s cheeks at his words. 

Adam rolled his eyes and led the way back to the car – for once his mind filled with thoughts about the coming night, and nothing else. 

“You want me to drop you at home while I go to the salon? I might take a while” Adam pointed out as he made his way out of the complex and onto the roadway, heading into the city to his hair salon. To look his best he’d booked a cut and colour. 

“Yeah if you wouldn’t mind. I’m sure I can find something to keep myself amused while you’re getting pampered. I need to get a few things sorted out before tomorrow night as well”

Adam glanced over at him as he pulled off the main road and headed back up to the house, wondering what he was up to. 

“I’ll call you when I’m done” he said a moment later as he pulled up to the impressive house. Kris leant over to peck his cheek. 

“Love you. See you in a few”

“You too”

***

“So are you sure he got it?” Jeremy Styles asked, staring off into space as he spoke to his man. Having friends in the security business had proved to be very helpful in his pursuit of one particular Adam Lambert. With the help of his man Liam he’d managed to get a letter to his target, and man it had felt good to be back in the game. It was amazing really, what an unsavoury security guard could have access to. It had been easy for Liam to slip that letter into Adam’s mail, and very easy for him to add in a little something extra for the manager, who'd taken a little convincing to join the dark side. Jeremy prided himself on his persuasiveness.

For Jeremy though, it still wasn’t enough. He needed to be closer. He needed Adam to realise that if he didn’t behave as Jeremy wanted – then he’d be dead. It wasn’t enough anymore, he needed to teach Adam a lesson, especially after what had happened back at the house in Conway. Stupid motherfucker. 

“Yes, everything’s in place. Fine. Your cut will be handed over once the target has been delivered” 

With those callous words Jeremy ended his call and set the phone back on the desk, running his fingers lovingly over a sawn-off rifle he’d purchased three days earlier. It was long and slim, thin enough to slide down his pants leg, which was exactly what he intended to do with it under the guise of working security at the upcoming Grammy awards. Once again Liam had provided an excellent reference, and it had been easy for him to get the casual job. 

His uniform of standard-issue black trousers and crisp black shirt had already been pressed and now lay ready and waiting, hung over a tattered wire hanger. It was all ready, everything was in place, and Jeremy couldn’t wait. He couldn’t believe he was going to be so close to Adam again, and now that he’d felt the other man beneath him, he knew no one else deserved him. 

Adam was his and his alone, and if he couldn’t realise it, then he didn’t deserve to live.


	28. 28

“Oh god…oh yeah” 

“Fuck, ride it harder…”

Adam threw his head back, his hips snapping quickly as he thrust deep into his lover. Kris sat atop him, his legs wrapped around Adam’s waist, his body straining as he sought release. 

“Come on…” Adam grunted, angling his hips so he hit that special bump inside Kris, who’s eyes rolled as his head rolled forward to rest on Adam’s sweaty shoulder. It all felt so fucking good, his orgasm was close – coiled low in his belly as Adam thrust up into him. 

“Oh…I’m gonna…” he gasped as he felt the tell-tale beginnings, the tingling in his spine, the sweet clenching of just about every muscle in his body as his release spread through him. 

“Uh yeah..” Adam’s voice was strained and he gave two more sharp thrusts before he froze, his breath caught in his throat as his own orgasm washed over him. 

“Ohhhh” Adam breathed a moment later, burying his face in Kris’s shoulder. 

Still breathing heavily, Kris cupped Adam’s cheeks and brought their mouths together, licking at his kiss-swollen lips. His idea of early morning sex had been a pretty damn awesome one – and he had to admit it felt good seeing the nerves disappear from Adam’s gaze. 

“Still nervous now baby?” he murmured, gently trailing his lips along Adam’s cheekbone. 

Adam turned his head so their lips met again. “No”

Kris hummed and shifted slightly atop him, already feeling Adam’s cock harden again. Really the man’s stamina was out of this world, but he could keep up with him. His newfound flexibility thanks to their yoga classes was pretty fun too. 

“Can we spend the day doing this?” Adam wondered out loud as he began moving his hips again. 

Kris chuckled, his breath catching. “I don’t want to wear you out before your big show”

“What time do we have to be there again?” Adam asked, glancing over at the clock on the bedside table. It was just past 7am. 

“Not till five”

“Sounds perfect” he said, swiftly rolling over so Kris lay beneath him – more than ready for round two.

***

Hours later Kris couldn’t believe how hot Adam looked. His stylist Zoe had been called out to the house to help him get ready for the red carpet, and Kris couldn’t quite believe the transformation. Adam’s suit was black and perfectly tailored, with two panels of black shiny snake- skin running along the outside edge of the jacket. The black shirt he wore underneath was unbuttoned to mid-chest, exposing several long chains and necklaces that adorned his neck.

His face was an entirely different thing – and Kris wasn’t sure if he was allowed to touch him, let alone kiss him. Zoe had bounced on her feet the one time he’d been even close to kissing him. His foundation was perfectly applied and the kohl lining his eyes added a nice smoky touch. His hair was coiffed and styled, and he looked like a million bucks. (Of course Kris thought he looked amazing all the time, but tonight he looked especially smashing). It was his night after all. 

From across the room Adam’s eyes found his and he gave an excited grin. Zoe was just putting the finishing touches on his clothes before they were to leave. The limo had already been called. Kris himself was dressed to the nines in the suit Adam had bought him, and had worn a black shirt to match. Right now he was fiddling with a ring on his finger, (a ring that Adam had made him wear), and wondering what tonight would bring. Would he be going home with a Grammy winner? 

“Car’s here” he heard David say as he came around the corner. The manager was dressed in an elegant black tuxedo but looked plain next to the glittering rock star who gave himself one final appraising glance before he reached for Kris’s hand. 

“Ok, so everything’s already at the venue for the performance. You’ve seen the dressing room so you know where to go” David started rattling off details as he led the way down the front steps to the shiny black limo. Kris was a little disappointed that he’d be riding with them to the Staples Centre. He’d wanted to kiss Adam in the back of the car with no-one watching. 

Just before they got in Adam turned to David, giving him a serious look. Despite the glam he looked a little pale and Kris knew he was terrified. 

“I’m ok Dave. We’ve gone over this a million times. It’s all sorted. Let’s go”

Once they were in the car and on the way, Adam reached for Kris’s hand again, squeezing his fingers as they drove through the city. Despite the fact that he’d been told by Zoe not to mess up her careful work, he leant over and pressed his lips to Adam’s, trying to instil some confidence. 

Adam melted against him. “I love you”

“I love you too. It’s gonna be so much fun tonight, you won’t even have time to be nervous. I’ll be right next to you the whole time”

Adam smiled and kissed him again, heedless of the other man in the car with them. If David was uncomfortable with their display of affection then he didn’t say anything, preferring to busy himself with his iphone, making sure everything was organised. Adam’s security team were following in the sedan behind them and they’d been given strict instructions to guard the star. 

Traffic thickened once they got closer to the venue but they made their way to the front of the centre where Hollywood’s rich and famous mingled and were photographed as they made their way inside. Adam’s carefully constructed public façade went up as he exited the car first, his heart thundering in his ears as the camera’s flashed and the awaiting media flung questions at him. His two bodyguards stood back as he posed for a few solo shots before he reached back and took Kris’s hand. 

“Adam? Who’s this?”

“Who’s your friend Adam?”

“Who are you wearing tonight Adam?”

The questions came thick and fast as they made their way onto the red carpet, Kris was momentarily blinded but Adam’s hand was a warm soothing presence on his back as he guided him along. 

“What do you think your chances are tonight Adam?”

“Were you in hiding recently? Rehab? A holiday?”

For his part Adam didn’t answer any questions, he just posed and smiled for the cameras, his face portraying no sign of his inward terror. He kept Kris close, gripping his hand tightly as they made their way to the bank of reporters who’d been given the chance to interview the stars. 

_Holy shit. I’m at the Grammy’s, watching Adam be interviewed and photographed and …oh my God is that Gaga?_ Kris’s mind was in overdrive as he waited patiently off to the side as Adam was interviewed by a few media personalities. He spotted Ryan Seacrest among the crowd, as well as Beyonce, Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Rihanna and about a million other people he never even imagined he’d be close to. 

Finally they were allowed to go inside, and Adam reached for his hand again as an usher led them to their seats. The whole place was abuzz with people and random cameras went off as they sat down, left alone briefly. Out of the corner of his eye Kris saw Adam loose a big breath, his mask crumbling for a moment to reveal the tormented man beneath. 

“Hey, you did it” he reminded him softly, keeping his voice low in lieu of being overheard by a nosy reporter. The two bodyguards were stationed in the row behind them and were quietly scanning the increasing crowd. Kris didn’t care if people thought they were overkill – all he cared about was having Adam in once piece. 

Adam nodded and stared off over the vast interior of the building, sparing a wave for one of his friends. Kris felt slightly out of place among the glittering music royalty, but he was glad to have Adam there. Adam’s song wasn’t until halfway through the show, so they had a little time to watch the first few awards being handed out before he had to disappear backstage. 

Once everyone was seated the lights went down and the show began, Beyonce wowing the crowd with her latest single and generally putting on a fabulous show as she sashayed across the stage. Kris was amazed and still couldn’t believe he was sitting here. From that song the show moved seamlessly onto the first awards, and Kris watched and clapped as he recognised the stars heading up to the stage to collect their statuette. 

Finally it came to Adam’s category, and he felt Adam sit up a little straighter as their blurbs were played. Briefly the camera swung to them as Adam’s name was read and he squeezed Adam’s fingers as they waited. 

“And the Grammy goes to…Adam Lambert”

The room erupted into applause, but Adam seemed to have frozen. He had the most endearing look of shock on his face that Kris had to squeeze his leg to get his attention. 

“Are you going up?” he asked. 

Adam blinked and seemed to snap out of his shock, squeezing his leg briefly. 

“Yeah” he muttered absently as he rose to his feet, adjusting his Dolce suit as he made his way down the aisle, accepting the hugs that came his way. 

In his seat Kris whistled loudly as he watched Adam get up onto the stage, his heart full to bursting as he watched the man he loved give his acceptance speech. They’d argued over that speech – Adam hadn’t wanted to write one in case he didn’t win, but Kris always thought it prudent to be prepared. He’d have to give him shit about it when they got home. 

He didn’t even remember much of Adam’s speech however, because his moment of joy was cut short when a hooded figure stepped from the wings of the stage, what looked to be a sawn-off rifle raised and pointed at Adam. 

“Oh my God. No…no!” Kris’s voice rose as he watched the man take aim, the pop of the weapon loud in the deathly quiet room. 

“NOO!” he screamed as he watched Adam tumble to the ground, the gold Grammy making a loud clunk as it hit the stage. The room erupted once again but this time into screams and shouts as security descended onto the stage, obscuring Adam from view. 

Reacting quickly Kris leapt to his feet and bolted down the aisle, not caring who he pushed out of his way. He had to get to Adam, he had to make sure he was alright. 

_Oh God please be ok baby, please be ok…_

“I’m sorry Sir you can’t get up there” one burly guard said, pushing him back. 

Kris pushed against him futilely. “He’s my boyfriend, please I have to see him!”

“He’s fine! He’s clear, let him up” From the melee he could make out David’s voice and he pushed his way through the crowd until he could see Adam. 

“Oh baby” he cried as he dropped to his feet beside Adam, who lay in an ever-increasing pool of his own blood. 

“Kris?” Adam choked out, his voice faint. He looked vaguely surprised, like he didn’t really understand what had happened to him. 

“I’m here baby, shhh, just lie still now” Kris said, horrified at the small wound in Adam’s chest that was oozing blood at an alarming rate. Beside him David was rattling off instructions on the phone, presumably to an ambulance operator. 

“Hurts…” Adam whimpered, before he fell into a harsh coughing fit, blood bubbling from between his lips. 

Tears blurred Kris’s vision as he gently brushed Adam’s hair back, his throat tight as he whispered meaningless words of comfort. This was bad: this was very fucking bad. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. They were supposed to grow old together. 

Around them, the gathered celebrities and various security personnel stepped back, giving the two men some privacy. The Grammy’s were supposed to be a night of celebration, where the hardworking musicians were awarded and praised for their music. Adam Lambert had long been a fixture at various parties and award shows and he’d long ago earned the respect of his peers. He was well liked for his friendliness and his hard work, his music speaking of gay rights and the love he aimed to share with the world. 

It wasn’t fair that he’d been targeted like this, and everyone there was floored that this had even happened, each of them wiping away tears of their own as they watched Adam’s partner weep over him, the young man crying quietly as he held his love’s hand, comforting him while they waited for the ambulance. 

Everyone in the room was so focussed on sending love and light to the young star that they paid no attention to the scrawny blonde man who slipped quietly away, his firearm tucked carefully into his clothes, Adam’s blood on his hands.


	29. 29

Cedars Sinai hospital was where the celebrities were known to seek medical aid – anything from an overdose to having a baby delivered, but Kris still hated the place. It wasn’t anything personal, he just hated hospitals altogether. It was the smell, that overly clean disinfectant that made his eyes water and clung to the inside of his nose. It wasn’t pleasant to say the least – just like a lot of what happened in this very building. 

Sighing softly he ran a hand through his hair, dislodging the last of the product left. He’d been waiting here for the last two hours while the surgeons worked on Adam, doing nothing but worry and fret. He couldn’t even focus on the golden Grammy award clutched in his hands – a useless trophy of a night he was pretty sure he would rather forget. He still couldn’t believe it had actually happened – someone had shot Adam. It was the stuff of nightmares. 

“Kris? What’s going on? What’s happening?” 

He glanced up, shrugging helplessly as Leila descended on him, wrapping her arms tightly around his shoulders. Dazed, he patted her back. 

“I don’t know…he’s in surgery…” he mumbled, feeling tears sting his eyes. 

“Oh sweetie it’s going to be ok. He’ll be fine, he’s a strong one, shhh” Leila whispered as she felt the young man tremble. Gently she dabbed at Kris’s cheeks and took in his shell-shocked expression. He looked pale and unwell, dark shadows circling his eyes. A golden Grammy was clutched in his hands, hands that were stained with her son’s blood. 

“What happened?” she asked gently, handing him a small bottle of hand sanitiser. Setting aside the trophy, Kris cleaned his hands, trying to get himself under control. 

“Someone shot him. He was up there making his speech and looking fucking amazing, and then some guy walked out from the side of the stage and shot him. It all happened so fast” he said, thinking back to the chaos that had followed. 

Wordlessly Leila slipped her arm around him again, giving him a squeeze. She didn’t know what to say, so for the moment she chose to say nothing, instead focussing on sending positive energy to her son, and lending support to his boyfriend. Down the hall she could see David talking brusquely on his phone, head kept low as he obviously tried to make amends for what had happened. There was also a small team of police officers as well as numerous officials who were very busy determining exactly what had happened. 

For the moment it appeared they’d been left alone, and frankly that was fine with her because a steely resolve was building inside her. She knew David had managed Adam’s career for a few years now, and despite the fact that he was a decent man, she didn’t feel he was doing his job properly. But now wasn’t the time to be worrying about David, now she needed all her strength to focus on Adam, who may or may not come out of the surgery. 

“How long have you been here honey?” she asked, rubbing Kris’s shoulder. 

He shrugged. “A couple hours I guess. They said the bullet went real close to his heart, and he’d lost a lot of blood. I can’t leave, I have to see him first”

“I know. It’s going to be ok Kris. We just have to wait. He’s going to be ok”

***

It was another two hours before Adam’s surgery finished, and by that time Kris had bitten every fingernail down to the quick. The surgeon looked exhausted as he came to meet them, his eyes widening in surprise as he took in the activity in the hallway. David finished his phone call and came to stand with the small group, wanting to hear what the surgeon had to say. 

“How is he?” Leila asked, holding Kris’s hand tightly. 

The surgeon sighed wearily. “He’s out of theatre now, but his condition is still critical. The bullet lodged close to his aorta and he’s lost a significant amount of blood. We’ve stopped the bleeding but the next 48 hours will be critical. He’s not out of the woods just yet”

“Can we see him?” Kris asked, his heart falling to his feet upon hearing the grave words and the seriousness of Adam’s condition. Following his sense of dread was a simmering anger that ran like a current under his skin – whoever had done this was going to pay. 

“Yes but only momentarily, and only one at a time. This way” he said, leading them down the corridor and through a set of doors that led to the intensive care unit of the hospital. 

“You first Leila” Kris muttered, pushing the older woman ahead before he could stop himself. Even though he loved Adam desperately, his mother deserved to see him first. 

The surgeon waited with him while Leila went into the room, turning to him for a moment. 

“Please don’t be alarmed by the machines in there, while he’s on a ventilator at the moment it’s only temporary – just to give his body time to recover. He’s also in a medically induced coma. Provided all things run smoothly, we expect to bring him back in a couple of days”

Kris nodded, wondering why he felt the need to thank this man when all he’d given them was awful news. He knew he should be more grateful to the man who’d likely saved Adam’s life, but at the moment his mind was occupied. 

After a few moments Leila came back out, wiping her eyes and crossing to talk to the surgeon for a moment, leaving Kris to enter the room. Slowly he pushed open the door and stepped inside, holding his breath when he saw Adam lying in the bed – looking small and pale against the crisp white sheets. 

He chewed his lip as he sat hesitantly in the chair beside the bed, a chair he knew he’d become intimately acquainted with during Adam’s stay here. Carefully he brushed the back of Adam’s cool hand, mindful of the IV line in his elbow. There was an oxygen tube in place in his mouth, which drew his lips away in an exaggerated grimace, and thick white bandages swathed around his middle. His ebony hair was a shock of colour against the sheets, and his freckles stood out in obvious relief, his lashes brushing his cheeks as he rested in the deep, dreamless haze of medical sleep. It was bizarre seeing him like this – even though Kris had slept beside him for months now, Adam had always been full of life. Now he seemed worn, his essence whispering away. 

“Please come back to me” Kris whispered, leaning forward to press a kiss to Adam’s forehead. Gently he smoothed his hair back before pulling himself away, closing the door quietly behind him. 

Leila handed him a tissue from her pocket while she continued to talk to the surgeon, and Kris absently wiped his eyes, unaware that he’d even been crying. His grief ran deep, like a clear ocean, and like a rock in that ocean he felt it break around him, his emotions cresting like a tide. Adam would be ok: he had to be ok. 

“I know you must be desperate for answers, but I’m afraid all we can do now is wait for his condition to improve. He’s got the best of care here, and while I know it must be difficult might I suggest you both go home to recover a bit? We have both your numbers and we’ll call if anything happens. It’s best to look after yourselves”

Leila nodded wearily, even though she wanted nothing more than to stay with her son. Her heart was still beating painfully in her chest, the image of Adam in that hospital bed etched onto her mind. Beside her Kris continued to dab his eyes, but she could tell he was numb – the same creeping sensation that was stealing through her. 

“Let’s go home Kris” she murmured quietly, taking his arm as they went back down the corridor. 

“Wait” David called, jogging to catch up with them. 

“I just wanted to let you know that Adam’s house is secure – I’ve had a team go over it for any trace of anything suspicious. The two bodyguards I hired will be stationed here, but another two have been commissioned for the both of you. I hope that’s ok”

“Its fine. Can we go now?” Kris said wearily. All he wanted to do right now was curl up in their big bed and lie with Adam’s scent all around him. 

“Of course. I’ll talk to you later on today” 

“Come on” Leila said, leading him out to where a town care was waiting to drive them back home. They hadn’t spoken much, but it was silently agreed upon that they’d go to Adam’s house – each of them too uneasy to be apart. 

Once Kris got home he made sure Leila was settled in one of the guest bedrooms before he stumbled up the stairs to his own, falling gracelessly onto the large bed, his face pressed against Adam’s pillow. 

Only there could he allow his tears to finally flow free.

***

Kris slept fitfully that night, his dreams filled with images of that sickening moment when Adam had flopped to the stage, the look of pained shock that was written onto his love’s features as he lay upon the stage where just moments before he’d accepted one of the biggest awards of his career. He couldn’t get it out of his head, and he woke just as the sun was creeping over the horizon, holding Adam’s pillow close for a moment before he climbed out of the bed. 

The house was quiet and still as he made his way downstairs to the kitchen, pausing for a moment to watch the sun’s rays illuminate the garden and decking. He hoped that same light was having the same life-affirming effect on Adam, who’d still be out to the world, locked away in sleep. His phone had been silent for the remainder of the night, which he could only think was a good thing. 

Sighing softly he slipped another filter cup in the coffee machine and stared into space as it brewed, absently plucking two mugs from the cabinet before he was aware of what he was doing. Biting his lip he left the second coffee mug for Leila (at least one Lambert would be drinking from it this morning), and went to sit at the table, which was still a little messy from the day before. 

There he sat unmoving until an hour later when Leila came down, rubbing her eyes tiredly. Like Kris she hadn’t slept well either. 

“How long have you been up hon?” she asked softly, pouring herself a coffee. 

Kris shrugged and ran a fingertip around the rim of his mug. “A couple hours I guess. I couldn’t sleep”

“I know how you feel” Leila said, and for once the sentiment rang true. 

“My phone didn’t go off, so I guess that’s good” Kris said a moment later, trying to fill the empty space with words. They fell flat – just like his heart. 

“It is. I’m gonna go grab a shower and then we can get back into the hospital. I can’t sit around here all day waiting for news” 

Kris nodded and watched her head off to the guest bathroom before he washed out his mug and went to his own shower, attempting to put himself back together so he could face the day. He needed to be strong for Adam right now. 

Despite the early hour, the hospital staff paid them no attention as they made their way back to Adam’s room in the intensive care unit. The ride in had been uneventful – save for the sudden group of people gathered at the entrance. It took Kris a moment to realise they were fans holding some kind of vigil for their idol. They had poster boards and flowers and various other things set up in a semi-circle near the front doors and upon spotting Kris and Leila, they came forward. 

One particular girl who had black ringlets looked especially tearful as she handed Kris a beautiful bunch of white lilies. 

“For Adam. We’re all really sorry this happened and really worried” 

“Thank you” Kris said, managing a smile before the bodyguard he hadn’t realised he had, came forward to escort them into the building. 

_Guess news travels fast_ he mused as he rode the elevator up, listening to Leila talk quietly on the phone for a moment. 

“Adam’s father Eber is coming down on the next flight. So is Neil his brother. You haven’t met them yet” she said, slipping the phone back into her bag as they rounded the corner. 

Kris nodded. “I’m looking forward to meeting them, although I wish it were under better circumstances”

Leila chuckled wryly. “Oh believe me honey, so do I”

The intensive care unit was bustling despite the early hour, but Kris and Leila were able to take a seat beside Adam’s bed and spend a few quiet moments with him before the doctor came around, 

“It’s looking good, his condition is stabilising.”

“Thank God” Leila said, gently brushing Adam’s forehead. It was strange seeing him so still and Kris gently stroked the back of his hand. 

“Are we allowed to be here for a while?” he asked. 

“Of course. If his condition is stable enough we’ll reduce the sedation and move him to a private ward. It’ll be more comfortable there, for you all”

“Thank you Doctor” Kris said, finally voicing his gratitude. He hadn’t had the chance the night before – too caught up with everything that had happened. 

“It’s not a problem. I can be reached any time during the day if you have any concerns. Apart from that I’ll leave you to it”

With those parting words he slipped Adam’s chart back onto the foot of the bed and stepped from the room, pulling the privacy curtain around them so they were alone. 

“What time do Eber and Neil get in?” Kris asked after a while, his eyes trained on Adam’s pale cheeks. 

Leila glanced at her watch. “In a couple of hours. I guess all we can do until then is wait”

Kris smiled wanly. “Seems so”


	30. 30

Two days after he was admitted to hospital, the doctors brought Adam off the ventilator and out of the medical sleep. They were satisfied that his condition had stabilised enough for him to recover in a private room, and so he was moved into a very nice (for a hospital room anyway) spacious room with a nice view of the back courtyard. Kris felt much better when Adam breathed on his own, saw his eyes moving in REM sleep – it meant he was back with them, even though he wasn’t quite awake yet. 

Despite the circumstances, he got along famously with Adam’s father Eber – a broad shouldered, sandy haired man who had a keen eye and was really very much like his elder son. Neil was a hoot too, and Kris could see they’d get into some major political discussions if given the chance. They welcomed him warmly into their family, each of them pleased at how close they were. 

Even with the Lambert’s all-encompassing warmth, Kris sill longed for the moment when Adam would wake up. He spent countless hours at his bedside, holding his hand and speaking quietly to him. The doctors had said that Adam would wake at any time, and that sleep was good for his recovery, but Kris wouldn’t rest easy until he saw those baby blues again.

Thankfully Adam woke up late one afternoon while Kris was sitting quietly with him. Leila had just stepped out to get coffee for everyone, and Eber and Neil had gone to stretch their legs in the corridors. Kris was absently tracing Adam’s Eye of Horus tattoo when his hand twitched and he gave a low moan. 

“Baby? Can you hear me?” Kris immediately whispered, turning Adam’s hand over so he could hold it firmly. 

Adam’s eyes fluttered briefly before he opened them, squinting. “Kris?”

Tears blurred Kris’s vision as he gently swept Adam’s hair off his forehead. “I’m here”

“Everything’s fuzzy…”

“I know, you’ve been asleep for a long time. Just close your eyes love: we’re all here. You’re safe here” 

Adam hummed softly and closed his eyes again, settling back onto the pillow. Gently Kris dropped a kiss to his cheek, a strange sensation washing through him. Now that Adam was awake he felt an almost crushing sense of failure. He should have been able to protect him – he should have known something like this would have happened. Hadn’t they dealt with the stalker for long enough to be able to sense his actions?

Once he was sure Adam was asleep again he stepped from the room, almost running into Leila. 

“He woke up. Just for a second, but I talked to him. He’s going to be ok” he breathed, relief almost making him weak-kneed. 

“Oh thank God” Leila dashed her eyes and hugged him awkwardly, still holding a tray of coffee cups. 

“Don’t you feel weird about this though?” Kris asked, once she’d composed herself. 

“What do you mean?”

Kris shrugged. “I don’t know. I just feel like I should have been able to protect him, even though he had bodyguards to do that. Where were they when he was up on that stage? I mean I know they’re here now, but isn’t it too little too late?”

Leila didn’t know what to say to that. Kris had a point. 

“I think something stinks here. David sent him down to Conway in the middle of fucking nowhere, alone while this sicko has been stalking him? It’s too weird, and I think Adam is too trusting. He kept telling me David had things under control, but I just don’t see it. I don’t think he did his job properly”

“David told me they sent him to Conway for his protection, alone because he made a smaller target. There’s nothing more obvious to paparazzi then a celebrity getting escorted onto a plane by a team of burly bodyguards. I’ll admit I didn’t like it when he said Adam would be down there alone, but I trusted him too. He’s been a good manager for Adam these last few years” Leila said, sipping her coffee. She followed Kris to a bench and sat beside him. 

Kris ran a hand through his hair and stared at the two bodyguards stationed outside Adam’s room. So far they hadn’t said much – but then he supposed they hadn’t been hired to talk. With the stalker apparently on the loose again, he felt a little better knowing they were there, but then again still uneasy. 

“I just want him to be safe” he said softly after a while. He couldn’t help but feel that Adam needed to totally overhaul his managerial team, but he didn’t know how to go about setting that into motion. 

“He will be, he is”

Kris shook his head. “No he’s not. We can all kid ourselves into thinking that, but at the end of the day he still got shot despite his so-called bodyguards, he still got traumatised and had to hide away. It’s not fair, and I think David did a pretty shitty job to be honest”

“What should he have done then?”

“Set him up with a bodyguard, screw the paparazzi. He should have made sure that those letters didn’t get past the door of his house”

Leila nodded, understanding Kris’s point of view. She was pleased he was so invested in Adam’s safety – it was nice that he’d found a partner who cared for him, instead of his celebrity. She knew he’d struggled for a number of years, and was glad he now had the mutual respect he deserved. 

“I think David was only doing what he thought was best. I’m sure he didn’t mean for any of this to happen”

_It still did though, didn’t it?_ Kris thought as he sat there sipping his coffee. He’d met David only once, and while he thought he was an ok guy – he still felt uneasy about the way he’d managed Adam’s security. 

He just didn’t know what to do about it.

***

“Which room is Adam Lambert in? I’ve been called in to consult on his care. I’m a trauma expert” Jeremy Styles said, pleased his voice didn’t waver. He adjusted the black -rimmed glasses on his thin nose and rested his hands on the desk.

“Who was the consulting surgeon on the case?” the receptionist asked seriously. 

“Dr Reynolds. We worked together at Johns Hopkins before he came out here” Jeremy said easily, relying on the information one of Adam’s so-called bodyguards had told him. 

“Can I see some ID?”

Jeremy smiled and produced the forged identification badge bearing a made up name and false credentials that would allow him access to Adam. The receptionist stared at the badge for a moment before it passed the test and she handed it back. 

“Of course. He’s in room 234”

Jeremy nodded and headed off down to the elevators, trying to look confident. He didn’t really know where he was going, but he assumed room 234 was on the second level. Thankfully no-one stopped him as he made his way through the hospital, his disguise of doctor’s garb must have been very convincing. 

Once he’d learned that his bullet had failed he’d known he had to come to the hospital to finish Adam once and for all. It wouldn’t be hard this time, after all Adam would be weakened from the blood loss and trauma – he wouldn’t put up much of a fight. 

Maybe he could draw this out for a while.

***

The next time Adam woke, his family were there and Kris took a moment to step outside. He desperately wanted to be in there, but he knew he’d get Adam later. Right now his family needed to be with him. Besides, there was someone else he needed to talk to.

Once news that Adam was awake had broken David had come by the hospital to see him, and was now lingering in the hallway talking on his phone again. The two bodyguards were stationed outside Adam’s room, silent and stoic. Kris felt very short standing near them. 

“Can I have a word?” he asked David, once the other man had finished his call. 

“Sure, it’s Kris right?”

Kris nodded tightly as they stepped away from Adam’s room. 

“Yep. I just want to voice something that’s been on my mind lately. Do you think you’ve done a good job protecting Adam?”

David frowned. “Yeah. I mean it was pretty difficult to get him away from it all, but I managed it ok”

“But he didn’t get away from it all, do you know what I’m saying? Even while he was in Conway he was still targeted”

“Hey look I know you’re invested in Adam personally, but none of this is my fault”

Kris raised his hands, placating. “I know, and I’m not blaming you for any of it, but it still has to be said that Adam went through some pretty traumatising events recently least of all the shooting. I think you’ve made some mistakes that quite frankly are unforgivable. What if Adam had died down in Conway when that sicko broke into the house? What if he’d died now?”

“Well I think Adam thinks that I do a pretty good job at managing his career…”

“Yes, his career. How bout his life?”

“Adam didn’t hire me to manage his life. He’s apparently got you for that now” David sniped. 

Kris rolled his eyes. “I don’t manage his life, it’s just that I intend to spend the rest of mine with him, and I don’t want anything else happening to him. What kind of security have you got set up, because frankly it’s been pretty lax lately”

“His house is secure, and there’s a team of guys watching his back. I’ve hired the best security team money will buy. This isn’t really any of your business actually”

“Where were those guys the night of the Grammies?”

“Kris this isn’t like the Bodyguard film, I can’t have people watching him constantly how do you think that would make him feel?”

Kris sighed, feeling his frustration mount. While it was true that he didn’t blame David for anything that had happened, he just wanted the other man to see his point. 

David moved to the doorway. “Look I’ve got a busy day today. I understand your concern but this isn’t my fault – you need to back off”

Kris waved his hand in the air as David stepped from the room. Well that had been useless, all he’d succeeded in doing was making things uncomfortable between them. Awesome. Growling in frustration he stomped from the room and almost knocked over a passing doctor. 

“Sorry man” he said, paying no attention as the blonde man walked away down the hall. Half expecting the guards to turn him away, he brushed past them and into Adam’s room, where a nurse was taking his blood pressure. 

“Are you feeling alright? You’re very quiet” she asked as she made a few notes in his chart. 

Adam nodded. “Yeah I’m just tired”

“Might be time for you to get some rest” she prompted gently, patting his arm before sliding the chart away and leaving them, her footsteps quiet. 

“Time for a sleep?” Kris asked, sitting down near Adam’s elbow. For the moment they were alone, the others must have gone for a walk, and right now Kris was grateful – he needed some time alone with Adam. 

“Think so” Adam said, his eyes already drifting shut. Kris snuggled down beside him, pressing his lips to his temple. 

“Stay with me”

“I will, close your eyes” Kris whispered, running his fingers through Adam’s hair. Adam hummed appreciatively and closed his eyes, his breathing evening out until he was asleep, his hand curled around Kris’s.

***

Outside Adam’s room, Eber peered in on the sleeping couple, a gentle smile on his face.

“Let’s leave them to it” he said, sliding his arm around Leila’s side as they headed back down the corridor. Despite the fact that they were divorced they still had a remarkably amicable relationship, and it really helped in moments of crises. Neil lumbered along behind them, lost in his own thoughts. 

None of them paid attention to a scrawny blonde doctor who was loitering near a drinking fountain. His white coat and black rimmed glasses gave him the appearance of being a member of staff – but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. 

Once the Lamberts were out of sight, Jeremy wandered up to the window of Adam’s room, gritting his teeth in frustration when he saw Kris curled up in the same bed. Why must he continue to make things difficult for him? It wasn’t fair – all Jeremy wanted to do was be alone with Adam, but there was always someone in his way. Well not anymore. 

Sliding his glasses farther up the bridge of his nose, he marched into the room, grabbing the clipboard and none-too-gently shaking Kris’s arm. 

“Excuse me Sir? I’m about to remove Mr Lambert’s catheter. I don’t feel comfortable with you here – please wait outside” he said, once the other man’s eyes had fluttered open. 

“Uh, sure” Kris said, a little puzzled but understanding completely. 

“He must be doing ok then, if you’re going to remove that” he noted, standing up and re-arranging his rumpled clothes. 

Jeremy nodded, his muscles bunching in annoyance. Why couldn’t this prick just fuck off? 

“Not necessarily. We discovered a kink in the line earlier and I’m just going to change it over” he lied, scribbling onto the bottom of Adam’s chart. It was full of glorious information like his exact height, weight and medical records. Juicy stuff. 

“Ok, not a problem. I’ll just be outside” Kris said, scratching the back of his neck as he ambled outside. 

Finally Jeremy thought as he slid the chart back in its place. Adam slept peacefully on, his face free of worry or stress and he looked exquisite against those white sheets. After checking the hallway Jeremy flipped the lock on the door and turned back to his prize, some small part of him unable to believe he’d gotten this far. Even David didn’t know he was in here – he assumed the pot-shot at the Grammies had been enough for him, and the 2 million in his pocket meant that his part of the whole ordeal was over. He hadn’t counted on Jeremy wanting more. 

_Alone at last._


	31. 31

Despite the many sedatives running through his system, and the sharp ache deep in his chest Adam woke as soon as Kris left the bed. The heart monitor he was hooked up too beeped annoyingly and he wondered how he even drifted off in the first place. Sighing softly he kept his eyes closed and tried to go back to sleep – but something felt off. 

“I know you’re awake Adam. You breathe differently” Jeremy’s voice was quiet. 

Adam’s eyes snapped open and he cast about for the voice, his eyes settling on a blonde man who stood way too close to his bed. 

“Who the fuck are you?” he blurted, certain he’d never seen this particular doctor before. He wasn’t assigned to his case he was sure. 

“You know who I am” Jeremy said, his head tilted to the side as he scrutinised the other man. 

Adam frowned, his chest aching painfully as his breathing sped up. There was something eerily familiar about the blonde man, his eyes were cold and dark – unreflective pools like a sharks eye. He almost looked like…

“Oh my God! Get the fuck away from me” Adam’s voice shook as he scrambled for the nurses call button, pressing a hand to his chest when pain speared through him. 

Jeremy stepped closer, easily tossing the button away and pressing closer even while Adam continued to shrink away – well as much as he was able in his weakened state. The pathetic whimpers falling from his lips as he tried to scramble away made goose-bumps of pleasure break out on Jeremy’s arms. 

“Oh no no Adam, come on now. Please don’t cry” he whispered, sliding his hand around Adam’s wrist. Predictably Adam struggled, but it was easy to overpower him. 

“Please let me go” Adam sobbed, turning his eyes to the window in a desperate hope that Kris could see what was going on. 

“No, he can’t help you. It’s just us in here” 

“What do you want?” Adam managed, his chest burning. 

“I want you. It’s simple really, although you’ve made it everything but. Why do you have to make things hard for us Adam?”

Adam’s eyes widened in terror. “Us? There is no fucking us! Get off me, Somebody help!

Jeremy laughed and reached up to caress Adam’s cheek. “No-one’s going to come for you Adam. I’ve got you in here for as long as I want. You know it’s remarkably easy to get past security, well especially if you pay them off”

“What? You paid my bodyguard?”

“I did. You can thank him for that letter a few weeks ago. He made sure it was in that box, even after your stupid manager got scared and wanted to screen it. That was a pain in the ass let me tell you. I paid him off though, so he’s totally fine with all this”

“You were at the house?” Adam whispered, the white edges of pain creeping into his field of vision. His chest burned with every breath and he couldn’t struggle away. David was in on this? He couldn’t make sense of it all. 

“I was, and at your house in Conway, although why you chose to go there is beyond me. I love you Adam, so much it’s painful for me to imagine you with anyone else. I can’t imagine it actually, and I’ve come to a decision today that’s going to make me very upset”

“What?”

Jeremy leaned closer and pressed an open-mouthed kiss to Adam’s closed lips, forcing his way into his mouth with a tongue that tasted of stale coffee and beer. Bile rushed up Adam’s throat and he bucked away, screaming out in agony as his chest protested. 

“It’s you Adam. You’re the problem. You can’t seem to appreciate the things I do for you. The letters, the gifts, even the visit to your home. It was all for you, all so we could be together. I love you Adam”

Adam tried to wriggle away again at those words, tears streaming down his cheeks. God why couldn’t someone hear him? Surely a nurse was going to come by soon to take his vitals or subject him to more tests or x-rays or some medical thing. 

“Shhh, you need to be quiet now. Just shut your pretty little mouth and it won’t hurt as much. Do you want to know what I’ve decided to do?”

“Please…” he whispered brokenly. 

“I’ve decided to end your life Adam. You’re no use to me if you don’t appreciate anything I do for you. Sure your family might miss you for a few months, your fans will surely feel your absence, but it’s the only decision I can come to that makes me happy, and I have to think of myself in this Adam. I can’t suspend my feelings anymore. This needs to be done”

“No!” Adam yelled, almost blacking out in agony as the bullet wound protested. Jeremy reached for a pillow and pressed one final kiss to Adam’s forehead before he smashed it over his face, ignoring Adam’s screams of protest, his flailing hands, jerking knees. 

“Just be quiet now, it’ll all be over soon” Jeremy snarled, holding the pillow down harder as Adam’s limbs stopped moving and he lay blessedly still. 

“There, that wasn’t so bad was it?” he said as he removed the pillow, gazing down onto Adam’s unmoving face, his eyes wide and his mouth a horrible grimace. 

So caught up was he in his triumph at finally having defeated Adam fucking Lambert, that Jeremy didn’t hear the door open or the soft intake of breath as Kris Allen realised what he’d done. 

“What the actual FUCK is going on here?”

***

Kris couldn’t believe his eyes as he took in the sight before him. A blonde man was kneeling over Adam – who lay at an odd angle, his eyes wide and glassy. It didn’t look like he was breathing, and white hot rage rushed up Kris’s spine, a scream of rage echoing around the small room as he launched himself at the other man, knocking him off the bed and to the floor.

“You motherfucking asshole!” he growled, heedless of the medical equipment that went flying as he wrestled the other man into submission, drawing back his fist to deliver a mean punch that knocked the other man out cold. 

Breathing heavily he whipped off his belt and wound it quickly around the other man’s wrists before he looped the end through a rung on Adam’s bed, aware that he had to get Adam breathing again. He couldn’t afford to waste any time beating this guy senseless – which was exactly what he wanted to do. 

“Adam? Come on you gotta breathe for me…come on…oh my God” Kris said breathlessly as he clambered up onto the bed, tears blurring his vision. Adam’s head lolled to the side but he didn’t move as Kris held his mouth open, grasping his chin and forcing oxygen into his mouth. 

“Come on…” he panted, blowing more air into his mouth, his hands pumping his heart even while he saw fresh blood from the bullet wound. Quickly he pressed the nurses call button before he resumed CPR, determined to get Adam back. 

“Come on baby, this isn’t how it’s supposed to be…” his voice choked off as he pushed another lungful of air through his lips, tears dripping down onto Adam’s pale cheeks. 

“We’re supposed to grow old together…sit on rocking chairs on our front porch…Fucking BREATHE!” he yelled, smashing his fist down onto Adam’s chest – which seemed to be the jolt Adam’s heart needed to snap back into life, because he miraculously started breathing, coughing and choking harshly, his lungs rattling. 

“Oh thank God” Kris cried, immediately cradling Adam to his chest just as the medical team rushed in. 

“He’s breathing” he assured them, heedless of the tears that rolled down his cheeks. Adam clutched his arm weakly: sucking in deep breaths of sweet oxygen, in almost too much pain to even talk. 

“We’ll take it from here. Thank you Sir” one of the nurses said, kindly helping Kris down from the bed (once he’d relinquished his hold on Adam that is). Quickly he stepped aside as the team got to work checking Adam over, their voices hushed and serious as they fitted an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. 

“Who’s that?” one of them asked, noticing the crumpled form still on the ground. 

Kris’s expression hardened. “This is the mongrel who’s responsible for doing this to him. You need to call security”

“Of course” 

Kris ran a hand through his sweaty hair as he turned toward the doorway, spotting Eber, Leila and Neil out in the corridor. 

“Kris! What the hell happened in there?” Eber asked, taking in the young man’s dishevelled appearance. 

Kris slumped down onto a chair, exhausted. “The stalker nearly killed him, tried to smother him with a pillow. I had to…”

Leila enveloped him in her arms when he crumbled, stroking his back warmly as garbled words escaped Kris’s lips. Something about CPR. 

“It’s alright, you’re ok. You’re both going to be ok. You saved his life Kris” she whispered, turning her gaze to one of the doctors who had stepped out of Adam’s room. 

“You really did. Your quick thinking, coupled with the CPR kept his heart moving until we could get in there. He’d be dead if you hadn’t stepped in when you had” 

Kris brushed at his eyes. “Thanks. Can I see him?”

“Of course”

Kris made sure all his tears were gone as he went back into the room, followed closely by the Lamberts who all clustered around Adam’s bed. 

“Hey” Adam said, his voice shot. He gripped Kris’s hand tightly as a loud caterwauling began outside. It seemed David had arrived and was in the process of being as loud as he possibly could. 

“Let me just go take care of that” Eber said, stepping outside. He shut the door behind him so they couldn’t hear what he said, but his face was red when he re-entered, and oddly David wasn’t with him. 

“Dad, you’re so badass” Adam said weakly. 

“Yeah well, he was getting on my nerves. Oh and by the way you might need a new manager. I think I scared him off” Eber said, sitting on the side of the bed and resting his large hand on Adam’s leg. 

Adam smiled and pulled Kris down beside him, unable to put into words the depth of his feelings for the other man. Tears filled his eyes and he didn’t bother to wipe them away as the full reality of what had happened began to sink in. He’d almost died today – he would have been dead now if Kris hadn’t stepped in. It was a humbling thought, and Adam wasn’t so sure he liked being reminded of his own mortality quite so harshly. 

“It’s ok” Kris whispered, holding him close as he own eyes welled again. Outside he was barely aware of the hospital security leading the blonde man off, of the Police snapping handcuffs on Adam’s burly bodyguards, and David – all he cared about was the man in his arms. 

Quietly the others stepped from the room, allowing the young couple some privacy. David was nowhere to be seen, which Eber was thankful for as he escorted his family to the cafeteria for a much -needed caffeine hit. He was sure those involved would pay for what they’d done, but right now all he was focussed on was his elder son. As he waited in line he sent a prayer up to the Universe for sending Kris Allen into Adam’s life, he was the perfect fit, and Eber knew they were going to have a long and healthy life together.


	32. 32

**Epilogue  
6 months later**

“Kris I can’t see where I’m going!” 

Kris leant in closer and pressed a kiss to Adam’s cheek as he guided him through the home they shared in downtown Los Angeles. 

“Isn’t that the point?”

Adam snorted but kept his hands outstretched as he tried to work out what Kris was up to. It had been six months since the stalker and things were going great guns between them. They’d moved into a stylish condo right in the city and Kris had found a job working as a sound mixer for a city-based music agency. While he dearly wanted to compose his own music for films, this was at least a step into the industry. 

It had been an interesting few months for them both – Adam especially. His stalker, Jeremy Styles was currently residing in a Los Angeles prison cell doing 15 years for harassment, breaking and entering, trespassing and attempted murder as well as a myriad of other crimes. He couldn’t believe the extent to which that sicko had gone, even paying off his manager David. That had been the biggest shock of them all because they’d worked together for years before it had all apparently gone sour for the other man. Adam couldn’t believe it when David had admitted he’d been jealous of the fame Adam had – as a manager of a renowned rock star David had assumed some of that notoriety would rub off and had become insanely jealous when it hadn’t. 

That’s where Jeremy had stepped in – an unsavoury character with unknown origins who’d paid David 2 million just to get close to the star – but that opportunity had been lost when someone had disturbed him while he’d been in Adam’s room back in Madison Square Garden last year. That single lost moment had spurred him into further actions that even David had been unaware of. Jeremy had always been resourceful. 

After he’d recovered from the vicious assault Adam had changed his whole management team. He’d released David from his employ (after all he couldn’t very well have a manager who was facing criminal charges could he?) and was now working with a new manager – a sassy young woman who’d already proved her worth by not swamping him with commitments after he’d been released from hospital. So far he hadn’t done much in the way of music – but he was starting to feel that itch to write again, and knew it wouldn’t be too long before he was back in the studio. 

“Kris what’s going on?” he asked as Kris gently pushed him down onto a chair. The delicious aroma of his favourite meal made his mouth water and he gasped in surprise when Kris whipped away the blindfold. 

The entire kitchen was covered in rose petals, they were everywhere, from the kitchen counter to the table he was sitting at, the floor a vision of deepest red. He giggled as Kris set a plate of steaming food in front of him – it was moments like this that kept their romance alive, and he adored that man. 

“What’s the occasion?” he asked, resting his hand around Kris’s waist as he was poured a glass of Veuve Cliquot. 

“Do I need a reason to spoil you?” Kris asked, sitting down opposite him. 

“No, I guess not”

“It’s just that it’s been a year since we first got together, and I wanted to make something special for you”

“Has it been a year?”

Kris chuckled. “Yes it has, and despite everything that’s happened I wouldn’t have you any other way. I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you”

Adam grinned and leant up so he could kiss Kris over the table. “Me too. I can’t imagine my life without you”

Kris smiled and sat down, his cheeks hot. While it wasn’t exactly a proper proposal, it felt like they’d made a commitment to each other. For him, it was Adam only. No one else could compare. He loved coming home to him every day, or waking up beside him or just simply hanging out together. 

Adam to felt the same way about Kris, and he couldn’t believe he could be so lucky as to find his soul mate. He knew lots of people who were still looking, searching the globe for the other half to their hearts, and he thanked the Universe that he didn’t have to search anymore. 

They say people come into your life for a season, a reason or a lifetime. Kris was far from a seasonal fling, but he had come into Adam’s life for a reason – he’d helped him find the strength in himself in times of great stress, and he was going to stay for a lifetime. 

Adam was sure of it.


End file.
